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Just wondering how many of you...

(24 Posts)
thereisalightanditnevergoesout Tue 30-Nov-10 11:44:58

didn't have a name picked by the time your DC arrived.

And, if you didn't, did you feel at all panicky/rushed into choosing something to keep relatives happy?

I'm still wobbling (my fault, I've been talking to people about names - and it's what they didn't say that has left me feeling rubbish - I really should know better by now).

tummytickler Tue 30-Nov-10 13:09:11

We never have.
We have always taken a list of 3 or 4 onto hospital and then chosen one once the baby had been born.
I am one of those loons who needs to see what the baby looks like though grin
I have insisted on having a name within an hour of them being born though. I don't like a nameless baby, but I found when i looked at my baby I just knew <puke> grin

Bicnod Tue 30-Nov-10 13:11:06

We had a list but no clear front runner. DS was nameless for 3 days - I didn't feel rushed, I quite liked having him as just baby for the first few days.

fel1x Tue 30-Nov-10 13:23:51

With DC2 we didnt have a name picked out before. I decided straight away omce he was born but DH was not completely happy at first (although said he was and it all came out later) so it kind of took the shine off it a little bit.
DS1 had a name pickd out for months before hand and |I will def choose in advance if we have another one and stick to it!!!

Iwasthefourthwiseman Tue 30-Nov-10 13:33:02

DD2 was named when she was a week old, and it was really stressful for some reason. I couldn't bear the thought of people waiting (and the annoying ones constantly asking). I did feel panicked into it in the end. She has a lovely name but dh and had a few arguments over the whole situation.

But if you don't have a name, you don't have a name. It has to be right.

thereisalightanditnevergoesout Tue 30-Nov-10 13:55:57

You see, with the others I've pretty much had a name picked out from the start - and a running list of 'contenders' for years (and yes, I know how mad that makes me sound! )

It's boys' names we have a particular problem with - I could name another 20 girls quite easily, but after we had DS, we sort of used up the name that we'd planned on - and now we find ourselves in a pickle.

I'm 36 weeks and I can't really be sure we even have a shortlist. DH is annoying no help - he tends to focus on a name he likes then stops thinking about it, because he's happy with the two suggestions he's made.

I know we'll have people phoning us asking what he's called and I don't want to be pressured into picking something to stop the phone calls, but I have real concerns I'll be there with a 6 week old nameless baby.

5GoldenFimbos Tue 30-Nov-10 14:01:22

No. Had names picked out for both dd an ds, couldn't cope with the stress of it all, afterwards nor my mother's head nipping about the name.

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 30-Nov-10 14:45:30

DC one, had a definite name if boy as its a family name on both sides. Had a choice of 2 names if a girl. Was a boy.

DD had a boys name choosen but no girls names, she was a girl. DH held her while I was in the 3rd stage of labour and said what about.... It was a name I'd suggested but he hadn't seemed keen before. Agreed but was a bit wobbly about it for the first few weeks. A mixture of feeling hormonal and the fact that we don't know any other children with this name. Am really, really glad we chose it now that as it suits her so well.

littlerats Tue 30-Nov-10 15:10:25

DS didn't have a name for 5 days, in the end I booked a registration session at the registrars in order to make me choose. we were still debating on the way there, and he ended us as "dylan" being the name we both least disliked. i'm still not sure about it two years later, i think I should have left it longer.

thereisalightanditnevergoesout Tue 30-Nov-10 21:38:11

Did you get pestered by family/relatives? I'm not too sure if I'll manage to bite my tongue if that happens. I know what you mean about a name you dislike least, though.

And I'm getting a bit fed up with people saying, 'it's's your fourth, you've probably run out of names'. If it was only my second and a boy, I'd still have no clue.

magbags Tue 30-Nov-10 21:46:39

Take as long as you need, I felt I HAD to decide before ds arrived. I ended up changing his name when he was 2 months old as I regretted the rushed / under pressure choice we made. We kept the original name as a middle name. Good luck and follow your heart!

