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AIBU to not want to have a party for DS's 2nd birthday?

(15 Posts)
ilikeyoursleeves Sun 04-Oct-09 12:43:43

DS had a 'party' when he turned 1 ie, the grandparents, aunties, uncles, cousins and some friends over for tea and cakes etc. It was nice but TBH a real squeeze in our tiny house and it also took lots of preparation etc. His 2nd birthday is in a few weeks time and I'm not sure what to do. I'd like to just go out with us on his birthday (me, DH, DS1 & DS2) and not have a 'party' at the weekend (his birthday is a Wednesday) but I'm worried others will expect a party again or at least all want to see him at some point on his birthday or that weekend. And I can't be doing with loads of constant entertaining esp with a 3 month old here now!

He is still too young to really know about parties so do you think it's fine to just have a family day out on his birthday and that's it? Or AIBU to not have a party again and invite everyone?

ben5 Sun 04-Oct-09 12:46:18

both ds didn't have a party till they were 3!! i must be a horrid mum!!

qwertpoiuy Sun 04-Oct-09 12:46:52

YANBU. What you're doing is just fine.

moomaa Sun 04-Oct-09 12:47:25

People expect something to mark a chid's first birthday, for the adults, not the kids. It's not the same for a second birthday so yanbu.

TrillianSlasher Sun 04-Oct-09 12:48:07

If he doesn't know that it's his birthday then do as you like.

And I mean you - not 'your whole family who all want to make a fuss because they aren't the ones living with a 2 year old and a baby'. They will claim that you don't have to make any effort. This is almost certainly a lie. If they want a party one of them can host, cook, etc, and you can just go along to their house for the afternoon.

evaangel2 Sun 04-Oct-09 12:51:26

YANBU
the 1st birthdays are always special imo, but after that I would leave it till there of school age and have more friends. I only had the 1st birthdays in the house, rest of the time we go out, dh,me &dc's, I love family day outs esp cause there is no mess to clean up!

GoldenSnitch Sun 04-Oct-09 12:52:40

Party's for babies/toddlers are for the parents. DS had one for his 2nd birthday cause I wanted to get all my family and friends in one place and eat some cake. I only had him so it was easy.

Next year he'll be 3 and I will have a 3 month old and I am quite prepared to have a family day with the odd grandparent visit rather that the huge event we had last year. He'll never remember and we can do big birthdays when he's older.

YANBU grin

WhereYouLeftIt Sun 04-Oct-09 15:08:41

YANBU. At this age the party is really for the adults, the child is completely oblivious to why there is cake! If you don't want to do it, don't. Your plan sounds much better.

mazzystartled Sun 04-Oct-09 15:12:21

I expect the grandparents would like to see the boy, though? Why not just invite them for cake?

pigletmania Sun 04-Oct-09 15:14:33

YANBU you dont have to have a full on kiddies tea party for ds 2 to have a lovely time. If he does not understand about birthdays like my dd 2.7 years does not than it is not too bad and you can get way with it.

groundhogs Sun 04-Oct-09 15:56:56

How about celebrating his birthday just as you have said, mum, dad, DS1 & DS2, and have a cake tea on the weekend only inviting the GP...

only if it suits you though... it's your house, your family and your call...

StableButDeluded Sun 04-Oct-09 16:01:29

YANBU at all, family day out is fine, little tea party with the family is fine, whatever YOU want to do is fine. I kept in touch with the other mums from my ante-natal class and when our DSs (we all had boys) were turning two some had little family parties, some had days out.

piscesmoon Sun 04-Oct-09 16:11:47

Just do what you want to do-lavish parties for 2 yr olds are for the parent's benefit-the 2 yr old will be perfectly happy with whatever you provide.

selby Sun 04-Oct-09 19:58:59

We 'just' had both sets of grandparents round for tea & cake for DS's 1st & 2nd birthdays. His 3rd involved a handful of his preschool friends round for a playdate type 'party' where they ran riot around the house and played pin the tail & pass the parcel. His 4th was a bigger party still held at home but with around 10 kids plus their parents. We had moved house to a new area and he started reception so we hired a hall for a whole class party for his 5th with bouncy castle and traditional party games. This year, it's boys only so less than half the class for a mini go-kart activity party. I anticipate that the party numbers scales down quite quickly after the reception year when they have more defined friendships. DD turns 3 next year so the merry go round of parties starts yet again but with girly themes!

We had IL's round for DD1's first birthday and a small cake, we did have a playdate thing planned with my mates and their DC's coming to play but she got sick a few dyas before so I cancelled it.
She will be 2 on tuesday and we are going to the local petting zoo, just DH, the DD@s and I.
However, she is ill again so that might be cancelled toogrin

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