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to ask DH to put his pants on...

(96 Posts)
scatteredbraincells Wed 30-Jun-10 18:25:41

...when he massages my back!
I get a lovely massage a few times a week before sleep and I'm very grateful, but DH insists on being naked.
Then his willy gets all excited (obviously at the sight of my perfect figure confused ) and suddenly I go from relaxed and about to fall blissfully asleep to having a bottom covered in c**k juice. I turn around and sure enough he has an erection.

I think he's thinking about sex and it ruins my massage, he swears he's not, only his penis is and he (DH) is well aware that this is not leading to sex.

I try to relax but my bum is still wet, he doesn't understand the problem, apparently if you love someone you don't mind their bodily fluids.

I have asked him a couple of times to put a pair of pants on before the massage and he refuses, then the whole experience is crap. Arrrrgh!

5inthebed Wed 30-Jun-10 18:28:20


Could you not have saved this for a Friday night?

YANBU, but honestly <shudder>

compo Wed 30-Jun-10 18:28:36

Well it's obviously a sexual massage to him
you need a masseuse , lol

scatteredbraincells Wed 30-Jun-10 18:29:53

no, I get a massage on Fridays grin

bibbitybobbityhat Wed 30-Jun-10 18:30:14

FGS woman.

T M I. Like, seriously, tmi.

Who the hell wants to hear about your dh's cock juice?

Come on!

thisisyesterday Wed 30-Jun-10 18:32:02

agree with bibbity.

if it makes it crap then just tell him you aren't interested

Disenchanted3 Wed 30-Jun-10 18:32:28

Ermm, am I missing something here, so hes pulling one off whilst masaging you?

or does he have piss problems?

usualsuspect Wed 30-Jun-10 18:32:56


HecateQueenOfWitches Wed 30-Jun-10 18:33:10

He may be 'well aware it's not leading to sex' but it sort of is, isn't it? For him. He is getting gratification from massaging you naked. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it's nice that he enjoys touching you so much.

You could, I suppose, refuse a massage if this ruins it for you? But then you're missing out on something you enjoy - but then you're not enjoying it, are you? If he was doing it as a nice thing to do for you, then he'd do what you want. If you don't like a slimy bum, why not cover your bottom so it doesn't get wet? Wear pants?

Or why not suggest that he wears pants when massaging you, and in return you will give him a massage and he can be naked if he wants?

Jacksmama Wed 30-Jun-10 18:33:24

<snurk> at being offended about c**k juice. You think this is TMI?

Scattered, I have no useful advice to offer except I totally see where you're coming from (so to speak) and it's too bad you're DH doesn't.

scatteredbraincells Wed 30-Jun-10 18:33:54

no, it's just the "prep" fluids iykwim

StuckInTheMiddleWithYou Wed 30-Jun-10 18:35:18


or even:

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Netmums.

scatteredbraincells Wed 30-Jun-10 18:36:17

thanks Hecate, I may suggest that. His argument is that "it's not comfortable"

Hmmm, maybe he just needs new, more comfortable pants

ilove Wed 30-Jun-10 18:37:09

You could always just have more sex? grin

Poshwellies Wed 30-Jun-10 18:38:41


How about you tell him you don't like his sticky nob on your arse while he massages you OP? Not difficult eh?

<midweek brainbleach>

scatteredbraincells Wed 30-Jun-10 18:39:39

I think that's why I feel a bit guilty, I haven't been in the mood for some time now. I battled depression recently and he's my rock, never comlains, however I am always aware that he'd like more than he's getting. Hence I get upset... I think...

QSincognitoErgoSum Wed 30-Jun-10 18:39:44

My advice to you:

Sock on cock
cock on clock

tick tock

Poshwellies Wed 30-Jun-10 18:40:46

rock indeed.

scatteredbraincells Wed 30-Jun-10 18:41:23


AnyFucker Wed 30-Jun-10 18:41:49

I thought this was going to be about the hot weather we've been having recently....

BecauseImWorthIt Wed 30-Jun-10 18:43:45

Then it's a bit mean accepting a massage from him when you know it's turning him on.

Can you not enjoy the massage and allow it to turn into sex? That's obviously what he's hoping will happen, but you're turning him down - a bit selfish, actually, I think.

What's the worst thing that could happen? You will have sex with him and enjoy it?!

Sn0wflake Wed 30-Jun-10 18:47:10

Well thanks for the laughter. smile

stressheaderic Wed 30-Jun-10 18:47:24

What Because said.

Sounds all a bit one-way to me.
I am willing to bet every single time he's done it, he's hoped it might just lead to sex. Surprise him one night, and do it.

moondog Wed 30-Jun-10 18:47:59

'cock juice'

You've put me right off my pre dinner G&T.

Poshwellies Wed 30-Jun-10 18:49:48

"prep" fluids?

Heard it all now.

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