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help i'm being railroaded!

(18 Posts)
dairymum Sat 30-Oct-10 14:30:07

OH is determined to call new baby Jake Thomas. I don't like either of these names but he's got 2 dds onside and won't consider anything else. I'm willing t accept one of these names but would prefer compromise on other. I like Mathew and George, any thoughts?

GingerCursedEeeee Sat 30-Oct-10 14:31:57

I think your DH needs to accept that it is necessary to compromise! I also think that allowing your DDs an opinion complicates things even further - I know it was hard enough for DH and I to find a name we both really liked, let alone if we started asking other people what they thought!

rachel1970 Sat 30-Oct-10 14:40:57

I would definately keep your children out of the decision - they can name their own children one day! Regarding your dh and yourself, you will need to find a name you both love imo.

Personally I don't like Jake very much, but that shouldn't matter. You and dh need love your choice! I would keep looking.

wannabeglam Sat 30-Oct-10 14:46:02

If your DH is going through the 9 months of pregnancy and the childbirth, he can choose whatever name he likes :-)

Seriously though, none of us can impose names. I had to ditch loads of names I liked. Did you both choose the names of your previous children, or did your DH have to give in to your choices? That might make the situation a bit different.

My DS thought he'd have a say in the choice of our DD's name - told him Mum and Dad chose his name and we'd be choosing hers too. He didn't like our choice before she was born, but it wasn't an issue after.

3thumbedwitch Sat 30-Oct-10 14:49:24

they're all fairly straightforward names but the principle is more the point here - your DH needs to learn to compromise. Your DDs' thoughts aren't that relevant in comparison with yours - sounds like they're "ganging up" on you so I don't blame you for feeling railroaded and pissed off.

Tell him he can have one of his chosen names and you get to choose the other - and then MAKE SURE that you are the one that registers his names when he's born!

dairymum Sat 30-Oct-10 14:55:44

both need to be there when registering as we're not married.

alexisfaith Sat 30-Oct-10 14:55:59

Maybe you could point out that Jake is a nn for John and 'John Thomas' is American slang for penis? grin

alexisfaith Sat 30-Oct-10 14:56:33

Definitely persuade him to call the baby George. It's a fabulous name.

dairymum Sat 30-Oct-10 14:57:03

friend just called her new puppy George! gutted. Back to the books again sad

spidookly Sat 30-Oct-10 15:09:55

Well then you can register the baby without him if he's going to keep being a dick about it.

thereisalightanditnevergoesout Sat 30-Oct-10 16:55:39

Surely Jake is a nn for Jacob, not John, or have I been missing something? But then, if it helps your argument, go for it. It's not fair if either of you refuses to compromise - but seeing as you are doig all the hard work, I think you should get the ultimate vote.

Or you could cry... or make him promise just after labour?

MelinaM Sat 30-Oct-10 23:44:00

I agree with the other ladies, compromise is definitely the key here! I love George, not a fan of Jake- very popular here at the mo. Thomas is a lovely name too! Good luck, and keep us posted! x

NKinDXB Sun 31-Oct-10 07:11:29

It's not fair of him to impose his choice. You either need to choose one you both like or at least pick one name each.

We're nearing end of 9 months of debating and both made compromises on the way. I involved DS (4) and have let him pick a middle name - but obviously only because he made a suggestion I liked!!

Maybe you just need to get sneaky and work on changing the mind of your kids! Good luck.

diddl Sun 31-Oct-10 07:19:17

I like Jake, although not with Thomas.
Also like Matthew & George.

If you love George-why not still use it?

badcoverversion Sun 31-Oct-10 10:18:04

Jake has negative connotations here in the North West of England. It's considered quite a skally name and is also incredibly popular.

I always think of the Glaswegian 'Jakey' myself.

mathanxiety Mon 01-Nov-10 00:44:42

If my DCs had had their way, DD3 would have been called PomPom. Really, the DDs don't get a vote, and your DP needs to compromise. Have him come up with a list of 5 names and middle names and you do too.

I thought Jacob and James were the same name, not John (thought Jack was short for John).

mumtobe83 Sun 07-Nov-10 23:37:18

my thoughts are you sit down and tell him he can choose one of the names and work out the second one together. Remember you have to like the names too. If he chooses not to listen then tell him that you like neither and you will have to choose a name you both like, are you will choose one on your own.

saffy85 Mon 08-Nov-10 17:18:19

There is always room to compromise. He's being a bit unfair if you really hate both the names.

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