How do you deal with anxiety ?

[3plus2]

I have a meeting at work next week and I'm totally terrified ! I keep thinking they are going to sack me or something even tho it's just about some changes the company are doing I keep convincing myself it's all negatives. I've been feeling sick since he called and now it keeps coming into my head then I feel sick :(

[racingheart]

Have you read Feel the Fear? I really recommend it. If you can, get hold of a copy and read it before the meeting. It's a lovely, gentle, very clever book on how to deal with anxiety.

If you don't get hold of it, the key exercise in it is: Just imagine the worst that could happen - they sack you. You leave. Unlikely but possible. Think of different ways you can choose to handle that outcome.

You can choose to use the time to make positive changes in your life, to look for new work, or retrain, to set up a company of your own, enjoy being with your family growing up or fight for unfair dismissal. You have lots of options. you are in control of your response to worst case scenarios.

Go in assuming all will be well. Try to get there early, lock yourself in a loo and breathe deeply and slowly, saying the word 'Calm' in your head, over and over. That's a very useful trick I learned from a hypnotherapist and it works. Don't drink coffee or anything that will make you jumpy, wear soft clothes you feel comfortable and smart in, and plan something for straight after work that you really want to do, even if it's just buying cakes for tea, or going for a swim, so you have something to look forward to.

[3plus2]

I'm getting really hot and panicky thinking about it I really really don't think I can go

[racingheart]

If it's that bad, then call in sick, because you are sick. And see a GP about the anxiety. You might have hormone imbalance after birth that is causing MH problems.

[racingheart]

Sorry, that last post came out wrong. Was interrupted by DC. I mean, you won't be lying about calling in sick. It sounds like you have a genuinely debilitating illness that needs to be diagnosed and treated. Very good luck.

[3plus2]

Hello an update had my meeting and it was fine ! I was nrly sick before as I was terrified but I did it and so proud of myself :)

[BlueyDragon]

Good news, 3plus! Anxiety is a horrible thing, do think about getting some help to handle it, whether through the book recommended above or via your GP. I have the same problem and for me some counselling helped me understand when the anxiety was building to a state I couldn't handle, so that I could handle it - mostly by knowing I was overreacting! Sounds silly, but I never realised everyone else didn't go around with Armageddon going off in their head the whole time!

[3plus2]

Thank you bluey dragon I'm going to get the book the thought of talking to someone face to face scares me:0 and I hate it when I get txt messages saying need to talk to you and you say oh what for and they reply oh I tell u later , god it freaks me out! Makes me feel sick to the stomach cause think oh god have I said/done something !?

[3plus2]

I'm really not coping am I :(

[BlueyDragon]

You are doing just fine - you know there's something you need to work on and there's nothing to be scared of in that, honestly. Try the book, see if that helps. If it doesn't, try speaking to someone. Getting through the barrier is hard, but worth it. I cried in the doctor's office when he referred me, but my anxiety had spiralled into depression at that point and I had reached a point where I had to do something. I've not had a depressive episode since; I would hope you never get that low - keep being strong.