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FIL's reaction on our name choice!

(69 Posts)
cheesecakemom Mon 27-Oct-14 11:06:19

So we've always said we would not share names etc. For our 1st DD we didn't and everyone just found out when she was born.

This time we planned the same but FIL and MIL have been so invasive (as usual) asking every single time they talk to us and see us "have you two thought of names". We always give the same answer, we are still deciding. "What sort of names are you thinking of". And we always just say traditional names etc.

For some reason I got really annoyed and told him this time "Verity"!
The look on his face!!! And his reaction "Oh no what a terrible name, you're not going to name her that!!! It will turn into one of those things like Fifi Trixibelle or something" "don't name her that, you're joking"

That's the reason why I don't like telling people names because they can be quite offensive. Do people not think before they comment.

Quite honestly if that's the name we like the most I still intend to use it despite his comments. They then went on to say our 1st DD didn't need her middle name, it was just a waste of a name! Errr???? She has a traditional English name like Catherine/ Elizabeth/ Matilda nothing too different.

So what does everyone think of Verity?

We all really love it and it's too of the list at the moment. I hate that it's a word however it still has a great meaning.

We also have the following on the list >>

Astrid
Clara/ Claire
Heather
Margot
Meredith
Beatrix
Isabella (but doesn't really go with our surname)
Vivienne
Harriet

What do you think? Would you say Verity is in the same league as Fifi Trixibelle? What middle name should we use?

HowsTheSerenity Mon 27-Oct-14 11:10:39

Very Jeeves and Wooster-ish.
So I love them grin
I'm not a fan of Claire or Isabella but the others are lovely.

mymummademelistentoshitmusic Mon 27-Oct-14 11:11:30

No, Verity is a fantastic name. Not some made up twatdome. I know (well knew) a Verity who would have been in her 90's now, and know one my age, 40's, and know of one who's due Christmas time.
I could understand the reaction if you wanted a made up or trashy name, is be upset if my grandchild was saddled with one, but Verity? He must be thick.

Howlycopter Mon 27-Oct-14 11:12:47

Verity is lovely, I'd say it's the polar opposite of Fifi trixibelle. Your FIL is wierd, ignore him wink

pluCaChange Mon 27-Oct-14 11:13:43

Of course Verity isn't the same. What a ridiculous thing for him to say. Do you think he was wound up to say that no matter what the name had happened to be?

What you need to do is find the most Biblical name you can, and tell him you've changed your mind. Biblical can be defended as "traditional", but doesn't necessarily mean modern or mainstream. He'll be grateful for Verity after Mehitabel or Hephzibah!

Verity is lovely, both in sound and meaning.

Daisy17 Mon 27-Oct-14 11:14:39

It's a beautiful name. It would definitely be on my shortlist for DC2 were it not for DP's brother having had a rather disastrous relationship with one recently!! Would feel like rubbing things in.....

PercyHorse Mon 27-Oct-14 11:16:16

Verity is lovely.

The whole thing about your DD1 having a middle name being a waste of a name suggests that your ILs opinions don't merit any attention.

bealos Mon 27-Oct-14 11:18:12

Verity is not a made up name! Ha. Ignore him.

I remember my mother didn't like my son's name (Harper) and wanted to call him Rory - but I think now she couldn't imagine him called anything but Harper.

I love: Astrid and Margot (my dd was nearly either of these but knowing daughters of a friends with the same name put me off)

Vivienne - seriously cool. Friend named her daughter this recently and calls her Vivi for short. SO COOL.

HaveToWearHeels Mon 27-Oct-14 11:18:47

Lovely name, FiL is a twat !

TempsPerdu Mon 27-Oct-14 11:22:36

What a bizarre thing to say! Verity is lovely, and bears no resemblance at all to names like Fifi Trixibelle. There was one in my class at school (so early 30s now) and I also know a two-year-old Verity - perfectly normal name.

From your list I also like Astrid and Meredith, but tbh I see no reason to change from Verity (and anyway your FIL is unlikely to like either of these seeing as he has issues with Verity!)

