Advanced search

Would you like to be a member of our research panel? Join here - there's (nearly) always a great incentive offered for your views.

December 2013 - part 3

(1000 Posts)
Holly1977 Wed 05-Jun-13 14:06:11

Starting yet another thread as us chatterboxes have filled up 2 already!

Jucy, I'm so sorry to hear your news. Big hugs, wish there was something more I could say. flowers

Frouby, if you're feeling crap just fuck the housework off, I do! It'll keep.

I'm scared and excited in equal measures about the scan on Friday. Looking forward to seeing bean and being able to get on with things. But obviously scared of getting bad news like Jucy... 2 days, 1 hour and 50 minutes to go!

My friend has offered to be a birthing partner too. I may well take her up on it, I suspect she'll be more help than OH. And as I'm planning on having a home water birth and OH has already invited his bloody mum (!) think it'll be good to have a friend there. I'm not private at all, have zero issues with people seeing me naked (as my neighbours will tell you) and she's seen me throw up enough times from our party days (though never shit myself to be fair) that I'm not too fussed about that.

Futterby Tue 25-Jun-13 23:50:11

Comes and goes smile I started feeling mine very early (just before 12 weeks) and it was kind of like gas I suppose.

PistachioTruffle Wed 26-Jun-13 06:58:56

Mildred, that's fab! Remind me how many weeks you are now? I still haven't felt anything yet, absolutely cannot wait.

I'm SO tired at the minute, where's my second trimester energy burst?!

Congratulations to those finding out the sex!

violetbean Wed 26-Jun-13 08:23:27

Lady and others, hope work stress eases up soon, or at least that as the days count down to maternity, it all seems less difficult. thanks

I had my midwife appt yesterday and because I'm only 15 weeks she stressed that we might not be able to hear heartbeat, but we did! smile Was so excited.

She thinks I might have a uti, so sent off my urine sample to the lab. That would explain some of the extra tiredness and feelings of being a bit off-colour over the last few days! Expect results in a few days.

Going on a hen do this weekend, hopefully will feel a bit more perky by then so I can really enjoy it! grin

kyz1981 Wed 26-Jun-13 08:29:17

Mildred movement does come and go, some days I feel so much less movement than others, I have an anterior placenta so not feeling as much as I should- but the last two days I'm feeling much stronger movements and even a few tiny prods that I think are kicks.

I started to feel the bubbles at around 13 weeks and these got stronger until I started to feel prods.

I am 18 weeks tomorrow by Scan dates, so due end of Nov- but staying in this thread with all you lovely ladies.

Pistachio I'm still waiting for my energy too.

froubylou Wed 26-Jun-13 09:22:09

Morning all

I have my energy until about 10.30am. Which is a shame because by the time I've got home from the school run, had some breakfast and washed a few pots my energy is gone lol.

I intend to hoover my house today. I'm ashamed to admit that it has been 3 weeks since my upstairs saw the hoover. I am a slovenly housewife lol.

All those who are feeling stressed and upset over work, don't! Its just a job, in a few months you won't be there and you can only do so much to change things. As long as you do your role to the best of your ability that's all you can do.

I havent felt much movement for the last few days but I've got an Anterior Placenta too so putting it down to that growing and muffling things. Can't wait to feel them properly.

Off to scoff beans on toast. Yum. Been wanting beans for the last few days. So am having them for breakfast lol.

ccsays Wed 26-Jun-13 10:17:33

I'm the same froubylou, I'm fine till mid morning the could quite happily go another wee nap.

I'm seriously swithering about whether or not to find out the gender. Been looking at scans and they do one at sixteen weeks which means I could get one done next weekend and NRRRRRRRRRRGGGGHH the suspense is killing me! I don't think I can hold out till December! Did anyone who found out regret it?

TakingTheStairs Wed 26-Jun-13 10:18:10

Enjoy your beans frouby I had them for supper last night smile

kyz and pistachio your energy is on the way .. it must be! I haven't had an energy bullet, but I'm no longer falling asleep by 3pm so as far as I'm concerned that's a bonus.

Violet and weechops can I ask a silly question? Why do the midwives think you might not be able to hear the heart beat? Surely this late it's almost a guarantee? It is the type of equipment they use? (told you it was a silly question!)

froubylou Wed 26-Jun-13 11:43:05

Lovely beans takingthestairs. Half a can left and contemplating them for a lunch as well. Least they may ease some 'blockages' lol.

