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to have wanted to beat this man with his fecking hoover

(63 Posts)
ElectricElephant Sun 04-Oct-09 22:13:53

Parked in a residentail street. Didn't block any access/driveways/lowered kerbs/double yellows/disabled space/anything. was a public road.

Got back to car to hours later - middle aged man hoovering his car "Oh, it's yours it is?"
"Yes, sorry - would you mind moving your car - you're blocking me in?"
"Sorry, you'll have to wait until I'm finished"

He had blocked me in, both sides, with his car and his wife's.

Explained I needed to get going, he turned his back and switched the hoover back on.


btw, i'd been at the local village hall helping out with a NNS for the toddler group.

What would you have done?

ElectricElephant Sun 04-Oct-09 22:14:57

Sorry for typos.

pjmama Sun 04-Oct-09 22:18:44

Go back tomorrow and park over the end of his drive for a few hours. Pillock.

ElectricElephant Sun 04-Oct-09 22:20:14

He didn't have a drive. I think that was his problem.

Was in tears on the way home.. arsehole.

Feel like signing him up for all sorts of shitty mail shots/leaving filthy nappy on his sparkly car/posting turds through his letterbox.

Why did this bother me so much???

TeamEdwardTango Sun 04-Oct-09 22:20:55

Hoover man, for example, is a twat.

TeamEdwardTango Sun 04-Oct-09 22:22:54

Ah well, there is the issue! You had the blatant cheek to actually park in front of his house, meaning he had to walk an extra 5ft to get to his front door.
I think you were quite inconsiderate.


pjmama Sun 04-Oct-09 22:24:25

Sad little man, leading a sad little life if this is all he has to worry about. Pity him and move on.

Asana Sun 04-Oct-09 22:29:28

I'd have simply said I would have no choice but to call the police as I was being held against my will. Doubt you'd have had a leg to stand on, but I bet he'd have moved the car(s) after much grumbling. YANBU. If I were you, I would park in the exact same spot next week and try my tactic above.

JustAnotherManicMummy Sun 04-Oct-09 22:37:56

Could you have said "Sorry I really can't wait. I have to get back for my curfew but I expect if I jiggle a bit I can get out".

Alternatively, you could have said whilst opening his passenger door, "No problem. You don't mind if I just sit here and chat do you?"

What a tragic little man.

ElectricElephant Sun 04-Oct-09 22:38:01

Asana - I wish I had done just that.

Arsehole. I bet he's some sad little wanker with a boring job and no other outlet for his twatness rage

ElectricElephant Sun 04-Oct-09 22:39:05

JAMM - I said "I really need to get home to my little boy" and he said "sorry, you'll just have to wait"


wish I could let this go, it's seriously bothering me!!!

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight Sun 04-Oct-09 22:39:24

I would have got in my car and proceeded to get out of the space. No matter how small it is you can usually get out with some patience and perseverance - and if you don't mind bumping a few bumpers! wink

What a twat. I also like the calling police idea but I don't think they would have taken you very seriously.

thelunar66 Sun 04-Oct-09 22:43:09

You drove home in tears?? Why?

Did it take him hours to hoover his car out? (takes me 5 mins max)

I don't understand <<puzzled>>

zisforzebra Sun 04-Oct-09 22:43:27

What a tosser. I'm with pjmama - he's clearly got nothing else going on in his life and for that he should be pitied. With an attitude like that, he must live a pretty joyless existence.

ElectricElephant Sun 04-Oct-09 22:44:19

because he was a confrontational, objectional twat who upset me for no reason other than his own little agenda to make himself feel important.

dog shit through the letterbox then...

JustAnotherManicMummy Sun 04-Oct-09 22:46:55

What a nasty man. I thought if he's that precious about his parking space the thought of you woman driver attempting a complex manoeover would freak him out and get him to move.

I am picturing him now triumphantly exclaiming "And then, Beryl, I said to her 'You'll just have to wait!'"

In my mental picture his cock looks like this

ElectricElephant Sun 04-Oct-09 22:49:14

Exactly! If i'd been anything other than a woman aged 20-40 there is no way he would have spoken like that. Wish I'd have sent my Mum down to get the car, she'd have ripped him a new one grin

ravenAK Sun 04-Oct-09 22:57:45

I think I'd write to him.

No, seriously.

I'd explain, very politely, that by blocking me in he caused me no end of inconvenience, which he could so easily have avoided by quickly moving his car.

I'd suggest that he might like his own wife/daughter to be treated with the courtesy he so disappointingly failed to show to a young mother helping out at the local village hall.

& I'd finish with my phone number, & a suggestion that he might like to ring me to apologise?

& THEN I'd park in the exact same legal spot next time.

Tsssk. Bullying oaf.

TeamEdwardTango Sun 04-Oct-09 23:03:30

JAMM! I've snorted Lucozade all over my laptop!!

JustAnotherManicMummy Sun 04-Oct-09 23:38:32


groundhogs Sun 04-Oct-09 23:53:23

Hmm, i have a feeling he's like my mums DH... when he gets an idea into his head, he has to do it, regardless if he's supposed to be doing something else, been whining at everyone for days that they can't be late... he'll come in - late - and resolve that the lawn needs mowing, to the consternation of everyone now waiting on him... and him in a huff too.

The pea brain you met today, had decided to wash the cars. Simple. You unfortunatly parked exactly where he would have liked to have done to wash them.. So he blocked you in.

Was he a short man btw??? i'm rather thinking he was...

A tosser of first order, but not one that is worth you shedding tears over.

ItIsNotUCM Mon 05-Oct-09 00:00:52

How rude. I would have told him that I was an off duty police officer. grin I have tried that one before and it worked on a similar gentleman.

I wonder what you have to google to get a walnut whip cock like the one linked below!

yodayoda Mon 05-Oct-09 00:03:01

cress...... cress is the answer to all revenge........
he sound like a man with a front outside door mat...
go and water his door mat then sprinkle cress seeds all over it....... you will have to do this in the cover of darkness and may need a black outfit and a watering can..... and with in a few days his door mat will be a carpet of lush greeness. he will be so busy mowing his mat he wont have time to block you in or be so rude !!!!!!
i cressed a whole lounge carpet once!! oops..... and almost went my pants when i saw it in full bloom!
old men seem to always have the grumps, my neighbour is constantly yelling at the birds to "shut up and die!" ?????????????????

StableButDeluded Mon 05-Oct-09 01:02:52

You should have said ' But if I don't get back in time for my medication, they'll take my crayons away. And I'll start thinking about knives again...'

Mwahahaha! He'd have been awake all night wondering if you were going to come back.

Geocentric Mon 05-Oct-09 01:07:26

Oh yoda, am soooo pmsl at the cress carpet!!! That really made my day, I'm going to store that one for future use!

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