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To not care how 'friendly' your dog is, if you can't control it, it should be on a lead

(246 Posts)
IcouldstillbeJoseph Thu 18-Jul-13 03:20:54

I'm neither a lover or hater of dogs but this is beginning to piss me right off rankle.

Near to where I live is a lovely lake. Nice path, children's play area, ducks etc. Popular in this weather.

I was out walking today with DS 2.6 and DD 6mo. As has happened on so many occasions now, we'll be stood feeding the ducks, only to have somebody's dog come bounding along to us, no owner in sight (the path is quite bendy) and start sniffing about. Now, obviously the sniffing I don't mind so much but DS is a bit wary of dogs and today one started trying to lick his face and was licking at DD's feet in the buggy. The owner then saunters around the corner, calling dog's name (to which it pays no attention) and then looks endearingly at the dog and at DS's worried expression and says "oh don't worry she just wants to give you kisses". No attempt to get control of the dog at all.

I gave tight-lipped half smile and turned away resisting urge to wipe DD feet with an anti-bac wipe

ThatsSoVanquish Thu 18-Jul-13 03:36:08

YANBU, definitely. They can't be certain of a dog's reaction, very selfish.

Fuzzysnout Thu 18-Jul-13 06:34:43

I absolutely agree. The same should also apply to the children of parents who let them run up to me or my dog and make no effort to control them.

mikkii Thu 18-Jul-13 06:40:24

I agree. We have 2 dogs, one can be trusted off the lead (stays with us, comes when called etc.), the other has to stay on s lead. My only comment old be that we have a lake nearby that has a fenced dog exercise area here we do let him off the lead. We re trying to train him to be better, like his sister. If you were in an area such as this, then, and only then would I say YABU

Morgause Thu 18-Jul-13 06:41:01

Dogs should always be on a lead in places like that, it doesn't matter how "friendly" the owner thinks they are - they should be under control. It used to annoy me as well when the DCs were little.

If you do say anything about not wanting wet doggy tongues and noses on the DCs some owners take it as a personal affront.

Sirzy Thu 18-Jul-13 06:46:54


In the same way if someone can see a child isn't happy with their dog sniffing around them don't make the extendable lead longer and laugh as they jump up at the child. DS was fine with dogs until some silly cow did that and now he is wary of them.

It's a shame because most dog owners are so sensible but there are a few idiots which make it harder for everyone.

chinup2011 Thu 18-Jul-13 06:52:30

I have a phobia of dogs.
Dogs off leads prevent me from walking anywhere in the countryside. Something I'd love to be able to do but the fear of what could run up to me or the children around every corner is too much.

jaggythistle Thu 18-Jul-13 06:58:06

YANBU. DS1 is currently terrified of dogs thanks to a huge one jumping all over him in the park. sad

DH said the owner showed no concern and was nowhere near their dog.

We're trying to show him all the well behaved dogs and owners playing happily or on leads when we're out, so that he doesn't want picked up every time he sees one. (he's 3).

SpiderCharlotte Thu 18-Jul-13 06:58:38

YANBU. At all.

MrsLouisTheroux Thu 18-Jul-13 07:02:23

Dear 'friendly dog' owner,
I don't care how friendly your dog is, I don't want it to run up to me, sniff me or jump up at me.
Thank you.

3MonthMaid Thu 18-Jul-13 07:03:33

YANBU it's the bane of my life at the moment.

DD is 6 and we live right next door to a park (actually its more of a cultured garden than a free running park). We have to walk through it every morning to school.

Steadily it's becoming a serious issue. DD used to be weary of dogs. Now she is downright terrified. She has had one too many bound up to her.

One nasty owner even told her to "grow up". I nearly spontaneously combusted on the spot. She was 5 FFS.

manchestermummy Thu 18-Jul-13 07:08:43

YANBU. We were at the vet with our cat and a dog started barking its head off. DD2 (who is currently wary of dogs due to MIL's dog barking at her all the time!) started to cry and got very upset. The dog's owners thought it was funny, the sight (and sound) of a small child in distress. I was sad and angry in equal measure.

