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please help. everyone hates our boys name and its causing real problems betwenn me and dpa

(76 Posts)
itsybitsy08 Thu 28-Jul-11 11:32:05

I started a thread a while ago, but now know we are having a boy smile
DP picked Gabriel and although i didnt love it at first, it grew on me and was quite happy to use it.
However, my mam (she was nice about it) is 'really concerned' that he will get picked on.
My brother hates it and really ripped into it, thinking i was joking.
DPs sister hates it also and thinks he will get picked on.
Friends at work think he will get picked on, and have had a very luke-warm reaction from others.
DP is really upset about it all, and it has really put me off using the name, and its causing abit of tension.
I know it is up to us what we can him, but i am worried if that many people think he will get bullied, maybe he will, and is that fair to impose it on him?
Any ideas on other names because i am totally at a loss! (We have a DD lexie)
Really long i know, thanks for reading.

wellwisher Thu 28-Jul-11 11:34:16

I think it's nice. That said, the only Gabriel I've known dropped it when he went to uni and switched to using his middle name instead.

AlmaMartyr Thu 28-Jul-11 11:34:48

Aww, Gabriel is a gorgeous name. I know a 9 year old Gabriel and he hasn't been picked on. Your family are being pretty mean, I'm sure people will get used to it once he's born.

marjolaine Thu 28-Jul-11 11:41:40

I like the name Gabriel; it sounds nice and is a classic, and I like the nickname Gabe too. It's one we considered for DS (doesn't go with the surname though). How would a Gabriel get picked on? Surely then boys named Daniel (same sound) or Michael (also an angel) would be bullied for their names too.

MsChanandlerBong Thu 28-Jul-11 11:42:10

I think Gabriel is a really lovely name - and suits boys/men of all ages.
Personally I would go ahead and call your DS Gabriel as that is the name you and your DP both loved from the start, but don't mention it to your helpful family until after he is born. Surely they won't be so rude outspoken then?

glittershoes Thu 28-Jul-11 11:46:47

I think it is lovely and know a gorgeous 4 year old Gabriel.

It really isn't that unusual and certainly not a name I would think would lead to being picked on. Just checked the 2010 stats and it was well inside the top 100 boys names - number 78 with 874 little Gabriels being born last year!

Chandon Thu 28-Jul-11 11:47:43

The lesson learned is:

NEVER tell ANYONE what name you are planning to give your DC.

Instead, TELL them once he or she is born. As then it is a FACT.

By telling them before DC is born, it is as if you ask them for approval.

BTW, I think it's a nice name.

Just DON'T tell anyone what you plan to name your children, please just don't.

Sprink Thu 28-Jul-11 12:01:02

If you ask someone about a name before the child is born, you'll get lots of negative comments. If you present a child to someone and say, "This is xxx", you generally won't hear those comments.

The trick is to not solicit opinions. I have never in all my life heard of a family rejecting a child because of its name, as long as it's presented as a fait accompli! They grow to love the name because they love the baby, and then can't imagine the child as anything other than its name. Watch, soon enough he'll be "our Gabriel."

Gabriel is a fine name and reminds me of a) the archangel, and b) the most beautiful man I dated in my 20s. So gorgeous was he that the female employees in our office achingly called him "Gabe the Babe." He was also bright, kind, athletic, and the teensiest bit goofy. Swoon.

lockets Thu 28-Jul-11 12:04:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

giyadas Thu 28-Jul-11 12:05:49

i think it's a nice name. Probably will get shortened to Gabe by schoolfriends though, and that's quite a nice name too.

Mousesmummy Thu 28-Jul-11 12:08:02

Itsy we had exactly the same issue last year!! Gabriel was the name boh me and dh loved but my parents openly stated they thought it was an awful name, we have 3 dd's and my mum said "well we hope you have another girl" Charming smile
We got the whole he will be picked on, called gay blah blah blah and we did discuss it.
However, it was our conclusion that children are picked on for a huge variety of reasons, being too fat, wearing specs, not having the right whatever blah blah and that we loved the name so much we wanted it.
When he arrived and we told people not one commented in a negative way. I am sure my mum stil doesn't love it but she loves him and so the name has grown on her I guess.
If at school he gets picked on then we will help him to work out ways f dealing with bullies in exactly the same way as we would over any other issue.
Only you two know if you love the name - it was our only choice so a no brainer!

moaningmurtle Thu 28-Jul-11 12:10:32

I think it's lovely, chances are it'll be shortened to Gabe anyway.

