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November 2014- thread 4- 12 week scans and blooming in the second trimester!

(1000 Posts)
barmybunting Sun 27-Apr-14 12:04:55

Hi everyone, we have run out of posts on our last thread so hopefully we'll all find this one easily enough.

Here is to more positive 12 week scans and enjoying our second trimesters, all feeling more human hopefully!

alex7149 Sun 27-Apr-14 12:09:04

Heya smile

Venus in reply to your message on the other thread I am also short of breath and have been since early on. It's to do with the baby needing you to take in extra oxygen apparently and probably isn't helped by my blocked up nose which started quite early (although what I thought was hay fever looks like a sinus infection today -.- TMI- blew my nose and out came brown snot and blood).

I love wearing bump hugging tops, but still haven't told everyone as want to tell the kids first, so getting grumpy when I have to cover up :P

itsjustthursday Sun 27-Apr-14 12:25:52

Thanks barmy! I genuinely went 'noooo!' when I reached the end and it said the thread wasn't accepting more messages... blush Silly lady...

Tigsy The Pushchairs board is here and the Pushchairs reviews section is here. I agree with Anna, it's easier to search for specific names and get the reviews. However if you have no idea where to start then have a look at the Mumsnet Best in the reviews section (they'll be right at the top), they're the ones people have left the most positive reviews for and it helps to get a feel for what makes most people call a pushchair good! I did that when I was starting out, to try and get my head around things, and it did help. I agree though, the site is massive and overwhelming! I spent my first year reading only AIBU and the information pages grin

Loaf shock Ok I'm not going to Homerton but... it was an option... (eek! I'm identifying myself!) Homerton is very good and my postpartum care will be done by Homerton MWs. Realistically I should probably go there, as it's close to me, but I am too attached to the last hospital I gave birth in, it was too good for me not to go back!

Venus I also get out of breath at this stage. But if it's any reassurance, it might pass. Last time around I had the same - first tri I was out of breath, easily light headed, weaker. Then in 2nd and 3rd tri I was back to some semblance of normality, went hill walking and up and down the stairs and walking for miles everywhere with no problems. So I'm hoping it's the same this time and that at some point within the next few weeks things will start to calm down and I won't feel so old!

WinterLover Sun 27-Apr-14 12:33:03

can't believe we're on thread 4 already! !

RandomInternetStranger Sun 27-Apr-14 13:19:33

Well that's it, I am officially in the wheelchair. After pushing it with too much walking Friday and then trying to keep up with DD yesterday I've been in bed since and in a lot of pain. It is not worth pushing it anymore and even round the house (downstairs) I'm in the chair now and if I need to go out anywhere I'm taking the chair, I'm not crippling myself for pride now. I'm going to hire a mobility scooter this week to make it even easier out and about, that's me done now. I don't mind really, would rather be in the chair and still getting about than sitting in not being able to go anywhere.

Weirdly the sore boobs and sickness has come back and I'm hungrier again now after a break for a couple of weeks. I am horribly out of breath all the time - I feel like a 90 year old who smokes 40 a day when it's the one time I'm not bloody smoking dammit! No fair! I was convinced it was a boy but now leaning more towards girl so I haven't a clue. Definitely doing a dating scan in a few weeks!!

Still really annoyed/upset by the postman's comments yesterday. It's had time to fester and sink in and realise all the implications and I am really really cross about it. Can not believe that someone who barely knows me can judge me to be that kind of person like that, and say it to my face! Why do people always have the worst impression of me?? I'm nice, kind, moral, good, intelligent, loyal, loving, I'm not some teenage slapper sponging chav, I'm bloody 37 years old, I'm not going into the ins and outs of my lifestyle but I definitely tick the middle class ok yah boxes. Who the hell does he think he is?? Not even my midwife has the right to ask me personal questions like that and if she did I'd be getting a new midwife - even my close friends, family and colleagues haven't dared ask or been so bloody rude about it. Last time I give him a Christmas bonus!

