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to be so pissed of with dh

(11 Posts)
squashimodo Sun 08-Nov-09 00:08:19

because he has not bought me a present in 5 years, and has ignored our anniversary for years, for not picking up our now 5 week old daughter except for five minutes a day under sufferance. I am so fed up of being the only one who picks up the baby, and have sat here and cried about it for the past hour. I hate him, what a twat he is!

mrsboogie Sun 08-Nov-09 00:11:20

he is a twat, sorry.

moshchops Sun 08-Nov-09 00:13:49

Have you asked him why?

He might not pick the baby up, if he is scared of breaking her?
As for the present stuff, simple, every birthday, xmas and anniversary from now on, you buy him NOTHING, instead you buy your self something with the money you would of spent on him. Oh, and you must make sure you give your self the present in front of him.

moshchops Sun 08-Nov-09 00:15:02

I ment to add, you must buy your birthday present from yourself on his birthday.

MaryMotherOfCheeses Sun 08-Nov-09 00:19:43

Sounds dreadful. I think you need to give us more information. Why on earth isn't he picking up the baby? Is it your first? Or does he think it's all your job? What does he say about giving presents?

kairo Sun 08-Nov-09 00:20:17

men, they forget there duties, i feel bad for you, i have known my husband for 10 yrs, i am 27, he buys me anything and everything but it always has to be me reminding him that some special occasion is on its way.

kairo Sun 08-Nov-09 00:21:39

you need to put your foot down, when you show a slight weekness or even sometimes when u cant be bothered to argue, they think they can get away with it x

squashimodo Sun 08-Nov-09 00:28:35

This is not our first dc, we have three ds's.
I have asked him why, and he acts all insulted that I would even think that he doesn't pick her up, but her doesn't I am with her all day and all night. He just refuses to connect with her in any way.
I have done the constantly reminding him thing about a special occasion etc. but after a few years it gets too much like begging, and my self esteem can not take it anymore.
He gets presents for his family, I think he thinks that because he pays the bills that he doesn.t need to get me a present. Yes I have been buying myself presents for a while now, I don't think he even notices. I told him today that I don't see any point in this marriage, because I am not happy, and I resent him.
I am just so fed up. I think I have pnd.

kairo Sun 08-Nov-09 00:49:33

oh my god, some things you have said , i can relate too.
My hubby will die for his family, everytime i cry he ignores me and walks away, he thinks i have no reason to be upset if he has given me everything.
I have no kids but i am desperately trying, feel really lonely sometimes. How old are you, if you dont mind me asking, I am 27

kairo Sun 08-Nov-09 00:51:41

dont bother reminding him anymore, trust me its not worth it, i would do reverse psychology, which is , show him that you can cope on your own, dress to kill, buy yourself things, make yourself feel good. If you can pick the kids up, then carry on. let him see the new you, let him come up to you and ask you' whats wrong, why you being different'

SolidGoldBangers Sun 08-Nov-09 02:38:27

It may be that your H is a twunt, on the other hand it may be that you have PND and are over-reacting. It's hard to tell from online posts, but it's worth going to your GP or HV and saying that you feel awful. Your DD is only 5 weeks old, having a newborn is very hard work and your hormones are all over the place.
Take care of yourself first and then reassess your marriage. Best of luck.

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