PND and aggression(3 Posts)
Hi, I'm not really sure where to start with this but I'm a FTM to a beautiful 4 week old girl.
I had a very long labour (about 3 days) before finally having an emergency section. I lost a lot of blood so had to have a transfusion. My daughter was fine during labour but it was so exhausting for me, and my blood pressure was extremely high. Everything normal now, stitches healing, bp normal.
I just don't feel normal. I suffer from depression anyway (was on Citalopram when I got pregnant, then changed to Fluoxetine, and still on it) and the pregnancy wasn't always easy. I love my daughter unreservedly and don't have any aggression towards her.
Obviously my partner and I are suffering from tiredness, especially as our daughter is becoming clingy in the last few days and doesn't want to sleep in her cot. But when my partner says something slightly insensitive, I tend to get very aggressive with him and argue. It's happened the last three nights where I've just told him to fuck off. He doesn't though, he dotes on our daughter and would do anything for her. He does tell me how proud he is and I'm doing a good job, but some days I don't feel it.
He lashes out when I do, and says I sit in doors all day watching TV but I don't, I try to go out once a day with my baby, for both our sanity. I do everything for her, but when evening comes, my energy levels and patience are low.I've never done anything to hurt her and I never would, I just feel I can't cope.
Maybe I'm too sensitive and I shouldn't get so annoyed with my partner, but when he says things that hurt, I can't help but feel rubbish. I do everything for my daughter, and that's all I can do. He says I need to 'do more for yourself', but I don't understand. I only have enough strength to do stuff for one person and that's my daughter. Surely that's the right thing to do?
I don't really know why I'm posting, I guess I just need to get it out. Some days, I'm afraid to leave the house, but I try.
I am 27 weeks pregnant with my third child and am suffering very badly with depression I felt like it has taken o we my life and I am not sure who I am anymore. I find it hard to go out I have shut myself off from nearly everyone as I find that no one can understand how I feel, and I am happy to be pregnant even tho unplanned but I am not sure. I don't know how you can get your partner to understand as I am struggling with the same issue most of the time he is very supportive but the times where he slightly questions me it feels like the end of the world and I am no good. It's a continuous emotional roller coaster. If you feel you have the strength maybe look at couples therapy.
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