alex7149 Sun 27-Apr-14 13:28:35

Random I wouldn't worry- people are judgemental of any situation that they don't understand or is outside the realms of normality for them. The fact that you're managing fine as a single mum to dd doesn't seem make them realise that you'll be perfectly fine with a newborn too!
I think their concern is probably that the baby won't have a father- but how do they know that you don't have a secret boyfriend who doesn't live with you, not that you need one, plenty of men abandon children and they turn out ok, apart from abandonment issues- your child won't have that. I'm sure they will get a good male role model from your Dad and other male friends and family.
I try my best to be open minded to any situation in which no one is deliberately hurt, I don't see why other people have to care so much about things which don't affect them at all!

Northernexile Sun 27-Apr-14 13:30:06

Just want to echo what thursday is saying about a return of energy levels in the second and third trimester- I am short of breath and knackered at the moment, but I do remember it getting better. I did a 5 mile hike up a mountain on my due date last time in the hope it would get things moving (it didn't), and I felt great throughout most of the second/third trimester.

I have a feeling this one will also be a girl. Maybe because that's all I know I suppose. Tempted to find out this time, but will probably hold out for a surprise again.

I really feel for you random, SPD sounds a bitch! Hope it eases off for you.

RandomInternetStranger Sun 27-Apr-14 13:41:41

See the whole male role model thing - I do not know a single man who I think would be a good role model for a child. Not one man who is how I picture a real man to be - strong, kind, protective, provider, intelligent, loving husband, good father, truly believes in equality, selfless, confident, pulls his weight round the house, doesn't lie, cheat, sponge, get in fights, isn't arrogant, isn't either chauvinistic or a complete wuss and pushover, loves his mum but isn't a mummy's boy... I'm sure those men must exist somewhere but I've not known any, whether it's my Dad, ex husband, grandfather, male friends, none of them are who I would want influencing my child on what it means to be a man. I don't think there is anything a man could teach my son that I couldn't - whether it's shaving, sex or puberty or how to wear a tie, or whether it's how to treat women, get on in business or do car maintenance and DIY. I would give any child, boy or girl, the same upbringing and teach them the same things from needlework to wallpapering and I think it's a mother more than a father who teaches a boy how to be a man by what they accept and expect from the men around them and how they allow themselves to be treated. My dad is around, as are other male friends and family, so this one will have an influence in its life though not from partners, DD hasn't met any boyfriends in the last 4 years though there have been some, but I don't think it really a necessity. I'm not worried about it anyway. smile

itsjustthursday Sun 27-Apr-14 13:50:24

DH thinks it's a girl. I'm leaning that way but mainly because DH thinks it! He thought we were having a boy last time and we did, we didn't find out the sex at the scan so it was a guess all the way through. However I think we're about 95% certain that we'll be finding out this time. It's been on my mind, even though that scan isn't for another 10 weeks, but this time around it feels right. Odd, as I thought I'd always want to leave it until the birth, but it's just different. I feel like I can start telling DS a lot more about a little brother or sister, and start preparing ourselves too, if we know.

We went to a party and the kids were older than him, around 2yo - 3yo, he was the youngest at 16mo. The difference between him and them was so noticeable, he's a sweet intelligent thing and surprises me every day (he has started to bring me his sleeping bag when he's tired, I admit I went crazy gushing proud parent when he started doing that grin), but the other children understand a lot more when you speak to them, and have more defined personalities, as in wanting something and not wanting to share, for instance, whereas DS is still a bit oblivious - he sees something he likes, he goes for it, if you take it away he wanders off elsewhere, and he doesn't get frustrated if he can't get it, just finds something else. He was also the only kid more focused on the food than the fun, kept walking up to the table and grabbing olives and popcorn! So I think that by the time DC2 arrives we'll be dealing with a very different child - perhaps easier to communicate, but also perhaps more stubborn or frustrated confused

