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Two middle names?

(19 Posts)
MyFeetAreCold Sat 01-Mar-14 23:53:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oldandcobwebby Sat 01-Mar-14 23:59:42

You are right.

fideline Sun 02-Mar-14 00:01:50

You are right.

Particularly lovely idea for adopted DC. All strands of their identity reflected in their names.

pollyontheshore Sun 02-Mar-14 00:07:54

I think that sounds a really lovely idea.

I love having two middle names, never found it a problem. My son only has one though (had enough trouble choosing a first and one middle name we both liked.)

joanofarchitrave Sun 02-Mar-14 00:10:45

I adore my middle name. I've used it occasionally as my main name. I've given my ds two middle names, one for each side of the family.

I obviously therefore think you are completely reasonable grin but these are your dh's children too. He does have a right to a say. Would he feel differently about one middle name each? Would that be a compromise you could live with?

MyFeetAreCold Sun 02-Mar-14 00:23:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

joanofarchitrave Sun 02-Mar-14 00:26:29


Does your dh have a middle name himself or is it just a bit alien to him to have them at all?

MyFeetAreCold Sun 02-Mar-14 00:39:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hulafox Sun 02-Mar-14 03:04:02

What will the surname be? Could that be the name from your DH's side of the family?

I am currently having the same dilemma. I am a family name on my side of the family that spans 6 generations so has to be a middle name. As DH's parents are separated, it's his paternal surname that we will use, and I have though that using a 2nd middle name from the maternal side of his family would balance. But I do have concerns about it being too much of a mouthful, or considered a bit pretentious. My mum had 4 names and has hated it her whole life - she finds it a pain on all her official documentation.

Your situation is different but perhaps the surname thing will help!

BikeRunSki Sun 02-Mar-14 03:35:06

It's a lovely idea. Me, my sister, my children all have 2 middle names. All good, no problems, lots of family history.

squoosh Sun 02-Mar-14 04:05:23

I think a middle name to honour each familiy is lovely.

How often do you need to tell people your middle names? Not very often. What difference does it make if there is one middle name or two? None.

Italiangreyhound Sun 02-Mar-14 09:21:28

You are right!

If he does not want two then the one from his side could drop out!

Or maybe one could have your side's name and one his sides?

Our dd has my mum's middle name (which is similar to my maternal grandma's first name) as a middle name.

Hopefully, our ds will have my father-in-laws's name (which was his father's, my husband's paternal grandfather's, first name).

jinglebitch Sun 02-Mar-14 09:56:06

My dd1 had two middle names as one was for my dying Nanny, but was very short, and I wanted something else to balance it out as our surname is also one syllable. Of course, we then had to give dd2 two middle names to fend off future opportunities for whingeing. Dc3 will most probably have two, although if it's a boy there are NO NAMES so I'll be struggling to just find one. Anyway, to answer your question, yes, Dec persuade him round to your way of thinking- effectively you've not had the chance to pick names, so if you're picking two middle names it's effectively the same as anyone else picking a first and a middle.And he's depriving you of the right to pick two names if he doesn't let you wink
Congratulations by the way!!

QueenofKelsingra Sun 02-Mar-14 11:38:08

my DS1 has 2 middle names. both family names, one from my side and one from DH's. The names were too important to risk not having another DS to use the other name so it took all of about 30 seconds to decide to use both.

DTs have one middle name each, again family names that were important but not as crucial as the 2 DS1 has. again one from my side and one from DH's. had it not been twins DC2 would have only had one name depending on the gender.

if we have DC4 s/he may well have 2 again to keep it 'fair' across the families.

I think it is a lovely idea, especially for an adopted child to have a name from both sides of their new family. (I personally don't understand the point of middle names for any other reason than in rememberance/reference though)

TravellingToad Sun 02-Mar-14 11:45:38

You are right.

Both my two have two middle names. It sounds nicer.

OneOfOurLilkasIsMissing Sun 02-Mar-14 14:37:51

You are right!

All 3 of mine have two middle names each, and it's never ever been a problem, or too much of a mouthful. Actually I love middle names, they're a great opportunity to do something like remember/honour people, or use that name you really like but can't use as a first name etc. My eldest child chose her own middle names, so for her it was a way of choosing some of her own identity, and kind of moving on and having a "new start" (for want of better words), and her middle names continue to be really special to her.

I think it's only when you get to 3+ middle names the child might possibly wish they had less later in life. I don't know why your DH thinks it would be a problem, maybe he wouldn't like to have 2 middle names himself and thinks the children would feel the same way?

MyFeetAreCold Sun 02-Mar-14 21:50:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cuxibamba Sun 02-Mar-14 23:03:52

I think that's a lovely idea. My DS1 has two middle names to reflect two sides of his identity and it's never been clumsy or awkward at all.

MyFeetAreCold Sat 08-Mar-14 21:14:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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