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 07:22:18

Whilst I agree with you OP I would also say that if your child is getting particularly scared of dogs it is worth doing what you can to tackle that. Ds2 used to be terrified of dogs, mainly because he didn't know how to behave around them - he would run so of course dogs would chase him thinking he was playing. If one ran up to him he would make eye contact and lift his arms - none of which are great if you want dogs to ignore you.

Anyway his fear got so bad that he would start crying every time he was in close contact with a dog & that was problematic because the vast majority of his friends had dogs & so he stopped getting invitations to tea or to play a people's houses. I could understand why - rather than having a quiet few hours while the kids played would be having to deal with ds2 wailing.

In ds2's case his fear developed not fr

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 07:25:20

Grr not from any particularly bad incident, just from dogs doing normal doggy things.

Anyway we solved it with the rather extreme step of getting our own dog & ds2 is now a bloody dog whisperer who loves dogs (& they love him). But socially it is so much easier - and the invitations to visit other people started again.

Ragwort Thu 18-Jul-13 07:26:23

YANBU at all - and it is not just in case a child is 'scared' of a dog, I do not like dogs (or cats) at all, why should I have to experience them slobbering all over me, sniffing me etc etc. Why can't dog owners understand that not everyone likes dogs; I probably give a very dirty look at dogs and am often told 'don't worry, it won't hurt you' - it's not particularly that I think it will hurt me, but I just don't want it near me. grin. Especially if you are trying to enjoy a picnic at the beach or in a park, you are sitting down and a dog bounds over to you - horrible.

FourGates Thu 18-Jul-13 07:29:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FourGates Thu 18-Jul-13 07:30:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsLouisTheroux Thu 18-Jul-13 07:30:53

saintly My physical instinct when a dog runs right up to me is to lift my arms hmm in a kind of 'I don't like this, go away, I'm backing off' kind of way. Please tell me that this isn't a sign to them that I want to play?

MrsLouisTheroux Thu 18-Jul-13 07:33:17

four other people's children and pets! Just because the parents/ owners love them doesn't mean everyone else does!

Sirzy Thu 18-Jul-13 07:34:26

It is much easier to get children used to dogs when strangers aren't making decision to allow their unknown dog to run up to and upset children.

I have worked really hard to get DS used to known dogs, and to know how to behave around strange dogs but people not controlling their dogs can knock all of that right back

MrsLouisTheroux Thu 18-Jul-13 07:35:08

Totally agree Ragwort

Twattybollocks Thu 18-Jul-13 07:35:09

It doesn't matter if you are 110% certain your dog will not bite, even if it has no teeth.
Not everyone wants to be covered in dog slobber and muddy paw marks.

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 07:36:00

Mslouis - yep you are saying 'here doggy doggy doggy'. If you keep your arms down and ignore the dog they will probably ignore you - if they approach give them the back of your hand to sniff & they'll be gone.

My dog ignores everyone endless they talk to him which he then takes as an invitation to throw himself all over them in excitement. Luckily only dog lovers tend to talk to him.

Rosa Thu 18-Jul-13 07:37:27

YANBU at all. When DD was a toddler a dog bounded up and knocked her over she is now 4 and terrified of dogs.
Every opportunity we can we try to get her used to dogs - Then a very 'friendly ' dog bounces past being a happy dog and she freaks out . We have to start the process all over again. Yesterday it took us 10 mins to get her to stroke a placid guide dog - she has been asking about it again and wants to stroke it again which we will try to do. she really does squeal in terror when one runs near her so in our case consideration is appreciated.

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 07:38:28

If someone lifted their arms he'd probably think 'oh my word a ball a ball they have a ball' and leap around.

The other thing to do with an over enthusiastic dog is turn your back to them while making no eye contact etc.

But yes I'd put lifting your arms at the bottom of the list unless you like dogs on your shoulders!

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