Lonnie Tue 30-Nov-10 23:48:20

We never had a name picked out just waited for the baby to arrive and see what he or she felt like when we named our son several people disliked it now most like it (aka got used to it)

threeinthebed Wed 01-Dec-10 02:28:04

I did the same as magbags, except I waited until DS was 5 months old before changing his name. We also kept the original name as a middle name. I too felt under pressure to decide on a name so agreed to DH's choice, even though I wasn't really keen on it. Take your time if you need to - I wish I had. Everyone else can wait for as long as it takes for you to decide

mathanxiety Wed 01-Dec-10 15:21:38

First and middle names picked out for the first three whether they turned out to be boys or girls, then for the fourth, both first name and mn were chosen but on the way to the hosp we occupied our time choosing a different mn if a girl and still, ehem, 'discussing' exH's ridiculous preference for a boy's first name, though the boy mn was sorted. With DC5, her first name was chosen in advance and I picked her mn in the hospital after she was born.

NinkyNonker Wed 01-Dec-10 20:57:15

Nope. We had 3 we liked and one we leant towards. We decided when she appeared, but didn't discuss names with anyone until we announced her birth/name.

thereisalightanditnevergoesout Thu 02-Dec-10 00:33:26

You see - you did the right thing there 'didn't discuss names with anyone until we announced her birth/name'.

When will I learn?

mathanxiety - we'd got middle names picked too with the first 3.

Sadly not to be, this time round.

lowrib Thu 02-Dec-10 01:59:47

We agreed DS's name when he was a day old. We hadn't decided by the time DS was born. I said I needed a day off from names and wasn't going to even try to name him on the day he was born.

A day later, it was just obvious what his name was (one from DP's list that I'd also picked out)

ChippingIn Thu 02-Dec-10 02:06:38

Take your time, tell people you will let them know when you have chosen a name. When they say you must have run out of names it being the 4th one, just smile and nod....

Your baby, your decision, don't be rushed into it.

Most everyone will understand if you snap and tell them to STFU about the baby's name.

Else tell them it's Horratio/Esmerelda - that should buy you a few days grin Even if you get a few cards with the name in it doesn't matter - it will be a good story for the baby when it grows up!

lowrib Thu 02-Dec-10 07:39:54

"tell them it's Horratio/Esmerelda - that should buy you a few days" brilliant idea! grin

Can we help with names at all? Would you like some suggestions? If you give us a few clues - e.g. whether you like classic / slightly unusual / way out there names / whether you have any cultural roots other than the UK etc etc.

We could give it a go anyway, what do you think?

sparkle12mar08 Thu 02-Dec-10 08:34:42

We didn't have names for either of ours. We had top three shortlists but ds1 was six days old before we named him, and ds2 was three weeks and a day! It's very important not to rush such an important decision, do not be bullied into it!

NinkyNonker Thu 02-Dec-10 09:57:34

Yes, it definitely made life easier! Her name has received a lot of compliments, but I doubt even our families would have been rude enough to insult her name when it had already been chosen. But then we didn't tell anyone the sex either.

thereisalightanditnevergoesout Thu 02-Dec-10 15:11:31

Oh, lowrib - I've been here since April thrashing out names - but keep coming up with problems.

The contender have been reduced to a shortlist of about 3 which are:

Patrick (but this means the first and surname would be exactly the same name as his cousin)
Angus (our cat's name)
and we quite like Theo - but I don't know if I like it enough.

Probably Angus is the main contender still - if I could get past the cat thing - & I made the mistake of discussing it with a close relative who didn't say anything (& normally she does) but who thinks we'll still 'pick Patrick yet' (obviously her favourite!).

So, my brain hurts and I'm a bit stressed with it all.

lowrib Thu 02-Dec-10 20:49:59

Lovely names, all three. FWIW I like Theo best, but I'm biased - it's my dad's name smile

If you've got three names to choose from, my best guess is you'll be alright if you wait until you're LO is born. Like everyone's saying don't rush it.

For me, with hindsight it was always obvious which name I'd choose - it was the only one on DP's list that I'd also come up with independently - but I didn't know this until after DS was born. And after he was born it was kind of obvious.

thereisalightanditnevergoesout Thu 02-Dec-10 20:52:48

Ah - thanks for the reassurance. It's just so very different from before - and as I'm obviously a bit of a control freak, it's making me feel a bit unsettled.

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