Hello, it's 2.21am and I'm sat sobbing uncontrollably. I don't know what to do anymore. I have a 4 month old son who I love dearly but he doesn't sleep through and I am so tired. I went to the dr on new years eve and was diagnosed with mild PND. I'm breastfeeding so can't have any tablets but the dr was arranging some support for me with the health visitors. Since then me and my husband have been attempting some sleep training for our son. The first night was horrendous and resulted in me screaming at my son, since then we have remained consistant and followed the sleep lady's technique. It has been difficult though, our son requires alot of soothing to fall asleep, he wakes 2 hourly and can't fall back to sleep because he rubs his eyes. We were swaddleing him but that just distresses him and it takes a while to calm him back down. Basically it seems the techniques don't work for him. I thought we were getting somewhere last night as he settled by himself and we managed to drop his feeds to 1. He was still waking but was settling well but tonight has been a nightmare, hence I'm up and wishing I was dead.
I just feel like a massive failure, I'm not enjoying being a mummy. I don't feel like myself anymore and I'm so scared that I'm going to hurt my baby. I really need some advice, support and someone who can genuinely promise there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Should I give up the sleep training until I'm better and let my son sleep with me again? (we started co sleeping because he wouldn't settle in his basket) I don't want to waste our hard work for it to be even harder later.
Please, please someone tell me what to do! :'(
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Antenatal/postnatal depression
I feel like a failure
12 replies
kirstywade82 · 07/01/2014 02:36
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