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(34 Posts)
PloddingOnOn Mon 17-Oct-11 12:22:18

I had a myomectomy surgery for fibroids in November 2008 at the age of 27.
I am 29 years old and getting married in November. We are hoping to fall pregnant soon.

I am TERRIFIED of natural birth - from the myomectomy (the scar is about 15cm long) and from a psychological perspective. I have never wanted to give natural birth - aside from years of sexual abuse, the thought of it literally terrifies me in all aspects.

Any advice? This is a terrible fear for me - I would actually not have a child if I were forced to give natural birth. What are the chances that I could choose a caesarian birth?

manitz Mon 17-Oct-11 20:20:37

i dont know for sure but i think they would let you have one. Perhaps you could discuss the issues with your gp before getting pregnant.

I think they would listen to your fears and discuss previous surgery but generally they do what is best for you and your child and I'm not sure what that would mean for you.

It is terrifying anyway even without the psychological and physical issues you have but for what it's worth i found that the hormones take over towards the end of pregnancy and make it much less terrifying at that point. I have had two elective sections, one emergency and a natural birth (as well as two natural births for early babies in pregnancies i terminated). I have to say that generally recovery was better for the natural births but that c sections are ok and much more controllable. Sorry if that's not much help but I hope your gp can help you x

thisisyesterday Mon 17-Oct-11 20:24:38

i think in your situation then they would take your concerns very seriously, and it's likely you would be able to have a c-section.

from a practical viewpoint of course a c-section is not as good for mum or baby as a vaginal delivery and it may be worth you seeking some form of therapy or counselling to come to terms with your fear.
if nothing else that would give you a real choice in how you give birth, which is, IMO, pretty important.

BikeRunSki Mon 17-Oct-11 20:27:51

I have a friend who lost her first child due to complications during the (vaginal) birth. Her subsequent children have been born by elective cs, recommended by her psychologist/counsellor. I understand that there is a recognised psycological condition of "fear of vaginal birth" which should be considered in all pros/cons for a c section.

thisisyesterday Mon 17-Oct-11 21:10:22

mmm it has a name and i can't think what it is, but definitely recognised.

i also have a friend who lost her baby and has already been told that should she conceive again she will be able to have a c-section

catsareevil Mon 17-Oct-11 21:13:05

If you have the money to pay for a CS privately then you will be able to choose to have one regardless of whether it would be clinically indicated.

Lulumama Mon 17-Oct-11 21:17:36

tokophobia is fear of childbirth, it is a recognised phobia and there is no reason that you couldn't have a planned section within the NHS.

thisisyesterday Mon 17-Oct-11 21:33:39

cats i am pretty sure that is not actually true. because i remember a couple of posts by people on here moaning that even though they were paying privately they couldn't demand a c-section

your consultant wants what is best for you and your baby, and if they feel that is a vaginal delivery they do not have to do a c-section, regardless of whether you are paying for it or not

catsareevil Mon 17-Oct-11 21:42:59

Really? I think that some medical insurance schemes wont cover maternal request sections, but if you are paying with your own money why would you opt to pay a surgeon who wouldnt do the procedure that you want?

EdithWeston Mon 17-Oct-11 21:44:56

Provision of c-section in these circumstances on the NHS is not a certainty.

If you want to be sure, you will need to arrange it privately.

thisisyesterday Mon 17-Oct-11 22:03:40

i think you would have to question potential surgeons very carefully about it.
it's MAJOR surgery, and they have to try and ensure the best outcome for mum and baby which means they won't necessarily do it just because you want it.

as I say, I've seen a few posts on here by people who have assumed that by paying privately they will be allowed to choose a c-section and it then hasn't been the case.

thisisyesterday Mon 17-Oct-11 22:04:21

presumaly because you are paying someone to deliver your baby, not specifically to carry out a risky surgery on you.

to clarify though, I think the OP has good grounds for getting a c-section regardless of whether she pays or not.

schmee Mon 17-Oct-11 22:10:30

You need to talk to your GP in advance of getting pregnant and ask for a referral for counselling. When you have your booking appointment after you get pregnant you need to discuss this with the midwife, provide any supporting evidence of your tokophobia and ask for help in finding the best consultant to help you.

Many consultants do not take tokophobia seriously, so you should be prepared to pay if you can't get the treatment you deserve on the NHS. You will be able to find a private consultant who is supportive of you having a c-section.

Please be aware though that you may be asked to have internal exams during your pregnancy and you may want to have a think about how you would handle these if it arose.

Good luck and congratulations on your forthcoming nuptials!!

EdithWeston Mon 17-Oct-11 22:22:06

Whether or not people here think there are "good grounds", this is not an area where you can say with certainty that every NHS region/trust/hospital/firm would do this. It is unfair and wrong to suggest that you can definitely get a c-section on NHS for this.

PloddingOnOn Tue 18-Oct-11 13:28:34

Shew thanks for the responses. We are going to save up in case we can't get the NHS c-section

Also, it's not just psychology

I had a myomectomy - which is the same surgery as a c-section and I have the same cut along my stomach. I would also worry about the risks involved in natural birth with the scar. I liked that surgery - and I had the "invasive" scans. I battled with those but there you go. I suppose do enough of those and I am okay-ish with the scans now

catsareevil Tue 18-Oct-11 13:33:39

The Portland Hospital website makes a distinction between 'medical' and 'elective' sections which makes me think that my 'elective' they mean maternal request.
There is a price list on there too, if you wanted an idea of costing.

PloddingOnOn Tue 18-Oct-11 13:38:44

Oh and I have emailed some hospitals who have sent prices for opting to have a c-section so I guess there wouldn't be an issue if they have sent me quotes already?

You guys are fab - thanks smile

EdithWeston Tue 18-Oct-11 19:05:35

I really hope you find a team who will inspire confidence in you throughout pregnancy and delivery.

Scary as it seems now, don't write off any delivery options yet. I can see you wouldn't contemplate pregnancy without finding in advance a way to secure a c-section. But do also research idc all the possibilities - holistic mid-wife led care might be something to consider too.

catsareevil Tue 18-Oct-11 19:51:54

You might be surprised how you feel when you do get pregnant. I know a few people who have changed from wanting a CS before to wanting a VB. But if at the moment you need that the certainty of a guaranteed CS then its good to have that. smile

schmee Tue 18-Oct-11 20:29:11

I can understand asking the OP to keep an open mind, but I don't see why she should. She may not change her mind during pregnancy and it's a bit bloody late then. Having spent most of my pregnancy being bullied by people who thought I should have some road to Damascus conversion, I feel a little bit protective towards the OP on this.

EdithWeston Tue 18-Oct-11 20:30:18

schmee - you have misunderstood.

schmee Tue 18-Oct-11 20:35:37

EdithWeston - your post was sensitively worded, and I can see the value of a holistic midwife led approach. It was more catsareevil's post that reminded me of some of the attitudes I've encountered.

catsareevil Tue 18-Oct-11 20:36:22

She doesnt have to keep an open mind. If she can guarantee herself a private section then she can have either option (if a VB would be safe for her given her medical history). She can opt out of a CS anytime she likes, so it is hardly restricting her options.

schmee Tue 18-Oct-11 20:40:03

Now catsareevil - you have misunderstood.

catsareevil Tue 18-Oct-11 20:41:00

That was posted before I saw your second post. You have completely misinterpreted my attitude. I was saying that I have seen people change their minds about what they want because that is the case. If the OP is able to access a private CS to guarantee herself that option if she wants it then that is great, and keeps all options open. I dont think she should have a 'road to damascus conversion'. hmm

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