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AIBU?

forgot title earlier.....But AIBU?

4 replies

LadyEvenstarsCauldren · 31/10/2009 17:26

OK, I know I am probably being a BIT unreasonable.

I have a friend who i have been friends with for 13yrs now, she is like family, she is DS2's godmother, we take her on holiday, days out as part of the family etc.

Well after months of unempoyment after being made redundant she has found a new job...excellent news, (this was 3 1/2months ago now). Anyway, since starting this job, she has in many ways ditched me. She will come down and stay the odd weekend as always. BUT today is a fine example...

2 months ago we began planning our halloween party and she has known about it the whole time, been up for it, looking forward to it etc, i even went as far as not inviting someone she doesn't get on with iyswim? so she calls me at 9am today to say she will be down but probably won't be staying for party as she is hung over from the night out she had with work last night.

This is the 8th time she has done this since starting this job. I know I probably sound jealous but its just that whenever i asked her to go out for a drink before starting work she couldn't because her DP would moan about it yet now she is out almost every weekend

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kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 31/10/2009 17:35

I don't think you are being unreasonable. Sounds like she's not so interested now she has something she'd rather be doing and is taking you for granted. enjoy your party and don't invite her round for a while and let her come to you and make an effort for you when she realises she misses you.

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WhereYouLeftIt · 31/10/2009 18:10

YA perhaps B a bit U. You've known her for 13 years, how was she when she was in her last job? Perhaps the culture of her new workplace is very intense, and having been through redundancy she is overly sensitive to fitting in to the new place as much as possible?

You also mention about her coming down and staying the odd weekend though, so is she single/childless? Are you perhaps expecting a bit too much of her dancing attendance on you and your family? How often do you visit her?

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6feetundertheGroundhogs · 31/10/2009 18:30

WYLI: I think your first para may be right, it could be pressure to conform, fit in.. especially as she is probably only just now through her probation period?

2nd para I don't buy, she wouldn't in a million years consent to go on holidays if she had a problem with 'dancing attention' on OP and her family ()

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LadyEvenstarsCauldren · 01/11/2009 14:12

WYLI, its her that determines when she comes down/stays etc.

I don't visit her often simply for the fact that her flat is too small for us all to be in there.
She is not single although she is childfree.

6Feet, she actually hates the job, although she gets on with some of the people.

Anyway she styed for the party last night and we had a briliant time, she and i had a chat about things and all is ok .

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