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November 2012 - please form an orderly queue

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StuntNun Fri 09-Nov-12 19:54:04

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MissMummy1 Tue 20-Nov-12 12:20:39

Thanks bryzoan . Re telling people I'm in labour, I want my mum to know and dh and noone else. MIL is desperate we phone her the second things start happening so she can get on a flight over here. oh joy I'm undecided on that one...

The constant stream of text messages are driving me nuts too. Not even due until next Thursday! hmm

Bryzoan Tue 20-Nov-12 12:22:49

detective that is loads and loads of lovely movement. Very reassuring. It is so hard working out when induction would be the best option. Very interested in your contingency plan. As dd was prem I lost more control than I wanted re monitoring and being on a drip etc but still managed to stay active and was largely ignored as they were all sure I'd need a section so left us alone till I was pushing and dh had to go get them! But dd was taken straight away to Nicu so I barely got to see her to start with. Really want to have time on the cord and skin to skin this time if possible - I'm convinced dd would have fewer problems now if she had had more from the placenta instead of being taken away and having more blood taken from her for tests etc. I think my biggest worry about induction is that things will be medicalised and I'll lose control again - when really it should all be a straight forward natural process!

Bluetinkerbell Tue 20-Nov-12 13:14:18

For all those getting annoying texts, phone calls. Reply with this:
Good luck with the waiting!

TheDetective Tue 20-Nov-12 13:21:01

You have no idea how many texts and calls and facebooks I get now.

I can't put a normal status on facebook without a comment...

It doesn't help having 50+ midwives as friends on there hmm. If it wasn't for it being one of the ways my Dad and Nan stay in contact easily, I'd deactivate the bloody thing.

One of my colleagues, I love her to bits, she is young, no kids, very sweet and innocent. But she hates water births, etc. Epidural and synto are her comfort zone. She is practically beside herself, and the texts to me are winding me up more. I've tried to just brush it off, but the message 'plenty of people have sections, think of the healthy baby' was not good for my hormones!!!

I've not actually written a contingency plan yet Bryzoan. But I know pretty much what it will consist of! I might write it later. I don't want to though.

newbiebaby Tue 20-Nov-12 13:38:55

grin love that website bluetinkerbell!!

Brockle Tue 20-Nov-12 13:47:54

Two calls from my SIL in the last five mins! Given that she has not called in three weeks she can bugger off. However I have had the loveliest morning with DS2 doing colouring and making puppets. Sometimes what you think will be the shittiest day turns out to be one of the nicest. I know he is supposed to be at school and is a snot monster but it has been great!

detective I agree with the rough outline of your contingency plan. I hated continuous monitoring with DS1 and think it is more stressful rather than less. Induction is fine but they seem to make it so invasive that it seems to me to be counterproductive a lot of the time.

I am studiously ignoring the pains I am getting and the continuous trips to the loo as it will amount to bugger all!

pikz Tue 20-Nov-12 14:08:31

brockle I to am ignoring the pains and toilet trips as I had it yesterday too. Until I see a gush of water on the flood I'm not believing anything.

detective I think you are doing awesome and I admire you holding strong. Having seen what the girl in our NCT group who got induced had gone through and is still in hospital compared to those who have gone naturally I can totally see why no induction.

The texts and phone calls do my nut. I now only answer my mum and dp.

georgee Tue 20-Nov-12 14:10:42

You truly are my hero detective.

Everyone, just found out that one of the children who was being looked after by the DHs downstairs while I had my babyshower upstairs the other day has developed chicken pox. DD hasn't had it and if she developed it the likelihood is that it would come out around when I give birth (if I'm a few days late - it would come out when the baby was a few days old if he/she is on time). I've had it (but will request a blood test to check immunity). Anyone know if this is something I should worry about? I'm just worried about a newborn being exposed to the virus. Ta.

TheDetective Tue 20-Nov-12 14:24:50

See, I find it hard - because I do believe that medical intervention is indeed necessary in some cases. But it is so heavily over used, due to fear of litigation, that the true need for it has been lost somewhere along the way.

If there was an actual problem, I'd absolutely agree to intervention. But the over use is what frightens me so much. And yes, I see it in practice - midwives are almost powerless to stop this. The only person who can is the woman in the middle - but the 'fear' makes you think you are doing the best thing for you and your baby at the time. Well, not even fear sometimes - but being told you must do xyz based on what?

I take responsibility for my choices, and don't appreciate being made to feel like I am doing something dangerous, for not following along an 'accepted' path!

I am a person with thoughts and feelings, not a statistic is a phrase I utter in my mind every day right now!

