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To think that it is cruel not to allow your children to go trick or treating?

(273 Posts)
treatortrick Sat 31-Oct-09 16:34:50

And mean not to open the door to trick or treaters?

Friend has told her children that they cannot go trick or treating as it is begging. hmm

She has also said she will not be opening the door to anyone who comes calling.

Her children are missing out and IMO this is cruel.

famishedass Sat 31-Oct-09 16:37:16

well if she doesn't want to do it that's up to her and she certainly doesn't have to open her door to anyone at any time.

However, I do think that if you're not going to "do" hallowe'en, at least take the kids to the cinema or bowling or something.

LynetteScavo Sat 31-Oct-09 16:37:29


YABU - 'tis hardly cruel. What are they missing out on...a lot of crappy sweets?

I have a stash of goodies to give a way, but am secretly hoping no one comes knocking so I can eat them myself. grin

TeamEdward Sat 31-Oct-09 16:38:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JANEITEPatrickNormanMcHennesy Sat 31-Oct-09 16:40:49

YABU and silly. My children are not allowed to go trick or treating because I will not allow them to bother strangers and I will not open the door to trick or treaters because I do not want to be bothered by strangers' children either. So sue me.

MuttOfTheBaskervilles Sat 31-Oct-09 16:42:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

UnquietDad Sat 31-Oct-09 16:42:30

Why do people have to do things just because "everybody" does? That way lies insanity.

PeedOffWithNits Sat 31-Oct-09 16:42:31

no its not cruel, its one of the many decisions parents make for their kids. am I cruel never to feed mine McD's, or am I cruel to allow them the occasional <whispers> ^fruit shoot^

far crueller to give kids an overload of crap on one day and get them EXPECTING sweets from people who have no obligation at all to give them

"cruelty" to children is real and rife, so get worked up about soemthing that MATTERS

PootleTheFlump Sat 31-Oct-09 16:43:50

YABU. Plenty of people have concerns about their children begging for sweets from strangers. Plenty of householders do not have children or are elderly/infirm/have pets and find having to answer the door repeatedly to people they don't know, dressed in sometimes frightening and anonymising (sp?) masks etc difficult or scary.

I agree with famished though, if I lived in an area where it was very common, I would make an effort to have a diversionary activity.

FiveGoMadonTheDanceFloor Sat 31-Oct-09 16:43:54

Ohh I have been labelled cruel.

Cluckyagain Sat 31-Oct-09 16:45:01

Cruel here too....we have DVD's and crisps instead.

WinkyWinkola Sat 31-Oct-09 16:45:02

Cruel? I don't think it's cruel at all. I don't fancy trawling the streets on a wet, October evening either.

It's quite sweet if the children that do come around have gone to the effort of dressing up. I'm not mad on trick or treat - the principle of if you don't give me what I want, I'll throw yoghurt at your door. It can also be quite intimidating if older children are knocking on little old ladies doors.

Much better idea to have a Hallowe'en party at home imo but I have got a bowl of sweeties ready for the monsters that come round.

OP, how do you feel about carol singing at people's doors then? We get some really piss poor efforts coming round here and they hold out their hands for money which annoys me a bit.

Jamieandhismagictorch Sat 31-Oct-09 16:45:22

I fecking hate Halloween. I never used to open my door before I had DCs. The last 2 years I took the DCs out, to trick or treat, but only to houses we know. They get a thrill out of dressing up and being out in the dark, but I do find the whole "begging" feeling distasteful.

This year they wanted to stay in and hand out sweets, (which is nice of them), and DH agreed to arrange a little "at home" for a few people to come round. SO, I'm making the most of it for my DCS sake

No, I wouldn't say it is "cruel".

UnquietDad Sat 31-Oct-09 16:45:26

I think it's very common. That's why I don't like it.

LetThereBeRock Sat 31-Oct-09 16:46:10

I don't think it's cruel. I was never allowed to go trick or treating,though we did give out treats and it never bothered me,much as I love Halloween.

I don't get the anti Halloween people though I admit.

LetThereBeRock Sat 31-Oct-09 16:46:32


UnquietDad Sat 31-Oct-09 16:47:25

Yes, Pootle said "if you live in an area where it is very common" I was agreeing.

JANEITEPatrickNormanMcHennesy Sat 31-Oct-09 16:48:22

I am not anti-Halloween in the slightest - just anti T or T. That said, we are doing nothing this year. In the past, we've had the girls' friends round for a Halloween tea and DVD.

almostreal Sat 31-Oct-09 16:48:26

YABU It is begging.

pointyhat Sat 31-Oct-09 16:48:30

Of course it's not cruel.

SHows a certain inability to have fun though wink

LetThereBeRock Sat 31-Oct-09 16:48:36

We should really have a quote button here.

PlumpkinScaryBaps Sat 31-Oct-09 16:49:34

Ds1 has never been trick or treating and I doubt ds2 will ever, either. It makes me feel uncomfortable, somehow.

I'm also not keen on opening the door to them, however I do have some sweets to give out to the little children who are accompanied by adults and who've made an effort with their costumes. I will NOT give to the surly teenagers who have put on a 'spooky' headband and expect to be given treats- even if it does mean that our front door will be egged. Again.

(The same also applies to teenagers posing as carol singers who sing the first line of 'We wish you a merry Christmas' out of time and out of tune and then stand expectantly waiting for cash.)

<old grump>

badietbuddy Sat 31-Oct-09 16:51:04

YABU. It's a horrible tradition that has crept in n the last 20 years or so (I am 26 and it was unheard of when I was young). And yes, I'm sure its very nice and innocent, I just don't see why we should let our dc knock on strangers doors and expect them to give them something

PoppyIsApain Sat 31-Oct-09 16:51:37

I have got sweets in for trick or treating, really want to go to this ghost train/food thing thats on but cant afford it so will be sitting at home sulking sad
My ds is too young to go trick or treating and my db is too old sad

LilyBolero Sat 31-Oct-09 16:51:38

Well I must be very cruel then, NO WAY am I letting my kids go out trick or treating, I hate it. I hate the idea of them going round houses and saying something that is basically 'give me something or I will play a trick on you'. Nice way to bring up children.

And to people who say 'it's just fun' - well the people whose doors they knock on don't have an 'opt-out' - they either have to pretend not to be there or answer the door.

Inability to have fun - no, just don't want my kids roaming the neighbourhood requesting treats from our lovely neighbours.

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