crap news at 20 week scan

[emilygrace1]

I had my 20week scan a month ago which has finally lead to a range of problems tht face my baby.
There is a 60% chance of moderate-severe learning disability and would need life long care, there is also quite a high chance of autisum sepctrum disorders and a high chance of epilepsy. they have given me the option to end the pregnancy. My main concern is how we would cope plus is have other children who i have to consider if we had a disabled child. We are gutted and over half way through the pregnancy :( Am at a total loss as what to do and how to come to a decision.
Any opinions would be greatly appreciated and if anyone has been through similar experiece then what factors helped you to come to your decision weather it was to continue or end the pregnancy.

[grumpypants]

I had no idea they could screen for asd or epilepsy. Is that as part of a syndrome they have identified? We had rubbish news at our 24 wk scan, and now have a child we adore, but I think you need better advice than mine - hopefully someone more knowledgeable will come along.

[lucy101]

I feel for you, this is dreadful news for anyone to receive (and the agony of will they be ok/won't they, is in a way worse than if it was cut and dried that your baby wouldn't survive for instance).

You have an awful lot to think about. Have you been in touch with ARC:

www.arc-uk.org

this is exactly what they were set up for. You can just ring them and speak to them. They were a godsend for me.

Also, you might want to think about getting a second opinion. I highly recommend the FMC:

www.fetalmedicine.com/fmc/

as they are so experienced and their scanning equipment better than some hospitals.

I don't know what they think is wrong with your baby (could it ventriculomegaly?) but perhaps if you post with the possible diagnosis other people might be able to offer some specific insight.

[jaabaar]

oh how difficult. I was in this position. Nobody can tell you what to do. Whatever decision you take must be the right one for you and your family.

I agree with above advise and second opinion. I had my tests done at the Fetalmedicine centre. They are very good, very understanding and give very good information.

Hugs x

[ErinH]

Can only sympathise with you, but can't help you make a decision.

I lost my baby last week to Edward's syndrome. All I can say is that I would have settled for anything if only I could have saved him.

I didn't have a difficult decision to make like you have and I can't imagine what that must be like. I think any decision must be made for your children and it can't be wrong.

My thoughts are with you. xx