Redhead11 Mon 27-Oct-14 11:23:08

Verity is lovely. And how can you waste a name?? Ignore FIL and just stick to your guns. While i have friends who have given their children names i would personally not touch with a barge pole, i have never been ill-mannered enough to say so. There are lots of polite ways to react to an unusual name, however much it is not to your own personal taste.

KnitterInTheNW Mon 27-Oct-14 11:26:51

I love the name Verity. In my nanny days I knew a family who has a new baby Verity, and her 2 year old big brother called her Vetily. Very cute!

BehindLockNumberNine Mon 27-Oct-14 11:28:18

Verity is a beautiful name. Ds had a lovely teacher when at primary school, called Verity. (She would be in her mid thirties now and is the only Verity I have ever come across)

Use it, it is beautiful.

moxon Mon 27-Oct-14 11:34:08

Love verity. Just ignore and carry on.

Butterpuff Mon 27-Oct-14 11:35:57

Love the name Verity do use it. I cant understand how it could stir a negative reaction. Its just a great name (and the name of a heroine in a book l like) the only reason we will not be using it is because I like cute little nicknames and I cant think of one for Verity.

MindReader Mon 27-Oct-14 11:37:15

Verity is lovely.

Your FIL is a berk. And a rude one at that.
My MIL opined that she was worried I might call my dd 'Sharon or Tracey'.
Snobby cow. She is called Carol and her dd is Julie. Ha!
I called my dd something diff but Sharon and Tracey are fine names too.
So is Fifi Trixibelle, if you've a mind.

But, Verity is a classic name and lovely in sound and meaning.

ConcreteElephant Mon 27-Oct-14 11:38:00

Verity is really nice and not remotely like Fifi Trixibelle - each to their own anyway, it's none of his business.

From your list, one of those is my name, and I also like Astrid and Harriet. I think those and Verity give me an image of a bright, sparky girl, happy and adventurous.

3pigsinblanketsandasausagerole Mon 27-Oct-14 11:39:32

Verity is lovely ignore the silly man

acharmofgoldfinches Mon 27-Oct-14 11:41:55

You might like to tell your FIL that Verity is a 17th century English name - the Virtue names were adopted by the English Puritan movement (16th-18th century) because they considered it blasphemous to use names from the Bible...

I think it's absolutely beautiful, very feminine and strong. It couldn't be more "traditional English" if it tried, compared to many of the lovely names which we assume are trad English but which are actually Hebrew or old Arabic.

It is nothing like Fifi-Trixibelle, which you might like to tell him is also based on some very old English names...

I wouldn't consider changing it for a moment...

PiggyPlumPie Mon 27-Oct-14 11:45:04

I love Verity! Also Harriet.

We were discussing with our DC what we would call them if they were born now IYSWIM and both were on the list. Wouldn't change their names of course, but tastes and times change!

Seriouslyffs Mon 27-Oct-14 11:45:25

It's a lovely name. Your fil hmm
What is it about men and being wrong and strident?

eurochick Mon 27-Oct-14 11:46:08

I love Verity. Ignore your silly FIL.

RiverTam Mon 27-Oct-14 11:48:41

ditto everyone else.

I like Meredith best from your list, Astrid and Harriet are nice too.

Your FIL sounds like an ignorant numpty.

OnlyLovers Mon 27-Oct-14 11:56:39

Well, Verity's lovely but it doesn't matter what others think as long as you like it.

Answer any further comments from your FIL with 'How rude'/'How silly' depending on what he says. Does he have nothing better to worry about?

cheesecakemom Mon 27-Oct-14 12:13:55

Feeling very reassured!! Thank you.
We thought we would accept their offer to watch DD while DH is in hospital with me for the delivery but I honestly now couldn't stand all their comments.

Another comment was about how DD1 wouldn't fight to feed her baby sister (with a bottle) if I just breastfed. I told DH and he can't believe his mother said that. (And by the way I am pro breast feeding but also pump so DH can be involved and he does one feed a day. It's not even any of their business - so they won't be coming/ involved anymore.

Thanks for the feedback on the names. I'm glad it's a normal name and pregnancy hormones aren't raging through and affecting my name picking skills smile

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