Mental health is crashing down around me

[Namechangedtoscream]

I'm currently self certed from work and have said it's hyperemesis related but it's not it's my mental health.

Brief history: severe PND after baby #1 narrowly avoided hospitalization with that one. Several years later and I have 5 miscarriages in 5 years leading to where I am now 13+ weeks into pregnancy #7

I feel like I've made a huge mistake. That I was just getting my life back together from #1 and had resolved myself after the last miscarriage that I was going to have no more. Then this baby miracle has stuck. But all I can think about is how I don't want them. I'm becoming increasingly withdrawn and snappy and don't want to engage with anyone or anything.

I'm at a routine consultant appointment tomorrow I guess to see if I am high risk or not due to other health issues. Do I tell them I'm feeling like this? Do I tell DH? Will they call social services on me?

[BlueRainyDays]

They absolutely won't call SS on you!
They will refer you to metal health team.
Lots of people have felt the way you do, including me.
Please do talk to your DH and your midwife!