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to think DH is an arsehole considering I have just been sterilised?

(31 Posts)
bonnyb1 Thu 29-Oct-09 13:04:01

Ok he is bugging me now - I was sterilised on Tues because DH chickened out of being done himself, so I had it done because I am sick of having crap times with every form of contrapception known to man. I thought he might have took one for the team so to speak, seeing as I have had two c-sections, but no, too squeamish about having his family jewels messed with.
Anyway he has(rather grudgingly in my opinion) taken 2 days off work to care for the children, but I have not so much as had a bar of bloody dairy milk, let alone something as generous as a bunch of flowers. He has gone shopping with my eldest DD so this is his last chance to redeem himself, otherwise I am going to .............I don't know, sulk probably. Bah! It's still quite bloody painful too angry

I made sure I spelt it out to DH when I got sterilised that I expected copious amounts of chocolate, magazines, to be waited on ahnd and foot, etc. When he burnt the pizza for tea the first night I sobbed and sobbed.

Hope you feel better soon and that he brings you back some chocolate.

Missy8c Thu 29-Oct-09 13:11:31

YANBU...he is being an arsehole. I'd be pissed that he didn't have the snip himself tbh but given that you obviously agreed at the final decision together I guess you are where you are. My OH is a bit thoughtless in that way too. It's like he needs telling how to be just a tiny bit sensitive. I put it down to him being a 'geek' and having a logical rather than emotional brain! lol.
Anyway, let's hope he returns with a massive bouquet and I wish you well xx

SorciereAnna Thu 29-Oct-09 13:11:52

Call his mother/sister/aunt and ask her to ring him up and tell him to treat you with the tlc you deserve.

bonnyb1 Thu 29-Oct-09 13:24:36

Hmm he is back now, with no chocolate etc, not even the bloody magazine I asked him to get! (he couldn't find it) pathetic. Don't know why I bothered to get tubes clipped cos it will be the 12th of bloody never before he gets any.

carriedababi Thu 29-Oct-09 13:27:40

what an arsehole

sorry hes treating you like that

<passes virtual coco>

Missy8c Thu 29-Oct-09 13:29:39

Haha to your last comment bonny! Give me his number....I'll tell him the score! LOL

diddl Thu 29-Oct-09 13:35:09

My husband had a choice-use condoms or have a vasectomy.

He chose the later!

Told him if I could "bear" to give birth he could "bear" to have a vasectomy.

YANBU-mind you,I didn´t buy him flowers or chocolatesblush

And had to talk him into the day off after the op as well!

carriedababi Thu 29-Oct-09 13:38:35

forgive me for being so nosey, but how do they tie tubes, go up via the fanjo or cut you open?

iwascyteenagewerewolf Thu 29-Oct-09 13:39:54

his credit card

+

your internet connection

=

all your materials needs met at his expense

Lilyloooohhhh Thu 29-Oct-09 13:42:15

YADNBU lol at why you bothered

bonnyb1 Thu 29-Oct-09 13:44:11

carriedababi - they do keyhole urgery, go in by your belly button come out in the middle of my d section scar. The student nurse showed me a picture of the clips inside me, I saw my own ovaries, that was a shock I can tell you!

bonnyb1 Thu 29-Oct-09 13:45:00

ha ha that is 'surgery' and 'c section', hard to type lay down!

bonnyb1 Thu 29-Oct-09 13:47:00

i'm not joking about the twelth of never, he will be blowing the cobwebs of his bits before he sees any action lol

carriedababi Thu 29-Oct-09 13:47:45

shock thats major to me.

he def derserves a slap. the rotton swine

Fibilou Thu 29-Oct-09 19:06:33

I join with those saying he is being a prize nob.

ThisPhantomPlopsPumpkins Thu 29-Oct-09 19:11:03

Yes he's being a nobber.

Hope you feel better soon!

nappyzonecantrunfortoffee Thu 29-Oct-09 19:11:24

lol - my dh is a wimpy arse also and i was considering it myself but worry aboutt he 1 in 200 failure rate as that would be me for sure - did your clips look nice and secure - i think seeing them would be more reassuring - was it? I love your humour bonny! I am going for abstaining at the moment but keep falling off the wagon blush.

MrsToffeeCrisp Thu 29-Oct-09 19:12:21

YANBU

Think you may need to show him this thread!

ConnieComplaint Thu 29-Oct-09 20:35:20

My dh is very thoughtless too. Not purposely, he just does not think.

DD is 8 & I still remind him most days about not buying me flowers when she was born.... though to be fair, she was born at 5.30pm on C'mas eve, when most shops would have been closed anyway....

I'd just tell him though - or get one of the kids to do it!!

alicet Thu 29-Oct-09 21:11:35

See maybe I'm low maintenance but I would be happy that he had taken the kids out so i could relax!

Dh didn't buy me flowers when ds's were born and tbh I was happy that he was there with me for all the time he was actually allowed and I am glad he was there rather than in the shops looking for flowers.

Not saying i don't understand where you are coming from - just my pov.

I do get why you are p*ssed off he didn't take one for the team - I too had 2 sections and if we were considering something irreversible it would def be my dh. Thankfully he agrees!

bonnyb1 Fri 30-Oct-09 22:41:10

hi nappyzone - I too was concerned about the failure rate but somehow I managed to blag a private hospital on the nhs and got 2 clips each side! Today the gas problem is killing me - they pump you up with air for the op, and somehow it gets onto your shoulders and it kills. Been popping the windeze all day to no avail. Red wine seems to be helping though...........
I'm with you on the low maintainance alicet but sometimes he just takes the piss - wasn't really expecting flowers, but a few cuppas and a bit of tea would have been nice! I did text him to tell him I was pissed off, he apologised profusely by text and now is keeping well out of my way which is probably making it worse smile

6feetundertheGroundhogs Fri 30-Oct-09 22:46:59

Get yourself a couple of housebricks..

and tell him that unless he spoils you rotten, you'll be performing his sterilisation YOURSELF....

Twintummy Fri 30-Oct-09 22:48:33

All I can say is INTERNET SHOPPING AND HIS CREDIT CARD!!! My DH is lovely but a thoughtless sod so I've bought countless anniversary, birthday and meday presents with his card and it's fab.

Hope you recover quickly soon. I'm thinking about it but I'm scared.

bonnyb1 Fri 30-Oct-09 22:53:34

i never allow him to get me presents like xmas or birthday without a list of potentials - last time I gave him free reign he bought me a swimming costume and an umbrella for xmas!! now you see what I'm up against.........
The credit card thing goes without saying but as I am in charge of house budget he doesn't really notice the impact it will just be me who is fretting about paying it.
I was a bit scared twintummy but i must say now the discomfort is wearing off I can't believe i will never ever have to worry about pills or coils or condoms ever again! It's quite liberating really.

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