I didn't really want my first post, after months of lurking, to be an AIBU, but this has really bothered me. I was on the bus home with my children this afternoon (out of necessity, by the way - I'd been somewhere that's 5 miles from home, and has no parking, so walking or driving were out of the questiion), and my son had been sitting down, when an elderly lady got on, who clearly needed the seat. So I asked him to come and stand by my buggy (which is really stable, and has good brakes, therefore safer to hold onto than nothing, or a hand, which was all that was available) and hold onto it. Which he did. At which point an elderly man sitting behind me proceeded to have a massive go at me for not holding his hand, told me I shouldn't be allowing him to walk around the bus (he only walked from the seat to the buggy so an old lady could sit, ffs), told me he'd get hurt and mess up everyone's journey, that I wasn't capable of looking after him, should go 'back to school to learn how to look after my children' and was a bad mother. I probably shouldn't have responded to him in the first place (to tell him to back off and that it was none of his business, and that my son was holding on and I was hardly likely to let him hurt himself) and granted, I probably shouldn't have called him a horrible old man, or, eventually shouted LOOK, JUST BUTT OUT PLEASE (hell, at least I said please) but AIBU to be upset? I mean, IMPE, holding someone's hand on the bus is actually not very safe, and tends to create human dominoes if the bus moves off suddenly. It's surely better to be holding on to something that's unlikely to move. Oh, and nobody else(none of the adults, anyway - my 4yo turned round and said 'oh shut up you horrid man' - which I probably shouldn't be proud of him for, but I am) bothered to tell him to leave me alone. They waited until he'd got OFF the bus to make sure I was ok - I wasn't - I'd had a shitty day, have bad PMT, had a migraine coming, and was trying my hardest to keep everything together and not lose my essential last-minute shopping (toilet roll), purse, keys or children, and therefore ended up in floods of tears, feeling like a total twat. My husband thinks I overreacted. So, did I? Am I endangering the bus journeys of many and the life of my children by insisting my son (who, at 4, is 3ft 8 and 2 stone, and perfectly capable pf sending me flying) holds onto static objects and gets up for old ladies? Should I have fallen down and thanked him for his considered, politely delivered parenting advice? In short, AIBU? Well, am I?
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AIBU?
to be upset by this old man?
36 replies
whydobirdssuddenlyappear · 08/10/2009 19:47
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