I think the reason they may not be able to find the heartbeat is because of the position of the baby and what they have to get through to hear it. My placenta is at the front to add to that a good layer of fat, and a baby the size of a lemon perhaps and its not a given they will find it. I'm telling myself that now ready for my 16 week appointment lol. Hopefully I will feel jesus moving around by then so shouldn't be too much of a worry and I should be able to point M/W in right direction.

CC, I am finding out this time. I didn't last time with D/D and was convinced I was having a boy. So when it was a girl I was a bit shocked to be honest. And all her first photos are in neutral clothes which is fine but it would have been nice to get some pink ones too. Plus I have a blue and a pink set of baby clothes waiting for me when I find out so at least I can collect them and see what I have and what I will need and the other set can be passed onto someone else.

I now have a cot as well. So thats cot, moses basket, bath, full set of clothes, neutral bouncy chair thing and god knows what else lol. Cot is from my sister. My friend at school asked me the other day if I wanted her cotbed before she sold it on. Won't fit at side of my bed so asked sister if she wanted it. She did as she only has a small cot and her baby is coming up 7 months now and shes worried about him sitting up and pulling himself over side of cot. So shes got the cotbed for his room and I'm having her cot.

The benefits of coming from a large family lol. Someone is always having a baby and able to pass stuff on. Only big thing I need to buy is the pram and eventually some bedroom furniture but as jesus doesn't have his own room yet that can wait. I'm lucky as most recent baby (brothers little girl) has quite a 'snobby' mummy who didn't want anything passed on. So eben though there will only be 6 months between them (which isn't a lot when they get older) I'll still get first dibs. And other sister has a little girl at 18 months so a big gap development wise so should be on different bits of kit at different times.

6 weeks until I find out what colour. Sigh. Then I can really start buying stuff.

froubylou Wed 26-Jun-13 11:44:23

Oh and I have tidied up, hoovered everywhere (including my PC desk which is shameful lol) done the washing and am just about to take dog out.

Nice, guilt free afternoon snooze for me pmsl.

Holly1977 Wed 26-Jun-13 11:46:57

I'm getting random stabbing pains in my boobs too. Haven't felt any movement yet, can't wait to...

I'm having a really tough time at work too. My colleague is an uber bitch as you all know. And because it's our company and I'm solely responsible for running the place (she's the doctor), it's my sole responsibility to recruit someone, sort out mat cover, train them, basically to make sure it'll all be fine while I'm off. So no pressure then...! She's not at all supportive of me wanting to have "so long" off work - I'm having 6 months, I'd have 12 if me and OH could afford it. He's going to be a house husband when I come back. Anyway, it's all quite stressful and a lot to think about. Just thought I'd have a wee vent! OH isn't helping as he keeps saying I'll need to keep in touch with work while on mat leave to make sure the company doesn't fold in my absence. Which is pretty much missing the point of mat leave if you ask me. I'm not averse to having the occasional conversation and answering the odd email as long as I get more than statutory mat pay (not sure the business can stand this yet). But I'm definitely not going to give bean to a grandparent so I can come to work for a day here and there. Christ, only 14 weeks gone and I feel like I'm already being pressured to come back to work!

Frouby, my house is a shit tip, don't worry! I rarely hoover these days, am never up to date with laundry, the bath only gets washed when I want to have a soak etc. But I live on a building site and that's my excuse!

QueenofWhispers Wed 26-Jun-13 14:09:39

Having problems with youngest sister today.

Both my younger sisters live with us, because we have the space and we genuinely love them. However we do expect some chores to be done around the house--and I hate to have to remind someone to do their chores if they live in our home.

Originally, sister 1 was supposed to do laundry when she moved in for uni 3 years ago but she was terrible at it; so she helped out with DS and that made it good enough; when sister 2 moved in we asked her to do the laundry and walk the dog. The laundry NEVER gets done and every morning I am woken to a very agitated dog who needs to be walked. I would walk him but he loves jumping up at me and he is quite a large puppy.

I had agreed with sister 2 (who pushed for the puppy to begin with) that she would wake up every morning at 7:30 am and take pup for a walk; in the past 6 months she has done this maybe 4 times. I am roused every morning to loud barks that are startling! I could not handle it anymore and raised my voice a little at her this morning--instead she decided she needed to take change all of her clothes and put on make up before she took him out for a walk. On her way out she yelled at me for reminding her that this is my home and I've let her stay with us. I have now asked her to leave.

