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To have asked this woman to come and get her child?

(32 Posts)
deaddei Tue 06-Oct-09 09:19:31

Going to local leisure centre about 4.30 last night, there was a small child- about 15 months old, barefoot, crying as if his heart would break. He was only just walking- kept falling over after a few steps. NO sign of parent. This is a busy area- car park, road, and people just walked by him.
I got dcs to stay with him and ran round the corner to see if I could see the parent. About 20 yards up the hill is a woman with a buggy. I called - is this your child- and she said yes, he wouldn't get in the buggy. I said you can't leave a baby here- do you want a hand getting him in.
She came back and dragged him along by the hand so he was half on floor, half not- and this kid had nothing on his feet.
Now we've all been there with the rigid child refusing to get in buggy- but you don't leave a baby ffs like that.
She didn't seem particularly bothered- not with me for "interfering"- or about child. I did do the right thing didn't I?

sarah293 Tue 06-Oct-09 09:20:51

Message withdrawn

Alibooobaandthe40Phantoms Tue 06-Oct-09 09:23:05

That is so sad, that is the same age as my DS, just a baby still

You definitely did the right thing.

Firawla Tue 06-Oct-09 09:24:58

yanbu!!! she sounds deluded, he's a baby still & that's totally not appropriate for his age, im sure he would not understand that. if they wont get in the buggy, you just have to make them get in the buggy or just pick them up and carry them, how can you walk off, anything could have happened to him. she is crazy. my ds is the same age & would never cross my mind to do that

Poledra Tue 06-Oct-09 09:37:16

You did the right thing - I have done the carrying-screaming-toddler-under-arm-while-they-make-like-a-plank. It's not nice but you cannot leave them. DD3 is the same age and not walking well yet, and I would not leave her. It is possible to force them into the buggy too, even if it's not ideal. I've had to pin a toddler onto a buggy board with one hand while pushing with the other before sad

paranoidandconfused Tue 06-Oct-09 09:42:52

I find that a knee in the stomach to hold them in whilst you do the straps up always works grin

ds1 was terrible for this but I would never have dreamed of just leaving him in carpark!


paranoidandconfused Tue 06-Oct-09 09:43:24

blush obv I mean just holding them in with your knee not kneeing them in the stomach

edam Tue 06-Oct-09 09:47:19

Ooh, I don't know paranoid, I think I may have crossed the line between knee holding them in and actually kneeing ds once or twice back in the days when he used to do the rigid trick. wink Not deliberately but boy, is it hard to get a reluctant toddler into his buggy!

deaddei, you did exactly the right thing, poor mite.

Numberfour Tue 06-Oct-09 09:51:14

paranoid by name and by nature!!! i understood exactly what you meant because i have done so too - i would rather hold a child in the buggy with my knee while strapping them in than leave them walking and stumbling along yards and yards away at such a tender age.


NikkiH Tue 06-Oct-09 09:53:23

Well done you - totally the right thing to do! Shocked at the mum leaving such a young child in such a dangerous place.

Used to find tickling mine sometimes worked when they refused to get in buggy or car seat failing that a strong arm or strategically placed knee to pin them down!

Bessie123 Tue 06-Oct-09 09:55:25

I have found the trick with the buggy is to hold the middle strap up high between their legs, then the toddler can't slip out of the buggy when they try to slide off it. Works with my dd anyway (although it doesn't stop the screaming)

Bessie123 Tue 06-Oct-09 09:55:49

oh, sorry, and YANBU

katiestar Tue 06-Oct-09 10:06:24

I am most shocked by people just walking past and ignoring him !

Jujubean77 Tue 06-Oct-09 10:09:21

Poor little soul, the dragging barefoot is horrific sad

Mybox Tue 06-Oct-09 10:09:55

Good that you helped - perhaps she could have just carried him if he didn't want his pushchair

IWantAChickAndADuck Tue 06-Oct-09 10:11:51


angry at stupid mother

SardineQueen Tue 06-Oct-09 10:19:57

katie it bothers me too that no-one else was paying ant heed to a teeny by itself crying with no shoes on shock

Could it be that deaddai looked like she was on the case? I hope so.

Agree NBU

Agree re kneeing em in the chest wink

Jux Tue 06-Oct-09 10:24:13

I have left dd when she has refused to co-operate (wasn't strong enough to just put her in) but I wouldn't have gone so far I couldn't see her or get to her in seconds. I did always find that if I said "Well, I'm going, bye bye" she would follow me pretty quick and get in the buggy herself. I would NEVER have let her out of sight though.

Pyrocanthus Tue 06-Oct-09 10:31:57

I agree about the other people. Even if they didn't dare approach the child (how sad, but possible), if the mother was out of sight, someone should have been on the phone to the police. I think this national paranoia about going near a child is sometimes an excuse not to bother to help.

YANBU, deaddei, you did the right thing.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight Tue 06-Oct-09 10:53:27

Fucking stupid woman. Hate when parents are so crap at parenting that they can't just get the child to do as it's told and have that 'what can I do, it won't listen to me' attitude. 15 months old!!! shock You are the mum, get the child in the pushchair! You don't negotiate, you don't try to reason with it, you do what you have to to keep it safe! If that includes a knee to the tummy so be it! I bet she was worried about what people would think of her manhandling the child into the buggy so tried to 'teach it a lesson' by fucking walking off. What a stupid bitch.

(apologies, I'm a bit ranty this morning, not sure why blush )

pigletmania Tue 06-Oct-09 11:03:30

You did the right thing, i would have given the woman a good talking too to boot. My goodness the mentality of some people, they are just not fit to be parents.

ronshar Tue 06-Oct-09 11:08:12

I would have been tempted to take poor baby home with me for a spot of proper parenting.

prettyfly1 Tue 06-Oct-09 11:13:33

oh how sad of course you did - thats awful - barefoot? Cruel.

ArghhhhmazingBouncingSpider Tue 06-Oct-09 11:24:14

I see this alot working in a toy shop, its a nightmare to get them out.
But in the majority of cases when a parent walks off from a child thats not cooperating they wont run after them, they throw themselves to the floor and scream harder so it never works!!
The fact that the poor little child was obviously trying to catch up is horrible.
Good job for interfering.

deaddei Tue 06-Oct-09 13:18:21

Thankyou for your nice dd said "wow that was so cool mum"- I felt like a bit of a hero!!

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