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Baby names

family members putting you off names?

19 replies

MrsCharlieD · 28/10/2013 11:34

Hi ladies
is anyone else having issues with family members wading in on your baby name list? Me and my hubby are the alternative one's in our otherwise conservative family and they always knew we wouldn't pick common names but i feel like every name we suggest is being rubbished so we pick something normal. Even the normal names we like such as layla are being labelled chavvy and common. Ah! X

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ManifestingMingeWhispersAlone · 28/10/2013 11:37

The best advice I can give anyone - DO NOT DISCUSS THE NAMES.

Just tell them what the baby is called once it is born.

It's your baby, their opinion is irrelevant. And it's a hardfaced cow that will turn around and say I don't really like it, when you have already named the baby.

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dreamingofsun · 28/10/2013 11:37

go with what you think best. my mother has absolutely no taste in names at all... and not only gave me awful name but suggested terrible ones for our children. They are from a different generation.

suggest you choose ones and then tell everyone once its born and not before

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imme · 28/10/2013 11:41

Yes, do not mention any names before the baby is born. I made that mistake with DC1 when we had short listed one particular name. We did not use it in the end but also did not announce the final choice until he was born.

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YummyMummybee · 28/10/2013 11:47

We learned the hard way not to discuss with family. Dh's mother who doesn't know sex of baby is insisting if it's a girl it should be named after her so after this pressure we've decided baby won't even have MILs name as middle name! Mil will hit the roof, how will she explain that to the neighbours!!! She also said if bsby is a boy it must be named after FIL.... So don't discuss with family!

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ManifestingMingeWhispersAlone · 28/10/2013 11:48

If they are mithering you for names, tell them half a dozen that you definitely won't be using. And let them go wild pulling them to pieces.

There is always someone to say, well I don't like Bob because I went to school with one and he was a knob, and jenny reminds me of that actress who once... Who gives a shit really? Just make sure the initials don't spell anything ridiculous and call it what you want. and spell it properly Grin

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MrsCharlieD · 28/10/2013 11:57

I do wish we had kept our names quiet now, but never mind it's too late now. I probably just need to stop being so sensitive x

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creepypenisreaper · 28/10/2013 12:05

I've had this problem, but mostly with colleagues. I just pretend that I haven't thought of any (when we've actually settled on the name) The annoying thing is, they'll say 'What names are you thinking of?' to which I'll reply 'No idea yet.' 'Oh but your DP said that you were going to call him blahblahblah. What a weird name, I've never heard of it'

(a) Thank you DP, I thought we decided not to tell our colleagues.
(b) Why do people play these silly little games when they already know the answer? Its obvious I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to hear your input.
(c) The name is NOT that weird, you just have haven't heard of it. You're not the fucking authority on baby names.

Sorry about the rant OP!

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MrsCharlieD · 28/10/2013 12:11

Ha ha no problem creepy!

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PinkParsnips · 28/10/2013 12:16

I've done the same as Creepy, just said oh we've got a few ideas but cant agree on one yet! (which is true for a girl!). Then change subject :-)

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Tommy · 28/10/2013 12:18

I agree with manifesting....
we didn't discuss any of our names with family - once the baby was born and named, they couldn't argue Grin

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scarevola · 28/10/2013 12:28

Either don't discuss it at all, or do it only when at the very long list stage when you're not particularly attached to any front runners. I liked hearing opinions on names, but only up to a point!

That said, we were down to a final two for our 3rd baby, and the 3DCs of some very good friends had a unanimous preference for one of them, we let that tip it.

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EspressoMonkey · 28/10/2013 12:42

I told MIL that we were not discussing baby names until baby was born. She brought the subject up over Sunday lunch and pushed and pushed to get something out of us. Then she said, "no pudding for you unless you tell me what names are on the short list". I thought she was joking, but she wasn't. I was not served pudding!

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impatienttobemummy · 28/10/2013 12:49

I couldn't give a toss what my family or DHs family think of our baby names! They are entitled to their opinion they know they won't change my mind! Don't let it other you it's your child after all

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Mim78 · 28/10/2013 12:51

Don't tell them anything!

Just tell them baby's name when it's born, that's the only way.

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Artandco · 28/10/2013 14:57

Never tell. I know our families will raise an eyebrow or two over name choices but by then will be too late

More everyone they know has named children: zac/ theo/Leo/Emily etc .. All lovely names but we prefer slightly different ie: Albert/ Thaddeus/ Quinn . So for that reason they will suggest others

Mil also thinks we should use ' family names'. These include Barry, Keith, and Winifred!

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Darling5 · 28/10/2013 19:31

Go with whatever you feel is best. It's your baby after all. If they want to name a baby then tell them to go have one.

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octopusinastringbag · 28/10/2013 19:34

Yes. Gabriel was the name of choice and they said how much they hated it, though to be fair they didn't know as I was keeping our name choice quiet.

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Lutrine · 28/10/2013 20:00

We told them a couple of names from our long list which we loved but knew we wouldn't use to avoid having the ones we actually wanted to use getting pulled apart. Mind you, we really loved Peggy for a girl and my MIL going "ooh I must brush my peggies" when she stayed over soon inadvertently spoiled that one!

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looki · 28/10/2013 21:22

Give them a few names from your long list that didn't make it to your short list and let them go for it.

MIL tried to give me her book of baby names and she named her children what I'd consider for the most part, awful names which she pronounces letter by letter in an incredibly posh accent (which is not her 'normal' voice). They sound ridiculous!

I have a similar type problem where my sister takes one of 'my' names and makes it sound silly by deliberately making a soft g where there should be a hard g and putting on different accents as she says them. I learned the hard way not to share my thoughts on names.....

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