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To be annoyed that my ''friend';' called me a ....

(17 Posts)
poshsinglemum Thu 05-Nov-09 21:52:18


I think it's a sexist term anyway. It has connotations of crazy cat ladies. I am certainly not that. I prefer the term bachelorette.

Also, as I have a child I cannot technically be called a spinster.

Also, as she is supposed to be a mte shouldn't she use less derogatory terms to describe my status.

She is single AND childless.

She is always making barbe dcomments which is why I am so annoyed about this. if it was just an isolated incident I'd probably laugh it off.

Aranea Thu 05-Nov-09 21:55:39

Presumably she would apply the term to herself too though, if she is single and childless. I don't think it's an insult - doesn't it just mean an unmarried woman?

YABU - it might be different coming from a smug married.

poshsinglemum Thu 05-Nov-09 21:59:55

I just think that it is sexist and that she could refer to us as bachelorettes which means still means single woman but with more fun connotations.

She probably dosn't like being single. I enjoy it.

TrillianAstra Thu 05-Nov-09 22:05:28

grin when my friend got married the official churhc words were "spinster of this parish"

LyraSilvertongue Thu 05-Nov-09 22:07:54

I can see why you were upset. The word conjured up images of elderly virgins who own lots of cats/Anne Widdecombe.

poshsinglemum Thu 05-Nov-09 22:16:21

Anne Widicombe.

I am only 31 fgs and we are no longer living in Jane Austin's time. If it were up to me the term would be banned.

Also its so unfair how bachelor has fun, postitive connotations hence my preference for the term bachelorette.

Or how about even the term
''woman'' which dosn't make an issue of marital status?

LyraSilvertongue Thu 05-Nov-09 22:18:54

I don't like bachelorette either but it's way better than spinster.

BLEEPyouYOUbleepingBLEEP Thu 05-Nov-09 22:22:33

Oh I dunno, bachelorette is just as bad, if not worse, than spinster. It's on par with ladette. Barf

poshsinglemum Thu 05-Nov-09 22:23:02

I meant to say Anne Widicome lol.

I am not with it at all tonight!

Now I'm just going off to feed my army of cats.

BLEEPyouYOUbleepingBLEEP Thu 05-Nov-09 22:23:21

x posted with yer there lyra smile

poshsinglemum Thu 05-Nov-09 22:24:40

But at least ladettes are up for it and have fun.

Spinster dosn't sound very sexual.

Mabe theres a certain dignity in being a spinster...

TBH I am more of a nun nowadays!

Hulababy Thu 05-Nov-09 22:25:27

Don't like spinster, but IMO bachelorette sounds even worse - and made up. What is wrong with just "single" or "unmarried"?

poshsinglemum Thu 05-Nov-09 22:29:11

I know. Exactly but some people must give labels out. I just didn't like she called me that - it's like she had to make an issue of it.

Another mum also implied I was a spinster. She married very late in life and I think she was relieved.

It's also this notion of being left ''on the shelf''. What tosh. One of my best mates just got married to a man she met on the internet and she is 60! Anything is possible at any age nowadays.

BitOfFun Thu 05-Nov-09 22:30:38

Are you baring your breasts for cable tv during the American Spring Break much? Because then you could call yourself a bachelorette...


LyraSilvertongue Thu 05-Nov-09 22:40:29

So would i be considered a spinster as I have never married, although I do have a partner and two children? I guess when the term was common you didn't have people living together as they do today.

Aranea Thu 05-Nov-09 22:45:39

No Lyra, I think you'd be a Fallen Woman...

BLEEPyouYOUbleepingBLEEP Thu 05-Nov-09 22:46:06

Perhaps it's not whether spinster/bachelorette should be used, but why is your friend calling you that?? It's a pretty weird thing for anyone to say, apart from if they were just mucking about and joshing with you? and it doesn't sound like you have that kind of friendship with her.

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