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Antenatal tests

Pregnant after TFMR for T21 and waiting harmony test results - handholding?

7 replies

Downbutnotyetout · 04/08/2017 01:07

We made the terrible decision to terminate for T21 in October last year. We had genetic testing done afterwards and neither myself or DH are carriers so it really was just one of those things. I am pregnant again and had the Harmony (NIPT) test done on Tuesday and have to wait 5-8 days for the results. I'm a mess. I keep replaying the phone call from last time in my head and reliving the whole experience. I just don't think I can do that again. I am so scared that there will be something wrong with this baby as well. I'm not sure how I am going to last the next week of waiting. Any suggestions or advice on how to manage this waiting period would be gratefully received, thank you ladies.

OP posts:
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Jessybear90 · 04/08/2017 16:43

Hi OP,

Poor you. I really do understand where you are coming from. I was in a similar situation to you waiting on T21 results from NIPT and I would have wanted to keep and OH wanted to terminate to for a full 7 days I was deciding in my own mind, and thinking I'd end up having to choose between him or the baby. Worst week of my life.

Have you had the screening? If so what was your results?

Best advice would be don't stay indoors because you will end up depressed. Keep to your routine and get out of the house I matter how hard it seems, simply because the days go faster. Tire yourself out through the day so you can go to sleep early at night and try to sleep in on a morning. This will also make the days shorter. I had my family around me and we did long day trips where I offered to drive there and back and this tired me out.

Changes are everything will be fine however I do get what you're saying about the anxiety of that phone call. When I had mine I could barely breath. I wouldn't wish it ok my worst enemy.

I'm positive for you that you're going to fine SmileFlowers

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batfish · 12/08/2017 12:38

Hi, we also had a TFMR for the same reason in April and I got a BFP again yesterday and I'm shitting myself too so know just how you feel. I can remember every word the doctor said to me and exactly how devastated and sick I felt when he called to tell me our results and although we won't be able to have the test for a few weeks I already feel sick at the thought of the wait for results.

I would just say try to keep busy - plan things with friends and family, do whatever relaxes you whether it is reading, swimming, listening to music. And tell yourself that it is going to be OK this time. I won't say it can't happen again because we all know it can but it would be really bloody unlucky. I really hope this time passes quickly for you and that you have happy news soon, you are not alone with these feelings.

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UnderTheF1oorboards · 12/08/2017 15:20

T21 isn't a disease and you can't be a carrier for it. Sorry you didn't get decent medical advice.

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ChickenBhuna · 12/08/2017 15:26

I understand OP.

We had a tfmr for spina bifida last year (diagnosed visually at the anomaly scan) and this year had to wait until weeks 15-20 this pregnancy to have confirmation that our baby is healthy.

It's not easy but just keep positive and keep busy OP. Let us know how you get on , we'll all be thinking of you I'm sure Flowers

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SleepFreeZone · 12/08/2017 15:28

I have my Harmony booked for tomorrow. Hand hold for you here 💐💐

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fempsych · 14/08/2017 21:06

Hand holding here. I was about to have a TMFR last Novemeber but baby had already died the day before. I have now found out I am pregnant again (6 + 4) so will be in your place in 4 weeks.. it's a horrible feeling x

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batfish · 20/08/2017 19:59

fempsych I'm sorry that must have been awful. When we got our results and were trying to decide what to do I actually wished to miscarry as wanted the decision to be taken away from me - and I hated myself for thinking it. But for that to happen must have really been devastating and I'm sure it didn't feel like the easier way out at all. Everything crossed for a healthy pregnancy this time for you

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