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to wish dd's nursery didn't have to assess her and give her targets?

(40 Posts)
DefiniteMaybe Wed 25-Sep-13 23:25:49

I know it's part of the eyfs and they have to, but ffs, she's 2!
I want to tell them to back the fuck off and let her play. I send her to nursery so she can play whilst I study for my degree, not to be given targets to meet. As long as they cuddle her when she needs it and give her fun things to do we're both happy.
They gave me a sheet when I picked her up the other day and told me to write down the things she can do at home. But, I can't see the point. Is there a point? Can we opt out?

ICameOnTheJitney Wed 25-Sep-13 23:34:54

I don't know if there's any point in opting out....they need to know where she's at developmentally in order to tailor her day...and to see if she's developing "correctly".

At 2 there are certain milstones which should be met...and sometimes it's hard to tell when children may not display ALL skills in nursery which they do at home.

if you opt out you will attract attention and questions I should think. Are you worried that she can't do some of the things they've listed?

ICameOnTheJitney Wed 25-Sep-13 23:36:13

Plus...nursery is mainly about playing but there are other things which come into skills, listening skills and receptive language....toileting and feeding...they're all things which the staff need to deal with and your input helps them. Not filling it in is obstructive because she's not simply "playing" for the whole time is she?

Jewelledkaleidoscope Wed 25-Sep-13 23:38:36

Yes, it seems rather silly.

If there are delays, nursery should of course be able to spot them. But professionalising most children's development is overdoing it. She can meet her targets when she's 30 and pushing for higher sales figures. Not aged two when she can sing x amount of nursery rhymes off by heart.

DefiniteMaybe Wed 25-Sep-13 23:44:14

Hmm I can see that they need to keep track of where they are, she's meeting all her milestones just fine. She's only there for 11 hours a week, things like social skills, toileting, feeding, speaking and listening skills are down to me to sort really. Maybe I'm just being a control freak. grin

MortifiedAdams Wed 25-Sep-13 23:46:41

I dont see that they are pushing her to do more.....they just want to.know what she can do.

DoJo Wed 25-Sep-13 23:49:05

I can understand your frustration, but considering that most parents make some effort to keep track of whether their children are developing in line with expectation or around the same rate as their peers, so nursery are just doing the same. Unfortunately they can't just tell you they are doing it, they are obliged to prove it as well.

uselessinformation Wed 25-Sep-13 23:52:17

Just write something on the sheet to keep them happy because they are only doing it because ofsted requires it. Then forget about it if you have no worries about her development.

PedlarsSpanner Wed 25-Sep-13 23:55:36

Yes what useless said

Its bloody ofsted needing evi of partnership and engaging with parents. Fill in form and send back, staff will be eternally grateful

Lweji Wed 25-Sep-13 23:57:12

Is there a specific list, or can you put the items you like?

ICameOnTheJitney Wed 25-Sep-13 23:58:55

The skills you mention aren't down to you alone though OP...not once you send them into the care of other people.

DefiniteMaybe Thu 26-Sep-13 00:01:40

Thanks everyone, it's a blank table to fill in. Not really sure what to write, she does lots of things at home. I don't know what sort of things they want to know.

DefiniteMaybe Thu 26-Sep-13 00:05:07

She's still with me 94ish% of the time. It's mostly down to me.

PedlarsSpanner Thu 26-Sep-13 00:10:32

How about she loves being outside
Or she turns pages of books carefully
Or she can put wellies on with no assistance
Or she has a circle of trusted adults in addition to her parents, she points with her eyes as each is named/refers to grandad as bampot, her special name for him
She can recite twinkle twinkle with Star Fingers
She can use counting words eg pointing at peas on a plate


ICameOnTheJitney Thu 26-Sep-13 00:15:54

It is mostly down to you yes....but those 11 hours equate to almost two full days in a school setting...and so they do jave a responsibility to cate for your dd in all ways.

MortifiedAdams Thu 26-Sep-13 06:18:59

She identifies the colours red blue and green
Knows a variation of animal noises
Says please and thank you in thr right context

This is what they will want, generic stuff.

chelsbells Thu 26-Sep-13 06:32:53

Is it for her two year old check? If so it's to replace what the health visitors used to do, Nurserys now have to do them - as well as all other developmental folders too...

Things like can she play co-operatic with a group of children, express how she's feeling, if she's sad can she tell you that, form simple/complex sentences, able to hold a conversation, run, catch a ball, is she toilet trained - those kind of things.

If your unsure ask the nursery for a set of the EYFS standards for some pointers for what 22-36month olds should be doing! - you can just copy them over then. It's a pain but it's got to have parent input on it as well as nursery staff! Hope that helps

Bonsoir Thu 26-Sep-13 06:42:52

If you aren't worried, make something up/ copy something and leave it at that.

My DD didn't do what she was supposed to when she was little because we are in France and, funnily enough, so called " development" is nothing of the sort - most of it is purely cultural stuff. My DD didn't go through esoteric French stages of development but I can assure you that at 9 she is more than fine.

brettgirl2 Thu 26-Sep-13 06:49:41

Just write what you actually do with her at home. We've always just laughed at the 'school reports'. They start earlier than 2 dd2 has one for 10 months with 'mathematics' listed grin

SoupDragon Thu 26-Sep-13 06:57:46

I don't know what sort of things they want to know.

Ask them smile

Things like completing jigsaw puzzles, whilst clearly playing, also help with fine motor skills and problem solving. She will be getting "fun things to do" but children learn from these without actually realising they are learning stuff. She's not being sat down with a maths worksheet or pages of latin verbs smile

overmydeadbody Thu 26-Sep-13 07:05:39

I tihnk it's a good thing.

Just write down things she can do, anything from drinking from a cup, choosing what to play with, sustaining concentration, what toys she likes the most, how she interacts with others, what sheo does at the park etc etc.

Susandeath Thu 26-Sep-13 07:06:22

I'm a childminder, and I follow the EYFS. Every child should be monitored in case there's a problem, even when the parents are involved with their child's learning as you are, trained nursery staff can pick up potential problems that you might not have done - I picked up that a child in my care could possibly need glasses; because the child had always acted the way that they had, mum didn't think there was a problem. The child now wears glasses. Some parents do plonk their children down in front of the tv, and never interact with them, and it's these children that will need more help. The gap in some children's learning at age two will become so wide at age 5 they may never catch up. I'm sure that you've heard of children starting school that can't use a knife and fork, or can't speak clearly, yet there's nothing medically wrong. On my last training course I was told 'see the gap, mind the gap, close the gap', and that is what the monitoring is trying to do. The child is still learning through play, but in monitoring, I know i can get out different toys to help child A with fine motor skills, or go to a toddler group to help child B with socialisation, or with a different child something else, but without the observation, assessment, planning cycle, I wouldn't know what activities to do to help the individual children. And yes we do lots of free play! Cricky, that was an essay!

overmydeadbody Thu 26-Sep-13 07:07:08

And evewrything they do at nursery is playing. They just make sure they have a huge variety of playing opportunities to help children develop in all areas of the EYFS curriculum (which is a very good curriculum imo)

overmydeadbody Thu 26-Sep-13 07:09:27

It's not just incase there is a problem though, it is to make sure every child is reaching their full potential and has enough opportunities to grow and develop further.

ICameOnTheJitney Thu 26-Sep-13 07:52:08

Deadbody no it's not. As I said, they eat and toilet too. Both huge parts of a child's development.

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