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Mum hates my baby name, wdyt?

(54 Posts)
illhaveabrandy Thu 16-Dec-10 01:26:39

I'm 5 months pg with twins-- both boys. We had a name for one of the babies quite early on but we just couldn't agree on a name for other baby. FINALLY we came across Jensen, which we both loved.
Yay yay, happy happy.

Today I told my mum the names we have chosen and she was horrified; "Jensen? Oh no! I once knew a Jensen and he was awful..." <cue twenty mins of her telling me that she simply refused that we use the name> GRR. What do I do now?

DooinMeCleanin Thu 16-Dec-10 01:28:34

You call your baby Jensen. That's what you do.

If your mum is as stubborn as my Nan she will mispronounce and misspell his name for the first few months in protest and the realise she just looks a bit silly and will start behaving herself smile

MadamDeathstare Thu 16-Dec-10 02:22:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thumbplumpuddingwitch Thu 16-Dec-10 02:27:43

WEll, it's up to you. I wouldn't have let my parents dictate baby names to me on the basis that they didn't like the name, but if they had a reason to hate the name because of association, I might have considered changing it.
For e.g. - my Dad had a previous fiancée to my Mum, who dumped him rather badly - I wouldn't therefore use her name because of the assocation it has for him.

So in your case I guess it depends how much the Jensen that your mother knew affected her daily life - and whether you care that much.,

EauRudolph Thu 16-Dec-10 02:34:19

Call him Jensen, it's a lovely name. My mum hates the name we've chosen if DC2 is a boy but I told her that we love it and she'll just have to get used to it. It's hard enough choosing baby names between 2 people, don't let your mum get involved as well!

diddl Thu 16-Dec-10 09:12:02

Why do people discuss names with anyone in RL?

Your baby-you name him what you want.

AllieW Thu 16-Dec-10 10:10:25

While I'm not overly keen personally, if you like it then go for it. We met a certain amount of familial resistance to Arthur and happily ignored them because we like the name and they can lump it!

maxpower Thu 16-Dec-10 10:14:34

It hasn't got anything to do with her. I'm sad for you that she hasn't got the sensitivity to keep her opinions to herself. I don't particularly like any of my 4 nephews names but I wouldn't dream of telling their parents. I'm sure there are people who raise an eyebrow at my DD's name but that's their problem, not mine.

Highlandgirl Thu 16-Dec-10 10:30:18

I've got this problem currently I feel your pain.

Don't listen to her...!

Highlandgirl Thu 16-Dec-10 10:32:22 My-Father-ie-grandfather-to-be-is-not-happy-with-p ossible-baby-name

See my thread...! smile

auntyfash Thu 16-Dec-10 10:53:32

It's totally up to you what you call your baby. My daughter is pg at the mo, and tbf I like her name choices she has, but if I didn't there is no way on this earth that I would tell her, and I certainly wouldn't expect my views on a name to influence her decision. Stick to your guns! I think Jensen is lovely btw.

crumpet Thu 16-Dec-10 10:55:48

We didn't discuss possible baby names with anyone. We simply introduced the babies with their names after they were born.

crumpet Thu 16-Dec-10 10:56:50

Although I have to say for my part I was slightly superstitious - didn't want to invest too much personality into the bump until I knew it had safely arrived.

lukewarmcupofmulledwine Thu 16-Dec-10 11:06:12

Just tell your mum that you haven't made any final decisions yet, and then if she asks again say you've decided not to tell anyone your choices until after they are born (and please don't! everyone knows someone with your chosen name who is horrible, why put yourself through the agony...).

Then if you still want Jensen you present her with a fait a complis (sp?) once they are born, and she won't care then anyway.

<<and at 5 months pregnant you will probably change your mind anyway a hundred times between now and the birth>>

ragged Thu 16-Dec-10 11:13:11

Just brave it out, by the time the baby is 1yo she won't even remember why she didn't like it. The only Jensen in her life that ever mattered will be her DGS.

diddl Thu 16-Dec-10 11:43:14

"you present her with a fait a complis (sp?) once they are born, and she won't care then anyway."

That´s what we did-and Mum still said "oh I don´t like that"

I really think that she expected me to change itangrysad

deepfriedcupcake Thu 16-Dec-10 11:47:18

Let her get over it.

And if YOU decide to go for something different, don't tell her. Let it be your secret.

I like it, for what it's worth.

AllieW Thu 16-Dec-10 11:53:33

diddl, I think your Mum was really rude! Fancy saying that after the event (as it were)!

My grandmother in law was at least slightly more subtle. We already knew she wasn't keen on Arthur (again I think she'd known someone unpleasant by the name) and she gave us this elaborate story about how she'd "dreamed" that our little boy was going to be called William. Never mind that we'd already discounted the name on account of its ubiquity!!

But people do come round. Even my S-i-L (who'd suggested that Arthur wasn't coming back - hah!) admitted the other day that he looks like an Arthur.

I really think your Mum will be persuaded eventually, illhaveabrandy!

sadiesadiemarriedlady Thu 16-Dec-10 11:58:26

It's YOUR baby, YOU call it what YOU want and if anyone doesn't like it, TOUGH! BTW it's a lovely name choice x

Thistledew Thu 16-Dec-10 12:06:57

I have a friend called Jensen. He is a lovely, kind, friendly, caring, funny guy.

Just to balance out the Jensen karma.

lukewarmcupofmulledwine Thu 16-Dec-10 12:08:45

diddl - we had the same with our second DD. Her given name is a fairly standard one, but we call her by a familiar version of that. Both sets of grandma's hated it (the famiiar version) because its apparently a boy's name (no it's not). 18 months down the line and they've more or less given up trying to call her by her 'proper' name, as she doesn't have a clue what they're on about! I smirk quietly when they call 'proper name, proper name' response...'familiar version'...she turns round and toddles over with a grin on her face.

So you will win in the end..... <evil cackle>

theagedparent Thu 16-Dec-10 12:10:39

My Mum hated the names we chose for our first 2 dds. She soon got used to them. I would have been more worried if she had liked the names as she has hideous taste x

LittleYellowTeapot Thu 16-Dec-10 12:43:56

She'll soon come around smile

My MIL hated my eldest's name - she loves it now!

expectingno3 Thu 16-Dec-10 13:02:43

I learnt not to mention names before the baby was born soon after dd1 (now 8). I mentined a few to my MIL, who, when dd was born, proceeded to say 'but you really liked Charlotte didn't you? I know she disliked Grace, the name we gave my dd, because she thought it was old woman's name (she's 78) though she now says how lovely it is etc etc. I'll never forget the fact she was so opinionated about our name choice.
Arkward moment last week when DD1 kept telling me to tell MIL our choice of names for this one! You presumably haven't got a clue who your Mums' Jensen was. She'll have to get over it!

FortunateHamster Thu 16-Dec-10 13:16:49

Jensen is a lovely name - your mum will get over it!

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