She still hasn't though. I really do hope she leaves. I do love her very much but I've never met anyone dumber; insecure and self obsessed.

abcdemma Wed 26-Jun-13 14:16:51

Sorry for everyone having a hard time in work, but I do kinda envy you all for having a job. We found out about Bambino whilst we were working abroad so came back home and I've not found a job since. Applied for hundreds, got 3 interviews which were unsucessful. I've got 2 more lined up so fingers crossed. The lady at job centre basically told me I was up the creek without a paddle and was fecking useless, but after I did my own research I think I may just qualify for Mat. Allowance by the skin of my teeth. OH found a job (which he hates), and I feel so guilty for not being able to contribute to the finances, let alone having a baby to think about. Don't know how much longer I can hide a burgeoning bump from prospective employers either.
I snapped at my sister the other day for moaning about her job and feel kinda bad so not "kicking off" to other people about it now but jees this is not the situation I wanted when we bring our child into the world!!

Holly1977 Wed 26-Jun-13 14:37:01

that sounds really tough abc. Even with a job I'm super stressed about how we're going to pay the bills while I'm off. the statutory min will just pay the mortgage, we'll have to live on OH's wage which isn't much... oh well, no point worrying about it i suppose.

queen, it sounds like your sisters are taking the p1ss, no mistake. how old are they? do they contribute financially at all? if it was me, if they want to behave like lodgers (ie not helping out around the house) then they should pay the going rate and eat separately.that might make them more motivated to help out more?... i know it's hard to make family pay but they're grown ups (i'm assuming) so should chip in with money if they're going to help out properly. maybe they think you're a bit of a soft touch and knew they wouldn't have to stick to the arrangements? living with family and friends, always a good way to spoil relationships if you ask me! my best friend lived with me for 6 months or so and I could have cheerfully killed her by the end!

QueenofWhispers Wed 26-Jun-13 14:58:54

Sister 1 helps out quite a lot and when she has money contributes happily. I do feel she makes her stay worth it in the house.

Sister 2 is a good sister at times (and I do love her) but she is useless. She goes to one of the easiest universities in the world; it's a school where you barely need one functioning brain cell to attend. She still failed an entire term. She went everyday! When she was asked why she didn't do well she said it was because she was looked down upon for not having an authentic LV bag. When our Father sent her money for shopping she screamed that £3k wouldn't be enough for two pairs of shoes and a bag.

In the year that she has spent here, she has dated a string of men who have promised to take her shopping but havent; she has posed topless with my puppy to make herself more popular within a certain group of friends (who still dont think much of her). In all honesty, when she took these pictures I realised that I have a very very very troubled young girl in my house, but on the other hand she does have a brain in there. I've seen it work (maybe once, but it's worked before).

In this day and age I just cannot appreciate women letting anyone taking nude pictures of them. I understand that some women have found opportunity from it, but surely the humiliation, degradation and inability to control who sees the pictures leaves a deep impact? Am I just being old fashioned?

Roselau Wed 26-Jun-13 16:51:28

Abc. I’m so sorry I’ve been a moaning b*tch. I blame the hormones. When I step back and look at it realistically, I have a great situation. Good pay, good benefits. My husband is looking for a job, but he’s still on garden leave and has a couple of offers lined up (although he is in Los Angeles right now, interviewing for yet another one, which is making me nervous). I have a lot of responsibilities, but my direct team is wonderful, and I still manage to get out of here by 6pm. I would DIE if I was just sitting at home. I don’t envy you whatsoever. Have you thought of doing your own thing? Even if it’s baking cakes or something like that to keep yourself occupied? Or starting a website? You must be going bonkers. Wish there was something I could do.

Alyssa1978 Wed 26-Jun-13 18:50:12

My nipples are also really dark, happened quicker this pg. normally does not happen until a lot later.
I'm convinced the pains are because my boobs are bigger as my shoulders and the top of my back and shoulder blades hurt daily too, isn't pregnancy a joy lol grin

mumoftwoboysS Wed 26-Jun-13 18:55:19

abc I know how you feel- I got pregnant whilst job hunting so am now also up shit creek with regards to employment. No-one is going to employ a pregnant woman. I am lucky tho and dH can support us all- tho I have to be careful with money (and that's harder when not working as there's more time to spend it!) I'm not finding it so bad- maybe it depends what you're like. Some people might hate it but I look on the bright side and it means I can spend more time with my boys. I'm also trying to figure out if I can make money whilst at home but so far none of my ideas have come to anything a combo of lack of entrepreneurial genes and confidence I think! I'm creative and have thought of making and selling things but that's not going to bring in much- but I guess doing it is better than just thinking about it. Anyone have any inspiring ideas please shout!!

