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to not pay any money for this?

(34 Posts)
AChocolateDigestive Mon 19-Oct-09 12:22:23

DP nad I don't live together- he lives with 4 other young professionals in a house.

They planned a housewarming party and had it on Friday night. Woman who lives with DP bouht lots of alcohol - but the invite was 'bring a bottle'. Party began at 7pm, by 9pm when I came people were piling into taxis to go out. Nobody invited my DP or me. DP had to stay to 'mind' the house because a few people at party really hadn't planned to go out. DP was not asked whether he minded staying. Of course he didn't mind and would not have minded if he had been asked, but I could tell he was upset all his friends left without him and not asked if he minded looking after house.
Anyway, the few stragglers left at about midnight so DP and I left to mine. At 6am received a text from woman he lives with 'where are my wine bottles?'. Luckily didn't wake DP up and I didn't respond, had no idea where wine was.
Next day she sends a text 'you owe me money for alcohol' So he rings and asks what money, she said she had bottles of alcohol and it all got drank at party so my DP has to pay for it/ buy her new alcohol.

Not sure why my DP needs to foot the bill really but she is now being very difficult. He and I are struggling for money at the moment, he really can't afford to pay her. He feels he should for an easy life but my point is- if you but lots of alcohol on a table at a party people will drink it. If you don't want to share you don't put it all out. Why should my DP pay when he was left to look after the house while they all went out and had a good time, and he didn't even drink it!! What's more she was so impolite in the messages!


Hope that all made sense!

IMoveTheStarsForNoOne Mon 19-Oct-09 12:24:45


cheeky cow.

emsyj Mon 19-Oct-09 12:25:26

If you invite people to a party and then swan off out leaving a number of guests in your house then you have to expect they will drink your drink/eat your food/make a mess. She needs to grow up. YANBU.

colditz Mon 19-Oct-09 12:27:36

The correct answer is


"Get to fuck you grasping bitch"

ben5 Mon 19-Oct-09 12:27:45

that'll teach her to leave it out!! don't pay her anything

seaglass Mon 19-Oct-09 12:28:12

YANBU, but I think your DP needs to be a bit more assertive - it sounds like he's being walked all over by his housemates

Chickenshavenolips Mon 19-Oct-09 12:29:31

grin @ colditz

Ronaldinhio Mon 19-Oct-09 12:30:22

did she discuss buying some booze to get the party started with the others before the decided to have a housewarming?

i think that that is fairly standard
buy a bit of booze and some nibbles as hospitable hosts for the guests whom you have invited.

If she is suggesting that they all share the costs then that sounds reasonable
suggest that to your dp

BalloonSlayer Mon 19-Oct-09 12:31:00

Maybe your DP should text her back with

I didn't drink it, perhaps you should ask -then a list of all the people left at the party - for the money.

By the time she has asked all of them they'll all know what a grasping weirdo she is.


AChocolateDigestive Mon 19-Oct-09 12:33:51

Ronaldihio- they did all contribute to a punch and nibbles etc but not to this alcohol which she bought.

I told him he was a 'walkover' which went down badly. grin. I want to ring her and tell her off for being such a bloody selfish bitch! But obviously he doesn't need me to fight his battles.

Blondeshavemorefun Mon 19-Oct-09 12:34:42

yanbu but your dp does need to stand up for himself

you host a party, you buy drinks, you bugger off, drinks get drunk

sounds normal to me smile

you say he was upset that his friends left without him

and that it was a party but you and dp (who live in the house) were not invited

what kind of friends does he have? hmm

if you and dp are struggling for money maybe he should move in with you and save paying rent twice?

AChocolateDigestive Mon 19-Oct-09 12:45:02

Rubbish friends obviously. That is the plan for next year but he is on a year contract which he can't get out of. To be honest he will be glad to leave there.

HowlingAtTheMoon Mon 19-Oct-09 12:47:04

What a stupid cow. Tell her to feck off.

AChocolateDigestive Mon 19-Oct-09 12:49:09

Ha I am glad we agree on this! Silly girl, she needs to grow up and join the real world. She fell out with all her housemates in her last house and now I can see why.

bramblebooks Mon 19-Oct-09 12:51:27

So she arranged a party (not with DP?), didn't invite DP but expects DP to foot the bill? Who does she think she is? Paris Hilton?

upahill Mon 19-Oct-09 12:55:20

Top answers ballonslayer and Colditz!!
Some funny folk out there!!!

Inghouls2 Mon 19-Oct-09 12:57:38

Cheeky Mare!
Tell her you didn't drink it, and if she was so worried about the wine, she should have stayed at home to mind it!
Some people...

cupcake123 Mon 19-Oct-09 12:59:37

Tell her you asked the internet and it said no.

Blondeshavemorefun Mon 19-Oct-09 13:01:26

pmsl cupcake [fgrin]

SCARYspicemonster Mon 19-Oct-09 13:03:39

Tell her you saw someone gathering it up with them when they got in one of the cabs so assumed she'd taken it

TheMightyToosh Mon 19-Oct-09 13:03:44

Tell her you didn't drink it so you're not paying for it! If she wants it paid for, she will have to chase up all the people at the party to make a contribution.

Stupid cow

Blu Mon 19-Oct-09 13:06:17

e mail:

Dear Flatmate,
I cannot begin to understand why you think i owe you an money. You went out and left your wine on a communal 'help yourself' party table. You then left me to mind the hosue, I can only assume that your friends who were left behind drank the wine, because I didn't. Also, as the invite said 'bring a bottle' (which I did, and drank none of yours) there was no discussion about a central contribution to wine.

If you wanted your wine to be there when you got back you should have put it away before you went out.
Best wishes,

ImSoNotTelling Mon 19-Oct-09 13:10:33

shock when can he move out?

They sounds like horrible flatmates sad

FatFree Mon 19-Oct-09 13:12:08

*clears throat*

I'd say "piss off you cheeky bitch!!"

mayorquimby Mon 19-Oct-09 13:16:39

never has "go fuck yourself" been such an applicable reply.

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