if I tell my GP the truth will they send social services round??(7 Posts)
So, DS is almost 11mo and I think I may have a touch of PND. I'm basically ALWAYS on the edge of rage at everything. Things that used to not phase me - like DS being woken from a nap by the postman, or refusing to go down in his cot so I have to push him in the buggy, or leaking nappies when I'm late leaving the house, or endless dishes and laundry and cleaning up after food, or constantly waking and crying at night - now make me want to scream/punch the wall/cry. I hate feeling like this. I'm just always angry and feel like I can't get anything right.
When I feel particularly bad, and say DS won't nap - which we all know is a crime ;-) - and is trying instead to play with my hair or crawl off my knee, rather than just think, Oh I'll try again in 5/10 mins, I sometimes have these vivid images of throwing him onto the floor, or shaking him even as I'm just so annoyed at him.
I want to go to the GP about it as I hate feeling like this and its no fun. Anyway - my question is this. I imagine the GP will ask something along the lines of "do you ever think about harming yourself or your baby?" much as the HV did at the maternal mood assessment. Now I can't say in all honestly that I haven't had these thoughts, but am worried that if I tell the truth, the GP will send someone round to take my baby away :-((
Should I just leave that bit out? Even if its these thoughts in particular that I find so distressing and worrying?
It is the people who are not seeking help, and not being honest with themselves that are in the most danger,
You are doing the right things, you are being objective, and seeking help.
If you embrace that help they will be totally satisfied that you are safe.
If it ever does feel like you are going to crack,
Put baby in cot, shut door, go in another room shut door, put head phones on play music, have a cup of tea (cigarette), and take as long as you need to feel calm again. ring a friend or family person if you want.
Baby will be safe in cot, so just do that rather than lose the plot.
mum was a social worker, in the run up to me having my first she had a few tragic shaken baby cases, it put the fear into her, as all were people who had been scared to admit to themselves or anyone they needed support,
she kept telling me, everyone has moments where they feel overwhelmed, and to do the above if needed,
I think just knowing that was an option in a difficult situation really helped, and when I had those moments with babies where I was at my wits end, I knew if it got worse I could do the above.
Please ask for some support, it normal to need or want it.
No love, they won't take your baby.
What they will do is probably look at getting you on some temporary medication, and give you extra support.
Please reach out to someone, you are a good Mum xx
Even if they did contact social services it would be with a view to supporting you, not to take your baby so even your worst case scenario isn't too bad. It's unlikely that the gp would contact them. You can't carry on feeling like this, getting the help you need makes you a great mum.
If you tell the truth, you will get the help and support that you need. Just say "yes I have thought about harming my baby in times of desperation and I would never act on those thoughts but the thoughts themselves scare me, which is why I am here seeking help"or similar
Agree totally with what other's have said, just ask the GP or seek friends / family that can give you a bit of a break as it sounds like you need one..
I know that whilst many found the early months the hardest with a newborn, I think I found things harder around a similar time to you..
Almost like 11 months of broken sleep caught up with me or something was happening with my hormones but certainly recall a couple of bleak moments.
I breast fed till about 9 months and periods returned from memory so perhaps it was hormonal, but don't feel worried about asking for help.
I've no advice but wanted to wish you all the best. You're very brave admitting how you feel & I'm sure your GP will help. Good luck & be kind to yourself.
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