I haven't felt much at all the last week- trying not to think about the letter that will be waiting for me when I get home (risk factor for downs) and just enjoy the rest of my holiday....

Like the rest of you, can't wait to feel proper kicks!

Alyssa1978 Wed 26-Jun-13 20:16:26

I started to feel movement at 14 weeks and when I saw my consultant at 16 weeks she said it was too early angry
Yeah right! This is my third child and I know what I'm feeling for, I think I can tell the difference between gas by now........I was fuming lol.

I fell pregnant with ds2 while on mat leave with ds1 and I fell pregnant this time while on mat leave with ds2 lol, they even said "it's every Xmas isn't it" I haven't worked over the last 2 and won't be there this one either blush

QueenofWhispers Wed 26-Jun-13 21:19:27

problem sorted with sister 2

she has apologised, has taken responsibility for dog and will get to CBT to work out her issues. Both sisters will pay 50% of the cleaning ladies fee's and will be on kitchen duty 3 times a week.

I feel soo much better...

mumoftwoboysS Wed 26-Jun-13 21:44:07

Alyssa I agree 14 weeks isn't too early! I felt first little movements at around 14 wks with DS1, 13 wks with DS2 and even earlier this time tho I'm sure people don't believe me when I tell them that! And it's so annoying to be told we must be imagining it! I know my body and you do get to know a tiny ripple of movement compared to gas!
Anyone else found their stomach is just like a ball already?! Mine is insane and I don't get it as my uterus is only below my belly button isn't it? So why is my stomach so hard and round above that? Maybe it's cos it's my 3rd and my stomach muscles are shot to bits!

abcdemma Wed 26-Jun-13 22:25:22

mumoftwo lets start a business selling cakes and trinkets etc... although my last cake turned out rock solid cause the 'syrup' set solid so a bit of training needed!
Glad your sibling problem was sorted Queen, shows that talking really can resolve problems smile
Think I've felt little movements but as it's my first I'm not sure. Belly is too like a big old beach ball, OH says it's obvious but since bambino is only low down I'm thinking top half is stuff that's been moved out of bottom half?? Or food. Probably the latter blush

Alyssa1978 Thu 27-Jun-13 07:53:06

I think it's because it's your third mum mine is exactly the same and it seemed to shoot out right away into a pregnant tum lol

Featherbag Thu 27-Jun-13 08:27:32

Had a good day at work yesterday, just for once we actually had enough staff and a manageable workload - used to be like that every day but Cameron & co have closed 2 other local A&E departments and downgraded a third, so yesterday is now the exception! I know I'm lucky to have a job, and when I can actually do it properly I do love it.

Saw my MW yesterday, predictably started crying within seconds of getting there. She's made me an appointment with the obstetrician all of the staff choose, she's really lovely and was supposed to be my consultant last time before it all went tits-up. She's also going to speak to the supervisor of midwives today about how they can help me deal with my anxiety, and will call me back today. She thinks maybe a debrief with the SMW might help, although she'd like me to see a counsellor but the waiting list is so long I'll probably have had the baby by the time I get an appointment. She says she's determined I'm going to have a different experience this time, and seemed quite cross with the HCPs I've seen so far. So I feel a lot better!

MrsShrubs Thu 27-Jun-13 09:26:43

Glad you're feeling better about things featherbag not sure whether you've tried it and it does say you can take it if your MW or Dr are aware and fine for you to take it while pregnant but Rescue Remedy was a life saver for me when I used to have panic attacks, they do a night version of it as well if things are keeping you up at night. Also an oldie but a goodie is the breathing into a paper bag, just helps you get re-centred and your breathing back to normal. It obviously won't make the anxiety disappear but can help you gain control again when things get too much.

Featherbag Thu 27-Jun-13 09:59:07

Thanks Mrs, it's not so much panic attacks, or even all the time, but every time I come into contact with a maternity-related HCP I end up sobbing! It's down to my feelings about the birth of DS and my fears for this birth going the same way. I'm the opposite of anxious the rest of the time!

This thread is not accepting new messages.