We're going to hire a cleaner. I'm not sure when, as I'd love one now really grin but the only reason I want one now is first tri tiredness and nausea means the kitchen is not ideal (not awful, DH is great, but not exactly how I want it) and the bathroom gets dealt with less (again it looks fine, but I really want the bath scrubbed but don't want to do it myself atm). Hopefully within the next few weeks things will settle down a bit and I'll return to normal action with housework and we will run more smoothly, but no way am I going to be doing it with a newborn. Ideally I want someone twice a week, to help stem the madness that I feel certain will descend on our home. I'm thinking maybe from 37 or 38 weeks until DC2 is at least 1mo or 2mo, depending on how it all goes. Also torn as to whether or not I should put DS in for childcare, he'll get 15 hours free from Jan 2015 but seeing as I'll be home anyway I can't decide if I want to send him out confused

Tigsy Sun 27-Apr-14 14:55:14

Phew.... found you all smile

itsjusthursday thanks for the links- will have a look once I'm feeling braver!

pinkgirlythoughts Sun 27-Apr-14 15:38:43

ooh, had a moment of panic when I saw the old thread was full!

Well, after thinking my sickness was easing off a bit in the last week or so, I've thrown up twice today sad last time was about half an hour ago, and I feel utterly crappy. Luckily DS is having a late nap, so I'm snuggled on the sofa with DH watching TV and mumsnetting til I feel more human again!

alex7149 Sun 27-Apr-14 16:06:30

I wish I could get a cleaner but I'd have to clean it all to make it presentable for the cleaner :P

I think it's a girl, so does dp after the scan, he was leaning towards boy before. Bicarbonate of soda test x2 indicates girl, nub theory says girl and so does side of implantation so we'll see smile

Amyrose82 Sun 27-Apr-14 16:18:30

Phew found you! Just marking my place for the moment... smile

Giraffeski Sun 27-Apr-14 16:19:22

Oh dear Random, my DP ticks all your boxes but he's mine!!!!
Stay away! wink

We have our scan on Tuesday, will be 12 weeks exactly. We won't be finding out sex at 20 week as we liked not knowing last time.
DP guessed all the way through that DD was a boy and was totally shocked when she wasn't!

We have told a few more people this week, friends etc. Still not told PIL but will be telling them on Tuesday after the scan I think.
My parents have known since I had the BFP!

Annarose2014 Sun 27-Apr-14 16:39:50

I desperately want to know the sex! Funny thing, I've always known I'd be someone who found out. I am staggered at the fortitude of people who leave it a suprise!

Also it means I only have to decide on one name. We are completely at square 1 with names for both boys and girls - it would be great to only have to think up one!

I have felt from the start "BOY". It alarmed me, as I definately wanted a girl - I have no brothers and went to a girls school so have zero experience of little boys. They frightened me!

But actually its been very helpful having this feeling as its forced me to look about at little boys in town and try to visualise it. I'm noticing for the first time how cool and funny they are. I now think a little boy would be the best thing ever, and now don't care what i have!

(Still think its a boy though....)

Hopeful83 Sun 27-Apr-14 16:42:24

Just marking my place. Have just got back from a hen weekend, managed to hide not drinking (I think, no one commented anyway) by carrying around a glass of wine all night and sneakily pouring small amounts away when no one was looking. Had the Harmony test on Friday, got a 1 in 11,815 chance for Down's syndrome on the NT which at 30 I was happy with. Have to wait 2 weeks for the Harmony results. We're going to find out the gender too. Eek! Not long to wait.

Thursday - thanks for posting the pram links, I am going to spend tonight beginning research I think.

Random - how rude of the postman! You should definitely complain, disgusting!

Some hope for all those people feeling rubbish - I was really tired and nauseous but now the tiredness is much less and the nausea only rare, I am 12+5, so hopefully you'll all start to feel better soon. Just got back from Bluewater though with new clothes in medium (usually a small) as I am really struggling to fit into my work clothes now. I don't look pregnant really, just fat. Hopefully I'll look more pregnant soon.

