MN makes picking a name harder than ever...!(20 Posts)
Is it just me, or since being on Mumsnet, have you found choosing your perfect name much more difficult?? I named DS before I'd even heard of this site, and I love his name still very much, 2 and a half years later. He has a very popular first name and a fairly unusual middle name, and put together they almost rhyme, so I know for certain on here they would get a good battering! And I think that if I'd put it to the MN jury, I might have been put off his name (too common, too unusual, don't sound good together etc.) and called him something much more.... hmmm... MN friendly!! (I am so glad I didn't!)
Although not pregnant at the moment, I am totally obsessed with choosing the perfect name for future DC. However, MN makes things sooo much more difficult!! Not only do I see names being slatered (which puts me off, although I know it shouldn't), but also it introduces a load more lovely names to my already too long shortlist!
And also, I'm surprised and saddened by how many mummies regret their name choices for their babies. My DH is determined that it is his turn to choose out next child's name (as I chose our DS's). However, he refuses to discuss names and vetoes almost everything I suggest, grrr! (I know it is unreasonable of me to expect him to think about names when we're not even expecting a baby yet, but you know...!!)
So does anyone agree with any of that, or is it just lil' ol' me...?
definitely agree with you .
we chose first 7 dcs names without problems , not concerned about popularity etc . with dc8 with mumsnet the names we considered are variously too posh about too be trendy , the new ruby and i've never felt more undecided .
if mumsnet had been around with dc1 to 7their names all of which i love would have been seen as too popular and occassionally c****y , an american surname , unusable as rhymes with a veneral disease , unusable and unique , A surname and common , only suitable for a cat , and poncey with a nn that will cause teasing . i' m not sure whether we'd have still used them if mumsnet had been around ,but they would have certainly felt less perfect , wonderful and i would probably have spent at least a year worrying about our choice .
just to add i still love the dcs names regardless of what others on mumsnet think.
I couldn't agree more. We chose our ds's name 7 years ago before I knew of mumsnet. We're a French/English family and chose a name that was popular in France but less common in England. In real life the reaction to his name was great and so everyone was happy. He has never been teased in school and seems to like his name .
Since joining mumsnet I have come across comments that his name is 'poncy', 'posh' even 'gay' ....Now, I am a confiden person and still love his name, but these comments do hurt me a little, if I'm honest.
And overall I'm glad I hadn't consulted mumsnet because I would probably have been put off using his name, which, as I said I do love!
I think we place far too much emphasis on someone's name. We should ban these forums, choose the names we love and teach our children to be more open-minded and less judgemental of someone's name .
The other problem with asking a bunch of random internet users is that we have no idea of their tastes or values.
Say you love elegant, classic names and suggest the name Seraphina, for example. If the posters happen to have completely different tastes and love names like Chardonnay or Evie or whatever then they are unlikely to like the name Seraphina. And vice versa.
Without knowing someone's tastes their advice isn't really that useful, is it?
The MN baby names section is savage! Throw in any given name and it seems to find a way to denounce it is too popular, too unusual, too posh, too "chavvy" (my 3 year old's name has been described as two of these). I hope the mum on that big thread DOES call her daughter Beryl!
Fairy, I agree. I admire Tummyticklers (think that's her name) confidence to stick with the name she loves.
I bet it is! I'm glad I wasn't posting here when I had my two children, as you have to laugh when you're children are already named.
My dd's name has been described as chav, posh, popular, too frilly, too boring.
And once when somebody wanted opinons on the name that is my son's, a poster cut and pasted about fifty 'nos' and then bolded them. I laughed out loud at that !
Every single name will be disliked by someone for some reason, be it too common, too old fashioned, too close to someone they were bullied by, too 'try hard', whatever...
Although the threads I really don't get is where the OP asks 'please find a name for my dd', asking a random group of internet users to choose HER dd's name . Without knowing anything about our tastes, how helpful is that?!
I've had lots of ideas and inspiration from the baby names board, and more laughs than I care to remember, but I would never EVER change my mind about a name I liked just because a bunch of anonymous posters on Mumsnet didn't like it. My son's name would probably be completely ripped to shreds on here, but I really couldn't care less.
(Having said that, I did a search on my son's name before registering him, just to make sure none of you thought it was the 'next big thing')
Good point, MamaLazarou. By avoiding names that are loved by everyone you'll avoid names that will, by definition, become popular/overused.
I didn't post for advice with DS, but I did search his name on MN and it was universally panned - I don't care because I like it and it suits him.
On here, I might 'critique' a list of names that are just adequate and it would seem like a super obsessive name nerd, but in real life when somebody says 'these are my children jack and ellie' it doesn't register in the same way as it does here. Because you see the children more than the name. ON here, obviously you are ONLY thinking about the name and there's no child to distract you from the name.
I think I enjoy the name boards because I'm a name nerd and also I'm not naming any babies in the very near future. When I am about to name someone I think I'll be far too scared to even read the posts on here never mind post my suggestions for critique by others. I am just too darned sensitive!
I think mumsnet gives us a good idea as to which names are becoming popular and are probably best avoided .
Thanks for all your replies! Glad to know I'm not the only one!
And some good points you all make!
Eva, I'm sure you're right, but strangely, a lot of the names that people seem to like on here, I cannot imagine anyone actually using in RL (well not where I live anyway!), as lovely as they may be! E.g. Clementine, Persephone, Edmund, Caspar, and many more... Hmmm
i think it's useful in determining which names you love and which you merely like , if no matter what negatives are bought up you can find a reason why that won't matter then you love the name . if any negative connotations are mentioned and it really worries you or makes you doubt the name eg popularity , unfortunate nns etc then you probably only like the name and need to go back to the drawing board .
not sure it's a brilliant foreteller of popularity to be honest martha , matilda and ava supposedly megapopular yet i've yet to meet one or hear of any up here in scotland.
Couldn't give a rat's arse what the "mumsnet massive" think of my child's name.
But as evamummy says, it's a bloody good indicator of what is about to be massive.
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