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to expect good wanking etiquette?

(261 Posts)
bashon Sat 05-Jun-10 13:18:58

eg thou shan't leave thine wanky tissues anywhere else but in thine bin.

bashon Sat 05-Jun-10 14:27:03

Not son. Husband... Often leaves the odd rogue encrusted tissue by his side of the bed.

chaostrulyreigns Sat 05-Jun-10 14:27:42

Is this destined for Classics?


Cadelaide Sat 05-Jun-10 14:28:33

avada, I'm sooooo glad it's not just me who needs to know the style and colour grin

Cadelaide Sat 05-Jun-10 14:29:13

I'm imagining shades of red in a moss stitch?

Cadelaide Sat 05-Jun-10 14:29:32


slate blue/grey

CUNextTuesday Sat 05-Jun-10 14:30:27

I wish I hadn't started reading this as I tucked into my caesar salad with feta cheese sad

MrsCadwallader Sat 05-Jun-10 14:31:03

Oh, good god, I wish I had never opened this thread confused.

I have three (currently small) boys. I had braced myself for the teenage years, but only in terms of the vast quantities of food, the smelly gym kit, the smelly bedrooms, the revolting bathroom, the excess of testosterone and Lynx and hair gel....... I had completely failed to consider...... to consider....... THIS! confused

<weeps quietly>

MrsChemist Sat 05-Jun-10 14:31:13

What happens if she accidentally shrunk it in the wash? grin

Cadelaide Sat 05-Jun-10 14:33:44

She could have set up a lot of future problems there, that knitting mother.

What if that became the only way he could get off?

Imagine a bloke producing a little knitted mitten on a first date?

(Not that I sleep with blokes on the first date, of course)

bashon Sat 05-Jun-10 14:34:18

Well, my tissue troubles have been sidelined by a wank mitten.

if I wasn't already depressed....

EarthMotherImNot Sat 05-Jun-10 14:34:22

would feel like a virgin againwink

WilfShelf Sat 05-Jun-10 14:34:25

MrsCadwallader, me too <three boys>

I am currently paying my 11yo to do his own laundry in preparation grin

Slovenlymummy Sat 05-Jun-10 14:37:23

Friend of mine came back from uni one weekend and started cleaning her teenage brother's bedroom (not sure why...bit of a mother hen type character perhaps) Anyway, as she was picking up loads of crumpled tissues, he walks in and she says 'oh poor DB, have you had a terrible cold?' As he turned red and mumbled a shifty yes, the penny dropped. Don't think she cleaned his room again! grin

MrsCadwallader Sat 05-Jun-10 14:37:25

WilfShelf - good thinking. My eldest is still only 7, but it's never too early..... Not sure about the payment though [biggrin]

Cadelaide Sat 05-Jun-10 14:37:25

bashon grin

But come on, a wank mitten?

AvadaKedavra Sat 05-Jun-10 14:37:35

Ah you just wait til your boys delightfully tell you over breakfast that they had a "wetty" hmm

Cadelaide Sat 05-Jun-10 14:37:47

we can't just let that one lie now can we?

susiecutiebananas Sat 05-Jun-10 14:38:04

Your HUSBAND?? shock

I would have incredibly strong words to say about this behaviour! its disgusting - son or husband. But for some reason, the fact its your husband makes it just even worse.

Horrible! I hope he's suitably embarrassed that you should keep finding and disposing of them.

I still can't get out of my head the thought of my dear little girls winter mittens I will never see them in the same light again.

MrsCadwallader Sat 05-Jun-10 14:38:14

I mean grin


bearcrumble Sat 05-Jun-10 14:38:36

If she shrunk it in the wash presumably wanky son would be thrilled as he'd think it was his cock that had grown rather than the jizz-mitt that had shrunk.

weegiemum Sat 05-Jun-10 14:38:44

I can't knit mittens, or socks

<failed mother emoticon>

MrsChemist Sat 05-Jun-10 14:38:47

<boak> at wetty

AvadaKedavra Sat 05-Jun-10 14:39:13

Do you think she helpfully made a string for them to go round his sleeves in case he dropped it in the heat of the moment?

chaostrulyreigns Sat 05-Jun-10 14:39:27

I think I'm a little strange:

I'm more agog about the fact that she ironed it!

Surely she had too much time on her hands? grin

Actually, perhaps her DS did too! wink

Cadelaide Sat 05-Jun-10 14:39:47

crochet would be fine weegie.

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