Petal26 Sun 27-Apr-14 16:44:03

itsjustthursday We will be sending DD to Nursery in January for the first time. She isn't 3 until the second week of the term so we will have to pay until she is eligible for the free hours after Easter.
It will be at the school where I work now so I know the set up and routine and I really think she is going to benefit socially as she is quite shy at the moment. I just hope she doesn't think we are 'sending her out of the house' or replacing her as it will only be 6 weeks after baby arrives (if all is well) so we are talking about going to school all of the time at the moment and will continue to.
I think I will need 2 days a week to grab half an hour here or there to myself as well while DC2 is having a quick nap (I can dream!)
DH has taken DD to the park for half an hour before tea so trying to catch up with Game of Thrones quickly, have been trying all week and it's not really a program I can watch with her around!

Hopeful83 Sun 27-Apr-14 16:44:53

Just realised that last comment sounds bad, obviously I don't look fat as I'm only a medium, but just fatter than I usually am. I meant that the weight gain seems all over rather than a bump. Think it's all the snacking I've done to keep the nausea at bay!

Polkadotscarf Sun 27-Apr-14 17:51:12

I had a cleaner at work ask me, in front of another cleaner, if I was pregnant as she'd heard rumours! I feel really shocked and cross that I was forced to say before I was ready and I know it was because she wanted gossip as she barely says hello usually. I have no reason to believe anything will go wrong now, I am 12 weeks and had a scan last week but still wanted to wait til the official twelve week scan. She wouldn't tell me who had be saying things. Just feel it's so rude to put so done on the spot like that! Grrr!

RandomInternetStranger Sun 27-Apr-14 18:13:04

Just spent my £200 John Lewis vouchers I won here and got pretty much everything I need for the baby! I'm pretty sorted now apart from clothes! smile

alex7149 Sun 27-Apr-14 18:17:53

Wow random - organised! Polka that's horrible of her, I wouldn't ask unless it was someone I was close to! It puts you in such an awkward position!

blamber Sun 27-Apr-14 18:32:50

I'm really looking forward to the shortness of breath and the tiredness disappearing! I'm hoping it will and feel better for reading everyone's experiences with this in previous pregnancies. I'm so exhausted and starting a new job tomorrow which involves quite a long commute. I'm dreading it sad.

StudyFullTime Sun 27-Apr-14 18:38:50

I've told everyone now, if it goes wrong then I know I'll have lots of support.

does anyone else have really sensitive teeth? Mine hurt when I eat, I have a dentist appointment soon so will ask then.

I can't believe how quickly this is all going, had blood tests done the other day and they came back clear so just waiting for 12 week scan next Thursday the 8th.

10 weeks 3 days today smile

Annarose2014 Sun 27-Apr-14 19:00:17

blamber I have a 50 minute commute and 13 hour days on my feet so I sympathise. Last night I wasn't home till 10.20. I honestly don't know any more which is pregnancy tiredness and which is hellish-schedule tiredness.

And I'm up on the first floor which is nothing normally but OMG the shortness of breath! Its like climbing Everest! grin And I can't really get the lift cos its a hospital and the porters make snidey sarky remarks if they see you using a hospital lift to go up one flight. And i don't have the energy for those Fuckers. angry

Chivesmum Sun 27-Apr-14 19:15:23

Ooo new thread! I kept clicking refresh on the old one and thought everyone was quiet blush

Feeling rubbish again here - thought the nausea had peaked but apparently not sad quite fed up again with it all.
One week to go to the magic 12 weeks so am I hoping all will be well after that!! Wishful thinking I think!!!

We've taken the side of DS's cot and he didn't get out at all last night smile such a relief - last time we tried was a nightmare so he clearly just wasnt ready

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