I think it's already been said but NEVER tell friends and family the name before the baby has been born as EVERYONE always has an opinion. If you leave it until he's been born they'd have just said 'ahhh that's nice' (well you'd hope so anyway) grin

coccyx Thu 28-Jul-11 12:12:16

If you like it then stick with it

Tillylove Thu 28-Jul-11 12:14:50

My 16 year old brother is called Gabriel. To be fair he goes under the name of Gabe these days but does love his name and he is very cool - never been teased! He really suits his name!

We haven't told anyone our name as I am sure it will have mixed reviews from my family and friends. My Mum is VERY critical when it comes to names and doesn't like anything out of the ordinary so therefore we have kept quiet as she will just make me feel sad and unsure of our choice. Like others have said it's a gorgeous name and the only people that matter in the decision are you and your husband.

Hope the tension eases!

CinnabarRed Thu 28-Jul-11 12:19:31

I know a couple of Gabriels, but as with Tillylove both go by Gabe. It's such an obvious abbreviation - how do you feel about Gabe?

itsybitsy08 Thu 28-Jul-11 12:19:35

thankyou everyone.
the reason given was that it sounds like a girls name, its girly?? or it had GAY in it. it makes my brother think of a 70 year old preist (he managed to spit this out between spluttering with laughter)
well i am called lauren and no one ever called me laurence.
it is just abit upsetting - have really learnt my lesson - I was telling them, not asking for an opinion, but as mentioned some seem to think because baby is not born they have free reign to be rude.
DP is very upset about it also and has said that he will just let me pick, as he obviously is no good at it, although he does think that we should just stick with it anyway! (sensitive)
maybe a compromise on middle names - we had Gabriel John David after our fathers, we could pick an alternative that he could choose to use if he hates Gabriel as much as all our family does!! Any ideas on that?
We live in North East, quite working class sort of area, and maybe that is influencing them - no taste smile !

TheOriginalNutcracker Thu 28-Jul-11 12:24:07

Ds (8) has a Gabriel in his class, and he gets called Gabe for short. He is one of the sweetest boys I know. I like it smile

itsybitsy08 Thu 28-Jul-11 12:25:56

Oh, yeah, I like Gabe. Me and DP thought that Gabe was not girly sounding at all, and he could be known as that.
Also, DPs work friend knew a Gabriel at school, and he went by Gib, which again I like the sound of, and is not girly either.

Sprink Thu 28-Jul-11 12:32:45

Gabriel Byrne (actor)

Gabriel Garcia Marquez (Nobel prize winning author)

Roman Gabriel (footballer, and yes, it's a stretch as it seems to be surname)

Gabe Carimi (All American football left tackle)

Gabe Paul (general manager and president for major league baseball team)

Gabe Saporta (former lead singer and bassist of Midtown, and current lead singer of Cobra Starship--no, me neither, but Cobra Starship sounds hard as nails, doesn't it? ;-)

MyMamaToldMe Thu 28-Jul-11 12:35:50

I love the name!

MooMooFarm Thu 28-Jul-11 12:39:51

OP sod what they all think and stick with Gabriel! I love it; it's classic, classy and not so unusual that he'll stick out.

I agree that you shouldn't tell anybody the names you like before the birth because somebody will always say they don't like it and sway you...

Mousesmummy Thu 28-Jul-11 12:39:56

Gabriel Abonlahor? Aston Villa Striker?

AlmaMartyr Thu 28-Jul-11 12:45:52

Gabe is the lead character in Cliffhanger as well isn't he? He's manly!

Do stick with it, it's such a lovely name.

ErnesttheBavarian Thu 28-Jul-11 12:47:28

Don't tell people name till baby there! Gabriel is fab name. Big in Germany & Switzerland

muminthemiddle Thu 28-Jul-11 12:49:44

I love Gabriel.
Someone will always have something negative to say about any name.
A woman I know insisted on telling me that she had once owned a cat which had the same name as my dd. So what I thought it is a person's name you are the weird-do for giving your cat a human name.

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