Feel bloody worse now, just did a long post and it got lost - argh!
I'm basically feeling 'off' DD is 6 months, feel tired and have little interest in getting out and about like I used to and nothing makes me feel good, it's come on quite quickly and I've had depression before so always look for the signs and have had the following worrying ones:
DD doesn't like/love me/I can't settle her like DH I'm a rubbish/lazy mum I'm fat and ugly and don't want people to look at me in public, think I come across as very self conscious in shops etc Being fake jokey/happy with DH but not feeling it Getting very anxious about DDs future will she be happy etc and basics like how I'll cope with her (toddler tantrums etc)
I keep thinking of the phrase 'this too shall pass' like a mantra, I do not want to slide into something worse. Also horrified at mentioning to DH as he's been through it with me before and it's hard on him too, he'll prob think, here we go again.....
My house is a mess, I hardly cook anymore and little things feel like a mountain to climb
Also, DH wanted to dtd last night and I just felt sick at the thought, could not even have tried, would have cried I think. Hate my boobs and stomach (and they are bad trust me - I'm not one of these people who say that and you look at them and think there's nothing wrong)
Anyway, I'm rambling, can any of you lovely ladies advise?
I could Yoni but I almost don't want to open that can of worms (plus we're trying to get life insurance and they wouldn't bloody insure me because I had a pregnancy related migraine, so god knows what they'd make of this!) I realise that's the wrong way to look at it.
Also, I had counselling at the docs about 3 years back and it wasn't a great experience, I looked over at the counsellor while talking and he was zoned out and totally bored, shattered my confidence even more!
I feel like I should just keep an eye on myself as docs feels like last resort.