my partner and i are not married have been together a very long time aibu

[loveme]

to feel sad that my friends are all getting married before me im happy for them but jealous because we cant afford it yet we are saving to buy a house, im not workingwhich would help and im going to be a old bride by the time it comes to me, I feel like its never going to happen aibu.

[mumblechum]

Why does it need to cost that much?

If it's just being married that you want you can do it for next to nothing.

If you want a big fussy white wedding which will cost thousands, that's another matter.

You need to decide whether you want to be a bride or a wife. Not necessarily the same thing!

[rimmer08]

no you are not being unreasonable to want this. you do not say how old you are though?you are never too old to be a bride- have you and DP talked about this?

[posieparksherbroom]

Loveme, I got married for under £300. The registry office was £40 and my dress was from Monsoon. I just wanted to be married, perhaps you could do something similar and ask all you friends to join you for a meal/drink after (they can pay and no wedding gifts). We bought our rings in Thailand and so not too expensive either.

[mankyscotslass]

Agree with mumblechum.

We got married at registry office then home for lunch, then out for family ta at a lcoal restuarant, cost less than £100!

No fuss no frills, but I am officially Mrs Manky, which is what we wanted.

If I wanted all the fuss and frills it would have cost a fortune, and we decided it was not important to us.

[mankyscotslass]

Out for tea at a local restaurant!

I need to concentrate on my spelling.

[loveme]

I dont want a big fuss I want to be his wife and that is all that matters to me,we have 2 lovely children, they can be my pageboy and bridesmaid.Im 35 years old xx

[mankyscotslass]

So just get a licence and do it then?

I had no fancy dress and no fuss but we were happy!

Licence is not that expensive, so why not do it?

[loveme]

your right I should look into it and i will thank you xx

[sayithowitis]

Well, if you just want to be married, I believe that can be arranged with minimal cost, even if you want to be married in church there is no rule that says you must have the full -big white dress-full choir-23 hour peal of bells-sit down meal for 150- with an extra 500 in the evening-plus a six week homeymoon in the maldives- type of wedding! I am sure you could get married at a very reasonable cost for licence, registrars offic/church/clothes etc. Flowers can usually be found at reasonable prices from market stalls, or ven in supermarkets. especially since the trend these days appears to be much less frormal than when I got married (350 years ago ), it would not be too hard to buy a bunch, trim them and then tie them yourself. Cake? Buy the plain white iced ones they sell in Tesco's or M&S and add a few decorations of your own, you can buy pre-made icing flowers etc in cake decorating shops. photos? Give your guests a disposable camera each and ask them to snap away. Afterwards, once developed, you can scan them into the computer and upload them to one of those sites that make your pictures into books for aroun £40. ( Used one myself this year and was very impressed with the quality). Food? depending on numbers, either as someone else said a meal out asking guests to pay their own way but no other presents, or get some party platters from one of the may supermarkets or cash and carry places that do them.

or just go and get married with your OH, children and a couple of witnesses and tell everyone afterwards.
It is entirely up to you, but it can be done!

Good luck and I wish you every happiness!