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to be sick of work making me feel like a naughty kid for being pregnant!

(22 Posts)
TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied Fri 30-Oct-09 19:18:32

I am a contractor so I waited until I was 18 weeks pregnant and my contract was secured at work before I told them I was pregnant. I then walked in on my boss bitching about me to another member of staff saying how is she meant to cover my hours etc etc.

I told personel and they seemed ok at first but I had to call back in to tell them when I'd told my boss. I did and sort of jokey 'oh my word, how cringey' told them that I'd walked in on boss shouting about it and had banged a chair so that she realised I was there. Both members of staff in personel said 'right' and quickly moved on with a completely different tone to how they had spoken to me only half an hour before.

Since then they keep pestering me to go to lectures when I'm working and they copy my boss into the e-mail to try and get me into trouble for not going.

Then they have started pestering me to get my degree certificate to them. I have worked there over 2 years and never been asked to get my degree cert to them. They are saying that they've given me 'long enough' and if inspectors see that they have been 'chasing me for 12 months' it won't look good. How the hell was I supposed to know they wanted it?

All the e-mails and bitchy and have taken on a very formal tone. I also feel like when I walk into the office at work everyone is weird with me.

Why should I be made to feel guilty for having a family?

echt Fri 30-Oct-09 19:35:15

Are the lectures compulsory? If they are and you can get into trouble about not going to them, then go.

As for the stuff about the degree certificate, contact them formally in writing to note that this is the first time you've been asked about this and that you would like to see the evidence of them "chasing" you about it.

Do you have a written record of what your boss said, what Personnel, said, and then their changed behaviour? Note it all.

They are after you. Your complaint was legitimate, so they're now looking for legitimate ways of getting back at you. Don't be in the wrong, here.

Post this on Employment /jobs thread as well.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

famishedass Fri 30-Oct-09 19:40:55

I don't entirely understand what it is you're objecting to.

Is it a problem to go to lectures when they send you? Can you give them a copy of your degree certificate.

So your boss was having a moan about you. It happens. Have you never moaned about a colleague?

YABU and totally over-sensitive.

Congratulations on your pregnancy though.

ln1981 Fri 30-Oct-09 19:42:22

Hi there, I dont really know much about this area but I agree with echt. Make sure you keep a note of everything thats going on just in case the proverbial hits the fan. Good luck and congrats on your pregnancy.

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied Fri 30-Oct-09 19:45:04

They put on lectures on specific days and I have to go to about 6 of them but I'm always working and the boss can't get cover so doesn't want me to go. She has e-mailed them to say that I can go to the next one but that I have to arrange my own cover with a specific person.

I can't find the degree certificate- I was only told I need to give it to them last week. They have e-mailed to say i need to pay for a new one which isn't a problem, but it's the way they're asking, saying they've been chasing me for a year etc. That's not true. It's like they're trying to send all these e-mails highlighting my 'incompetency' so that they can use them against me. Also, the e-mails are not written how the girl who sent them usually writes. I suspect it is a team effort my personel.

I just feel like I've got to fear for my job just because I want to have a baby.

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied Fri 30-Oct-09 19:45:24

They put on lectures on specific days and I have to go to about 6 of them but I'm always working and the boss can't get cover so doesn't want me to go. She has e-mailed them to say that I can go to the next one but that I have to arrange my own cover with a specific person.

I can't find the degree certificate- I was only told I need to give it to them last week. They have e-mailed to say i need to pay for a new one which isn't a problem, but it's the way they're asking, saying they've been chasing me for a year etc. That's not true. It's like they're trying to send all these e-mails highlighting my 'incompetency' so that they can use them against me. Also, the e-mails are not written how the girl who sent them usually writes. I suspect it is a team effort my personel.

I just feel like I've got to fear for my job just because I want to have a baby.

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied Fri 30-Oct-09 19:46:27

Also, they haven't bothered doing a risk assessment and I am now 24 weeks.

PavlovtheWitchesCat Fri 30-Oct-09 19:53:56

It is illegal for them to not do a H&S risk assessment as soon as you notify them you are pg.

Keep records as already said. It might be that you are being ovrersensitive, but i suspect you might be right. And given that in both my pregnancies i have suffered discrimination/underhand tactics, for the same organisation and know others who have as well, it is unfortunately not uncommon.

Give them NO reason to complain about everything and ask them to evidence when they first asked for your degree certs.

I personally would also note in writing that you feel unsettled by gossip behind your back. If you put it in writing now, you have evidence later that you raised concerns, so if anything else happens, you can go back and say 'on this date, I expressed concerns of bullying on grounds of pg' if nothing else happens, you have lost nothing.

famishedass Fri 30-Oct-09 19:54:57

Do you know what, it sounds as though you're being insufferably precious about your pregnancy and that they can't please you no matter what. Taking offence because a member of staff dared to ask you for something you can't find shock.

Can't go to lectures or don't wanna go hmm coz it involves putting yourself out a little bit?

