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Middle name etiquette

(13 Posts)
YouDoTheMath Fri 19-Aug-11 13:18:19

If we have a girl, I want to use my mum's name as her middle name.

Trouble is, her name is VERY unfashionable.

Have you ever used an untrendy family name even though you've not really liked it, but because you know the person will be over the moon that you chose their name?

EdithWeston Fri 19-Aug-11 13:23:31

All my DCs have "family" middle names - including the peculiar, the unfashionable and the ordinary.

I think it's a lovely tradition (obviously), and anyway you can't predict what the fashions in names will be over the whole of their lifespan.

CurwySwide Fri 19-Aug-11 13:28:23

Could you maybe use two middle names? My mum had two - Mary and Gertrude - both family names. Don't think my mum or her mum liked Gertrude but it was 'watered down' a bit because of Mary.

NotJustKangaskhan Fri 19-Aug-11 13:40:29

Yes, my eldest got a very hated family middle name because it mattered a lot to his family. I've ended up really loving the name now that it's attached to him and think it's very sweet.

EverythingInMiniature Fri 19-Aug-11 13:44:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wearenotamused Fri 19-Aug-11 13:52:28

I have a family name as (one of) my mns but it was alright as it is a surname (a very obvious one) but I survived - It's nice having a family connection. Apart from people thinking it is a d-b surname

If you really want to do your Mum's name but don't actually like it, could you do a different version like from a different language - My sister did.

If your DC doesn't like their mn they will just pretend it isn't there - plenty do.

But even with the best will in the world if you don't like the name don't use it - find some other way to include your mum

Ephiny Fri 19-Aug-11 14:55:05

I wouldn't worry too much about the middle name, most people hardly ever use theirs on a day to day basis. Depends how strongly you feel about it though, if you really loathe it then don't, if just a bit indifferent to it, then why not, if it would make your mum happy?

sparkle12mar08 Fri 19-Aug-11 15:52:45

Malcolm and David. Both plain and distinctly unfashionable, but they mean the world to me and my family so they stayed. But at least they're plain rather than truly horrendous, they're not names I imagine my sons will be so desperate to change that they'll go for a deed poll.

minipie Fri 19-Aug-11 16:09:11

If I have a DS the poor child is going to end up with Bernard as one of his middle names for family reasons. Can't get more unfashionable than that! (I have decided it would be a step too far to inflict it on a DD)

Anyway, look at all the really unfashionable old-lady names that are now back in fashion. Olive, Pearl, Lily etc. No-one would have dreamed of calling their children those names in the 70s and 80s, now they are all the rage. So maybe your mum's name will be the Next Big Thing by the time your DD is old enough to care?

exoticfruits Fri 19-Aug-11 16:10:06

David is lovely and a classic-you can't go wrong with it.

The names of my parents are so dire that I wouldn't use them, if their parents had poor taste there is no need to pass it on. (they have people who actually like them on MN!)

HattieBistro Fri 19-Aug-11 18:37:27

We have used family names or variations of family names as middle names for all our dc's.

Are their no variations you can use, eg Daisy for Margaret etc? Did your relatives have any middle names? One of my dd's has a variation of my Mums mn.

somewherewest Sun 21-Aug-11 17:11:14

Agreeing with Ephiny regarding the insignificance of middle names. Literally no one outside my immediate family knows my middle name, although the initial crops up on official things occasionally. I likewise have no idea what middle names even very close friends and family have. And as other people have said, (un)fashionability is inherently transient.

InstantAtom Sun 21-Aug-11 17:45:49

Don't go by fashion. Choose a name you like with reasons you like.

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