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Scared Silly

(12 Posts)
Rachyabbadabbadoo Mon 05-Sep-11 13:46:20

I was feeling fairly optimistic after the 12 week scan (which turned out to be a 13 week one!) after finding the nuchal measurements were normal (2.1mm). Had the blood tests done and wasn't too worried until I received "that phone call" from the midwife with my risk as 1:75, caused by high HCG (4.43) and my age (think I have heard "my age" mentioned more in the last few weeks as I have in my whole life!). PAPP A was OK, infact higher at 1.85. We have booked an amnio next week, but I am just terrified about what to do if the result is positive. I've stopped thinking about my bump and the future and can only drag myself throug each day waiting. The counsellor at the hospital was great, but all I can think about is someone has to be unlucky, and that tends to be me. Partner is being fab and v supportive, but I'm lying awake at night, heart pounding and worrying about "what ifs". I did think I'd go ahead with the pregnancy whatever, but now I'm just scared. Any advice (apart from to get a grip!?!).

manitz Mon 05-Sep-11 14:07:26

hi, i've been there though it was far more certain there was a problem. 1:75 is a high risk and you need to make sure you are tested fully to find out why it is so high but it does mean you have 74 chances of everything being ok. I think I would also shut down in your position.

In both cases I did get bad news - but as I said it was certain from the first scan there were problems - and I went through with terminations. the waiting and not knowing are definitely the hardest part, hopefully you wont need to make any decisions and everything will be ok but if you do have to you will have to take it stage by stage, I didn't know how I would react until it actually happened. I watched a lot of rubbish telly and ate chocolate and was generally self indulgent whilst I waited for tests and results.

I had cvs which I think is very similar to amnio. Afterwards you will need a day off work to recover and rest and a lift home from the hospital. I was really upset as they scan when they put the needle in (and i didn't want to see the baby) so you could request to not see the scan, they can turn the monitor round.

one of my babies had downs syndrome and I found the downs association website very helpful when I wanted to know more about the syndrome. Antenatal results and choices (google ARC) were also a great support during the process and helped to explain things.

I hope you are one of the 74. x

mummytoh1 Mon 05-Sep-11 15:49:01

It's do hard isn't it. I had a 1:15 risk with DS2 and was absolutely terrified and like you struggled to get through the day.

If you need to know then having a cvs or amnio is the way forward, as already said it is the waiting and uncertainty which are the hardest parts.

Put another way, 1:75 is less than a 2% chance of a problem so the odds are stacked in your favour. Just try and pass the time any way you can.

By the way I got the all clear and my second son is 4 months old now and healthy. :-)

misty0 Mon 05-Sep-11 16:14:29

This IS the hardest part. Once you have your results you can begin celebrating or coming to a decision. I do hope all will be well for you, and, as has been said above, when it comes right down to rolls of the dice 1:75 is good odds.

I was unlucky. But like manitz's experience, my scan and bloods gave a much worse outlook. 1:3 of DS. I too had CVS (similar to amnio) and found the proceedure very bareable, so dont be afraid of that <hugs>

Chat to us here if it helps, while you are waiting. Personaly, even though i had bad news and have gone through a termination and all the heartbreak associated with it, i can say that the worst part is the waiting and not knowing ... so we all sympathise rachy and will gladly hand hold with you through this xxx

Alikersh Tue 06-Sep-11 12:40:15

Hi, no advice for you, just sympathy as I'm in almost exactly the same position as you. My risk is 1 in 100 and my amnio is on Thursday. Sounds like you're getting good support from everyone involved.
Hope all goes well for you xx

EggletinaClock Tue 06-Sep-11 13:43:38

Just to say that 1/100 and 1/75 are 'high' risk relatively but the odds are still very much in your favour.

However, the waiting is an appalling experience and I know a lot of us regulars here agree that despite what happened afterwards, nothing is as tortuous as the not knowing. Try to find mindless tasks to occupy you and support from others is very helpful. Come on here and vent too as it can be helpful to talk to people who've been there.

Love to you both though, it's a horrible time.
x

Alikersh Thu 08-Sep-11 12:07:19

Hi again, just thought I'd let you know how mine went.
Came back from the hospital earlier today and all went well. It's not as painful as your imagination makes you think (tip, don't look at the needle before it goes in!) It went very quickly, the consultant managed it in about 15 minutes as it took 3 goes to get through and had half an hour on the day ward just to be safe. Am feeling ok, had a little cry when it was all over & felt much better for it. My stomach muscles are quite sore at the mo but in general feeling ok enough to do the school run this afternoon
Results come through on Monday so have all my fingers & toes crossed but strangely I'm feeling better about the whole thing already! Hope yours goes well.
Will be thinking about you xx

misty0 Thu 08-Sep-11 19:41:51

Hi alikersh - glad to hear you got through today with no problems. Everything crossed here for Monday then - let us know how you get on hun.

CVS/amnio is not as bad as you imagine its it. I remember lying on the bed with my eyes closed waiting for them to begin my CVS and managing (while gripping OH's hand like a mad woman) to relax quite well. Even managed to breath! Then the doctor said loudly to her assistant "pass me the needle please?" and that was the end of my relaxed state!

Anyway - how is it going rachy? Not too long to wait now. I hope you're managing to cope and relax a little through this. What day is your procedure next week?

xx

misty0 Thu 08-Sep-11 19:44:06

Just thinking alikersh - make sure you dont over do things. I thought you were meant to have complete rest for the day?

xx

rhetorician Thu 08-Sep-11 21:47:43

yes, another one who has been there and done that - very similar situation - high HcG, normal pappa, less than wonderful nuchal fold, age related risk - added up to 1:11 for Down Syndrome - we had a cvs, a tough rollercoaster of a wait, and are expecting a chromosomally normal DD in 12 weeks' time. No anomalies of any kind detected at scans at 20 and 24 weeks. Sometimes the numbers are just bad. Fingers crossed for both of you - do let us know how you get on

purcellfan Fri 09-Sep-11 10:45:21

Also here, 1:19 for Downs, cvs clear. Still might be some heart stuff but we hope it will be minor if at all. Lots of positive stories on here...

RockyRoads Sat 17-Sep-11 20:57:25

Me too: 1:3 for Downs etc, CVS clear. Waiting for heart echo/abnormality scan. The waiting is horrendous but be reasuured that you're not alone and that, as purcellfan says, there are lots of positive stories here. Let us know how you get on

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