Why do you need a risk assessment - do you work in an office or are you a deep-sea diver? Exactly what do you think you're at risk from.

echt Fri 30-Oct-09 20:01:09

famished - read what the OP has said about the lectures and sudden interest in her degree certificate.

The risk assessment is legal requirement, not a personal whim on the part of the OP.

famishedass Fri 30-Oct-09 20:03:55

Maybe the lectures and degree certificate weren't important before because she was only a contractor. Perhaps they are only important now she's officially on the payroll and that's why they're asking now.

Although, I agree 100% they won't like the fact they have to give someone maternity leave, it's tough, they have to do it and she has to do her job.

HappyMummyOfOne Fri 30-Oct-09 20:06:09

They are probably peeved that they secured your contract before telling them of the pg even though you knew.

The things seem pretty small and nothing major. Yes the risk assessment is a legal requirement but if you are office based its just procedural.

PavlovtheWitchesCat Fri 30-Oct-09 20:06:19

I did not read anything that the OP has said to indicate that she has not been, or is unwilling to do her job though?

Tough on the employer sure, but not a reason to treat a member of staff badly, or differently now she is pg.

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied Fri 30-Oct-09 20:08:53

I've always been hourly paid (so it counts as contractor even though I am paid through them IYSWIM).

I had to secure my contract as I have a family to provide for and couldn't risk suddenly being out of a job and losing my house etc whilst pregnant. I intend to take 7 months off work as this will then take me into september next year when i would usually be reviewed and re-employed, but it says in my maternity pack that they have to employ me in terms no less favourable and I have to work with them for 3 months or pay my maternity back.

PavlovtheWitchesCat Fri 30-Oct-09 20:14:44

happymumofone, they might be minor/petty or small BUT, these things add up. In my employment, small things crept up, more, and more, and more. Hard to say anything at first as they seemed so silly, like it was just me. Until I noted it all, kept a diary and clearly evidenced bad practice and discrimination. And they did not learn.

And the RA is not a formality. You need to ensure break/rest areas are identified, not all offices have them, need to address any underlying medical needs as a result of pg, its not just about the work place being unsafe, but about how the work might impact on pg related issues, for example i had hyperemesis so severely i was medicated to stabilise it. It was identified in my RA what action should be taken to ensure i was able to continue to do my job during the time i was very unwell - included reduced hours, temp change of role and I am office based - it also covers things like carrying of files - i had not considered this myself, but i usually lug around big boxes of files into training groups, and i was supplied with a pull along trolley one to avoid pulling muscles, make sure I knew safe fire routes that were accessible as i grew less able to walk down stairs (and can't use lifts in cases of fire).

memorylapse Fri 30-Oct-09 20:26:03

This info should help re the Risk Assesment

http://www.hse.gov.uk/pubns/indg373.pdf

moomaa Fri 30-Oct-09 20:54:13

This all sounds like an over reaction to me. If I worked in personnel and someone mentioned that boss's reaction in a 'sort of jokey way' I might be unsure whether they were complaining or not and would make sure I did everything by the book for that person in case they were the complaining type and were going to cause trouble. That might include making sure they go to the compulosry lectures and their file was complete.

The boss's reaction was unprofessional but not that surprising.

loobylu3 Fri 30-Oct-09 21:05:22

Hopefully, you are being (quite understandably) a little oversensitive. However, if I were you, I would definitely keep a copy of all those e mails plus any that you had previously requesting your certificate or otherwise. I would also keep a record of the conversation that you overheard your boss having (with dates) and anything else that you feel is relevant. If it transpires that you are being oversensitive, there is no harm done

lisianthus Sat 31-Oct-09 08:42:56

Don't just keep a copy of the correspondence, make sure that you respond, clearly stating that the first time you were asked for the degree certificate was last week and that you have requested one and will send it to them as soon as you receive it. You need to make it really clear that this is the case, as otherwise, anyone looking at the paper trail later on will just see correspondence stating that they have been chasing you for a year and nothing contradicting that from you. If that is the case, the reasonable assumption would be that this is true.

Are the lectures work-related or maternity-related? If they are work-related it seems weird that you are the only one being required to attend and the requirement only started once you made them aware of your pregnancy.

maledetta Sat 31-Oct-09 13:58:26

Hmmm....it sounds like you work in higher/further education- am I right?

IMO HE/FE establishments can be absolute bearpits, rife with nasty politics- not what you'd expect from a bunch of intelligent, highly educated individuals- or is it?

I still shudder to recall the personnel dept. of the college where I worked.

Take no prisoners!

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied Sat 31-Oct-09 18:09:28

Yep- Further Education and I'm really quite worried.

Lectures are work related and we all have to go but some of us work all the time and don't get chance. The e-mail stated that two of us have to go to them and my boss said that they will have to take one this term- me, and one next term. It's a few things that have added up and kind of an intuition.

They may have overlooked the risk assessment as I never talk about being pregnant and just rush around doing my job, but even so, I think there's something fishy going on.

porcamiseria Mon 02-Nov-09 09:20:10

i agree that you should take this seriously, and track all correspondance. They are being nasty, fight fire with fire. I am sorry, its shitty

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