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To be fed up of this tirade.

(119 Posts)
babybearsmummy Mon 29-Jul-13 14:17:44

A lot of you may remember my post last week R.E. the wedding cake. I didn't do it due to dp and dd being so ill. Friday came along and my dd had had a HUGE fever during the night- the ear infection she'd been diagnosed with on the wednesday had got the better of her and she was very floppy and sad and wouldn't stop crying unless she was being held my my dp and I. So we whizzed her down the doctors as soon as they opened on friday and got her checked over again and she was given stronger anti-biotics and has been dosed up with antibiotics and calpol over the weekend and is feeling a lot better now.

But as my dd was so ill, I decided not to go to my friend's wedding (dp had to pop into work a few times over the day, even though they'd given him the day off compassionate leave) So there was no way I could, let alone wanted, to leave her.

I got a text at 10am from my friend saying that, due to my lack of "compassion" in "a time of crisis" that I was no longer welcome to the wedding. So I replied that dd was not well and couldn't come anyway (no reply for the rest of the day).

But as of Saturday, I've had non stop calls to my mobile and landline, texts, emails, facebook messages from her and her mum saying how selfish I was for not properly apologising or attending the wedding to make amends. I've turned off the phone, my mobile, shut down the computer and everything, but the messages keep racking up. I just want to cry. It's like they're sat talking to each other and every time they think of something nasty to say, they have to call/ message me again. AIBU to just want to cry and want my "friend" to find something more interesting to do on her honeymoon than shout at me!! I knew this would come back to bite me on the bum.

StealthPolarBear Mon 29-Jul-13 14:20:07

ugh. She sounds horrible, can you block as much as possible?

StealthPolarBear Mon 29-Jul-13 14:20:39

and how could you have attended the wedding to make amends? You were uninvited!

phantomnamechanger Mon 29-Jul-13 14:21:42

you are better off without friends like that, truly you are. how utterly selfish of her. the original cake request was out of order in the circs, and with your child so ill your priorities were in the right place.

they can go to hell

oh and one text back "this is harassment and I am saving as evidence for the police - please do not contact me again"

thebody Mon 29-Jul-13 14:21:57

so you didn't make the wedding cake or you didn't attend the wedding?

not doing the first seems a terrible let down but not attending if your child is ill seems sensible.

hope your dd is feeling better.

phantomnamechanger Mon 29-Jul-13 14:22:42

then block/ignore/unfriend

thebody Mon 29-Jul-13 14:22:52

didn't see your original post so sorry if all been said before.

DidoTheDodo Mon 29-Jul-13 14:23:16

(I followed your previous cake thread)
She is mad as a spoon and completely unreasonable to be behaving like this. I am aghast.
She's just got married and all she can think of to do is message you vitriol??
Not a friend at all, in any sense of the word.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Mon 29-Jul-13 14:23:40

Oh you poor thing. I hope your daughter is feeling better. I'm with you on wondering why she doesn't have better things to do straight after her wedding.

Did the "you are no longer welcome to my wedding" text come on the day of the wedding?

DidoTheDodo Mon 29-Jul-13 14:24:36

Oh and I hope your DD is feelig a bit better today.

cjel Mon 29-Jul-13 14:24:48

YANBU to want to cry, I would as well. I think you are better off without them I would also echo suggesting you will collect messages to report harassment. then if they continue reprt it. Don't suffer them in silence.

LessMissAbs Mon 29-Jul-13 14:25:11

You would think she would be more interested in the fact she's just got married! Is she not going away on honeymoon?

mignonette Mon 29-Jul-13 14:25:11

They are not friends. Bridezilla stuff stops after the wedding. And roping in Mothers/various hideous relatives to harrass you is off the scale vile.

Dump her. and give her an 'official warning' re contacting you again.

You are perfectly reasonable in your actions.

StealthPolarBear Mon 29-Jul-13 14:25:13

thebody, the OP was asked to make the cake at the very last min after the bride had been "let down" by the original cake makers. The OP never said she could/would

CunningAtBothEnds Mon 29-Jul-13 14:25:16

(Body just to catch you up the OP hadnt let the bride down, the brides original cake maker did, and the OP couldnt bail her out due to time constraints and illness)

OP what a bunch of horrid people! Childish! YANBU

GoodMorningMoon Mon 29-Jul-13 14:25:22

I am gobsmacked on your behalf!

What a miserable fucking twat she is! To torment you and to do on her honeymoon. Just goes to show you what type of person she is. I hope this bites her in the arse.

I'd block her on Facebook/email, and screen all phone calls. You just can't engage in these conversations with such insane, irrational people.


thebody Mon 29-Jul-13 14:27:10

right well then she's a vile cow op and follow the advice above.

however if she's so bored on her honeymoon I wouldn't rate the happiness of her married state.

DidoTheDodo Mon 29-Jul-13 14:27:15

I bet her new husband is pleased as buggery to be spending his honeymoon with a miserable, obsessed, madwoman.

pictish Mon 29-Jul-13 14:28:31

What a cow!!!
Since when does a fucking cake matter this much....a fucking cake??!!

Oooh I am steaming on your behalf, and right at this moment think she is asking for a bloody nose. angry

I may come back once I have something sensible to say.

YouStayClassySanDiego Mon 29-Jul-13 14:28:56

What a nasty , vicious pair of loons they both are! angry

She's actually on her honeymoon and continuing to harass you, what a tit!

Do keep a log of all contact from them, did she have form for being slightly loopy before she had the cake drama?

DipMeInChocolate Mon 29-Jul-13 14:29:21

What a bitch. You did the right thing re the cake - which was HER fucking problem in the first place for dicking you about. Going to a wedding with a poorly child is a far more selfish act.
thanks you should not be attacked by them for this.

CookieLady Mon 29-Jul-13 14:30:45

Ignore, ignore, ignore. It's frustrating them no end that you've not responded to their vitriol. I would second the above suggestion of warning them that this is harassment and if they won't desist they leave you with no choice but to contact the police.

Hope your little one is feeling better.

Bogeyface Mon 29-Jul-13 14:31:05

I totally agree with emailing AND texting AND FBing one message to both of them.

"I do not wish to have any further contact with you. I consider the messages you have sent so far to be harassment, if I receive any further messages then I will be contacting the police." then delete and block.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Mon 29-Jul-13 14:33:08

Wow, your "friend" is an absolute maniac! It would be one thing if you had arranged to make the cake to start with and had to back out at short notice, but seeing as that wasn't even the case, she has NO right to give you a hard time now. What an immense bitch! How can people treat others like this?

I second previous suggestions to warn her clearly that her behaviour constitutes harassment and you are keeping the messages, etc. as evidence to give to the police. Then do actually ring 101 to ask for their advice.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Mon 29-Jul-13 14:33:17

Well she's put another nail in the coffin.

And as thebody says, she must be having some kind of crap honeymoon to be obsessing about this.

I don't know about this, but at what point does it become harrassment?

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