Talking to my mum yesterday (and DS's dad - although it wasn't an indepth conversation!) who was with me after DS's birth, both are in absolute agreement that I am doing the right thing! I will do everything I can to not be in that kind of position again, and if it ends up the same way - well at least I can say I did everything I could - and it was just meant to be!

I'm tempted to go to where I work for the birth if I do end up going down that line - but I'm not sure I could behave myself enough to ever return! My colleagues keep telling me to go there and they will support me - but ultimately, I have to work there! And it could go down like a tonne of bricks. Plus I'd have to do something about the fanjo and I can't even see it!

TheDetective Tue 20-Nov-12 14:30:18

MM is your back no better? sad Has it got worse, or just stayed the same?

What about a gentle massage? I am thinking of going for one tomorrow or thursday, for a chill out! Well, once I've braved checking the bank balance!

I would have thought if it was sciatic it would have eased up a little now, but its been a couple of days. Are you still cleaning like a loon and bending? You need to stay mobile, but without anything strenuous!

It's at times like that I really miss Ibuprofen grin.

TheDetective Tue 20-Nov-12 14:32:33

Ok, the bank balance - he say no! No massage for me sad

Still, we have food, and petrol in both cars - so I can't moan! Only 1 week til bumper extra shifts pay day!

Could put it on the credit card I suppose.

Chunkychicken Tue 20-Nov-12 14:32:51

Get your DP on the case with a beard trimmer detective grin Perhaps you could decide what compromises you are willing to make to get a birth closer to your 'ideal'? Not at all the same, but I agreed to active management of the 3rd stage rather than not have my HB. This was a compromise I accepted. It is difficult though, when you work in the field too...

mrswee Tue 20-Nov-12 14:34:42

Hi all.
Not the best day so far just flopped about the flat this morning then got ready to take DD to nursery after lunch. On leaving the house discovered the DH had not taken out the heavy glass recycling box, after forgetting the fing rubbish last week and the stinky food box yesterday and me even saying to him last night that the box needs to go out.. Him going outside at the time !!!
So I lifted it out like I did with the bin last week (at 7am in my pjs) baring in mind I can hardly walk now.. This made us miss the bus and then my friend texted and cancelled meeting this afternoon, third friend to do this in a week- which all made me in a pisser of a mood. Standing waiting for the next bus and this couple with 3 kids under 5ish wanted past us. DD was ever so slightly in the way but they could have squeezed past OR AT LEAST SAID EXCUSE ME! But instead gave me a massive dirty look and just stopped. I ushered DD out of the way and they went past without a thank you or out.. So because I was in such a stinker anyway I said 'you could have said excuse me or thanks' to which I got the answer for both members of the couple in front of their 3 kids and my 3 year old 'shut up you f-ing bitch' 'how dare you speak to me like that you f-ing bitch' and referring to DD 'that little bitch was in the f-ing way' I just replied that that is a lovely way to speak in front of kids. Honestly how to people get so scummy? I'm clearly 9 months pregnant and ok I should have just ignored them but that was way over the top and upsetting for all the kids.

So my 3 questions for today are
- why are some people so scummy?
Why can't my DH take out any rubbish ever?
And why are my friends so crap?
I just want to hide now.
And I know I'll see that couple with the kids every where I go from now on!!!

Sorry to hear DS is sick detective Sod's law says it will bring on your birth today!

TheDetective Tue 20-Nov-12 14:34:50

There isn't much room for compromise - I'm not sure how I can! I've never been any good at this compromise thing!

DP doesn't have a beard trimmer because he only grows bumfluff. I was going to get him a nasal hair trimmer for christmas though.... grin

TheDetective Tue 20-Nov-12 14:41:41

Georgee It isn't ideal timing - no. I'd speak to your midwives for further advice if you DD does come out with it. When did the child start with the spots? IIRC it is contagious a day or two before the spots arrive, til they have crusted over. Was your baby shower at the weekend?

You would really need to be so very careful with hygiene and visitors and what not... I do hope your DD doesn't catch it now, or if she does the scabs heal before the baby comes!

If it happens, it happens though. Chances are everything will be fine - but obviously it is much more severe for newborns. I think you will have to see if DD comes out with it first.

For what it is worth, DS took about 3 exposures before he got it when he was 3.

Lilliana Tue 20-Nov-12 15:13:12

Rubbish night. DH has got a chest infection so after trying to sleep next to him sounding like a chainsaw we both ended up at 3am. Took him to the doctors at 9am and now he's drugged up on anti-b's and ibuprofen and I've spent the morning asleep on the sofa.

Not feeling up to giving birth today!

Welcome Bryzoan and Newbie

I have a sweep booked for tomorrow - not looking forward to it after hearing that it hurt so much.

Detective don't know what to say apart from ((hugs))

Fatima take it easy, you have had a lot on your plate the last few days.

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