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Using the baby name of FB friend

(20 Posts)
Finsa Mon 19-Jan-15 12:55:28

I'm due to give birth within the next two months and have found a name that I love. I'm finding it really difficult to even consider any other name as I love it so much. Unfortunately, it's a rather unusual name (which has a bit of meaning to us religiously...think Haggai (this is not the name)) and has been used about two years ago by someone I am FB friends with. This girl is not a close friend, but she is the sister of one of my best friends who will be visiting me shortly after the birth. We all live in different countries and it's highly unlikely that the children would meet often, but we do have overlapping social groups when we are in the same country. And there's a possibility that we might all live in the same country one day.
Do you think it would be ok to use it? I don't know anyone else with this name although I have heard it as a surname occasionally.

yetanotherchangename Mon 19-Jan-15 12:58:49

I would be tempted to drop your best friend a note to say that you are intending (not thinking about) using the name, and that, whilst you don't see her sister very much, you hope she will take it as a compliment, etc.

In the same situation, I wouldn't be offended. Some people can be funny about it, but it's really their problem.

WowserBowser Mon 19-Jan-15 12:59:22

Some people wouldn't mind, others would be flattered. Why not ask your best friend for her thoughts?

HomeIsWhereTheHeartIs Mon 19-Jan-15 13:01:51

So it's the same name as your best friend's niece? And you're not close with the mother? And you live in different countries?
I wouldn't think twice - go for it!

HomeIsWhereTheHeartIs Mon 19-Jan-15 13:03:42

If you ask your friend, she might say "no"! Don't mention it until after baby is born and you have chosen the name.

Stubbed Mon 19-Jan-15 13:03:56

Don't think twice about it. If you like the name, use it. It doesn't belong to anyone.

scratchandsniff Mon 19-Jan-15 13:04:26

They don't own the name. I think you're worryingly unnecessarily. Mention to your friend how much you like the name and that you intend to use it and hope sister won't mind, but to be honest if she does mind then so what. If it was a very close friends child who you saw regularly then I'd say definitely run it past them first, but I really wouldn't worry too much in this situation.

SingRingPing Mon 19-Jan-15 13:06:01

I think just use it. You can't put off using a name just because other people use it. I have a friend who was complaining that her friend's sister used a similar (not even the same!) name and it made me realise that you can't please everyone, there will always be someone that will raise their eyebrows at something you do so just live your life and go for it!

Blahia Mon 19-Jan-15 13:07:28

I agree. A name doesn't belong to anyone. If you love it and feel strongly it's the one, then use it.

You could message your friend and tell her how you feel about the name and That you just wanted to give her a heads up (and tell her not to tell other people), but I wouldn't give her the option to say you 'can't use it' as this is your choice. smile

Go with your but feeling about the name x

softlysoftly Mon 19-Jan-15 13:11:34

If you didn't have FB I bet you wouldn't even know that childs name would you? Have you ever met said child or its parents or in fact your BFF in the last 6 months? A year?

Waaaaay too far removed to be an issue. Use the name. DON'T speak to your friend to give her chance to moan. If and when friend mentions it just brush it away work an "oh really? I forgot, lovely name isn't it?".

BathshebaDarkstone Mon 19-Jan-15 13:16:25

Use it! 2 of my DC are named after children I've met. smile

jazzyjenbo Mon 19-Jan-15 13:58:11

One of my actual friends has the name i wanted for my dd but i didnt want to reveal until she was born... I put a status on fb saying that we had a name but know someone with this name... If they have any objections voice it now..... Afew friends commented saying they hoped it wasnt the same as there childs but this girl didnt comment so we used it.

I'd love to know the name, searching for a name for dc3!

Finsa Mon 19-Jan-15 14:52:20

Thanks everyone. It looks like no one thinks I shouldn't use it so I probably will.
Jazzy, I like that idea! ( the name is Zephaniah, Zeph for short... Not everyone's cup of tea though)

HomeIsWhereTheHeartIs Mon 19-Jan-15 17:27:29

Lovely smile

softlysoftly Tue 20-Jan-15 11:26:37

Ooooh wish I'd heard that before naming Dc3 how do you pronounce it?

CurlyRedHairOK Tue 20-Jan-15 12:11:17

That's fine. Just send her a quick fb message saying that as she will probably know, no matter what name you choose, you will know somebody with a child with hat name and it is her.... Not overly apologetic or anything, just, don't be too surprised if we announce the baby's name as ........... Let her think it's narrowed down to a few.

aoife24 Tue 20-Jan-15 12:37:58

When you say she's a Facebook friend it sounds as if it's a rather tangential relationship so I wonder if there would be a problem. In any event if you like it, use it smile

brokenhearted55a Wed 21-Jan-15 00:28:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CurlyRedHairNow Wed 21-Jan-15 09:59:31

I've no idea what my friends' children's middle names are. In one ear, out he other. I remember their first names!

Theas18 Wed 21-Jan-15 10:05:42

Finsa

Zephaniah is a cool name. Your friend of a friend of a friend doesn't own it, the amazing poet Bejamin Zephanaiah does LOL

benjaminzephaniah.com/

Use it. In honour of this great man and if needs be tell her you've always loved his poems!

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