To remove my children from childminder because she reported a parent to ofsted?

[threelittlespeckledfrogs]

I am a regular but have changed my name as I am aware I may be flamed for this.

I have three children, a five year old and two year old twins. They go to the childminder's at seven and she takes my daughter to school and picks her up and looks after the twins all day. I had always thought she was a lovely woman and my kids seem to like her.

In light of the recent publicity over the law on looking after friends' children, we were having a conversation about it. I said that I thought the law was outragious and couldn't see what difference it made. I also said that I couldn't understand what kind of busybody would shop someone to ofsted for looking after a friend's child. She then said that she had shopped someone for doing exactly that.

I asked her why and she said that it was unfair that people should be looking after children without having registered.

What made me more than anything though was that she said that the woman she shopped had to stop caring for her friend's child, and that she then took on this child as a mindee.

So not only has she forced a mother to pay for childcare when she was previously able to have her child looked after by a friend, but she has also gained financially from it as she is minding the child.

I am really angry about this and I have seen her in a totally different light now.

I don't want someone like this looking after my children, so I have given notice and the twins will be going to a nursery and my daughter will have to go to before and after school club.

But I am tempted to tell all the parents of her mindees what she is like.

IBU?

[B1984]

yanbu
she sounds like a spitefull busybody.i wouldn`t let her look after my kids.not sure about telling other parents,jury still out on that one.

[PinkTulips]

i definitely wouldn't want her looking after my kids but i think if you tell the other parents you'd be sinking to her leval, maybe tell them if they ask why you moved your kids but don't seek them out to tell them

[Boys2mam]

YANBU for moving your kids but not sure what purpose it would service telling other parents. It doesn't effect her abilities as a minder it just raises questions of her morality.

I would have thought telling the other parents would bring you down to her level.

[Boys2mam]

Too slow to type - seems PinkTulips and I see it the same way

[ElaineFiggis]

I think that if you think it "calls into question her morality" then I can't see how it can fail to affect her abilities as a minder

If I felt somebody's ethical beliefs/conduct were dodgy, it would rule them out in terms of being left alone with my children

If you don't trust her and don't like her, don't use her.

[preciouslillywhite]

Hmmm...

it doesn't say in your post, OP, whether the friend was looking after the other friend's dc for money or not. If she was getting paid for childminding while not being registered, then it puts a bit of a different slant on it IMO.

[FlamingoBingo]

yanbu to remove your kids. what a spiteful person she sounds

[wannaBe]

i wouldn't have her looking after my children either but not sure I'd tell the other parents. except...

I would tell the parents of the child she is minding because of the friend she reported. If I knew who it was.

[southeastastra]

yes if the 'friend' was getting paid i'm not surprised she was shopped. and a bet alot of childminders on here would agree.

[Itsjustafleshwound]

I think most convictions for these sort of things (benefit cheats/ not CRB checked) comes from disgruntled friends and family...

It is tough, but that's the way the childminding cookie has crumbled ...

[Stigaloid]

I think YABU. Playing devil's advocate here, but If someone is minding a child but is not registered it is in the best interest of the child to have a registered and inspected minder. My friend has recently become a CM and the courses she had to do and the level of safety she needs at her house is up and beyond that of a normal everyday home. She also has to keep up with the EYFS and ensuring the children aren't just watched but develop too. If the childminder thought that a parent was minding but not registered she would know that these checks had not been put in place and that in fact, for the best interest of the child, he/she should be in an evrionment deemed safe and educational.

I personally wouldn't shop someone unless i thought a child was in danger, but at the same time, if i was a fully trained individual and saw that someone else was doing the same job as me but not trained or adherring to the strict regulations put in place to look after kids, i may feel it is my responsibility for the children to ensure they are well looked after. There is nothing to stop the other parent who was minding from going on courses and registering herself.

[junglist1]

YANBU she can't be trusted. Snide

[wilkos]

YABU. there maybe a very different reason she shopped this other woman

perhaps she was a god awful child minder who deserved to be reported

maybe she was charging for her services despite not being registered

just a thought....

[BalloonSlayer]

Is it the law already then?

I thought it was becoming the law soon.

[fluffles]

The OP says: "So not only has she forced a mother to pay for childcare when she was previously able to have her child looked after by a friend, but she has also gained financially from it as she is minding the child."

so clearly the unregistered friend was not recieving money.

i am totally 100% against unregistered 'childcare' as a business but i am also a 100% believer in 'it takes a village to raise a child' and i think that i should be able to recieve help from any member of my community of friends and family whom i trust to look after my child.

[Stigaloid]

No - is law already - has been since about 2006 i think.

[fluffles]

sorry ment to finish that post with so, YANBU and i would also change my opinion of this childminder and stop using her, but i would not tell any other parents unless they asked for my reasons.

[EldonAve]

YABU
If the unregistered person was being paid then she should have been reported - she could have chosen to register

[misskes]

to be honest i think you over reacted a bit?? if your children were always happy with her its a shame you have removed them.
at the end of the day i do agree the law has been taken too far, but she did have the childs best interest at heart.
if you go around telling other mums about her then in my opinion you are being just as bad?? a busybody yourself.
dont distroy the womens business just because you have a different opinion. surely you have better things to do.

[jybay]

"The OP says: "So not only has she forced a mother to pay for childcare when she was previously able to have her child looked after by a friend, but she has also gained financially from it as she is minding the child."

so clearly the unregistered friend was not recieving money."

Sorry, but that doesn't follow. The childminder would still have gained financially if the other (shopped) person had been paid because the money that had been going to the shopped person would be going to the CM instead.

I agree with those who think that it's OK to have shopped if there was money involved.

[questioneverything]

This country is totally twisted. The only motivation for her doing this was jealousy because it represents lost money for her and others.

I tell you big brother is alive and well.

I would be a little careful with this one as I bet she has a hotline to social services aswell.

[PinkTulips]

jybaby... she means the first part of the sentance 'So not only has she forced a mother to pay for childcare when she was previously able to have her child looked after by a friend'

[123andaway]

I can see you CM's point TBH. YABU

She has spent a good deal of time and effort becoming a registered CM. Presumeably she pays tax and NI, has to complete on a daily basis all the forms and records required by ofsted. She then sees someone else doing it on sly, and doing none of this. Im not surprised she was a bit peed off!

This is presuming the person she reported was being paid for her services. If she was not then YANBU and you CM is.

[serenity]

The other parent must have been getting something otherwise it wouldn't have been a problem. You can care for child, just not get 'rewarded' for it.

[pippin26]

So you have removed your children from totally satisfactory childcare where they were happy because you were upset by something the minder has done that has NOTHING to do with you or the child(ren)? And after all she was honest with you - perhaps even going as far as trusting your with a confidence and basically you have thrown it back in her face. Your (ex) minder is entitled to her views - especially regarding her area of expertise, just the same as you are.

I personally think she was right to 'shop' this other woman - especially if the other woman was gaining financially from it. I have no issue what so ever with parents making their own arrangements and I must admit that I think the law as it stands needs some tweaking badly. BUT this other woman, as it stands was breaking the law and if she was receiving money from it she was defrauding the system and that affects all of us.

THings are changing and childminders are very slowly gaining the respect they deserve for the brilliant service (most of us) provide. We have worked hard to get our qualifications, build up our business, earn a living and support our own families - why should we let it be eroded by illegal childcare.

Please don't be so vindictive as to destroy and bad mouth this childminder - after all she has not done anything directly to you has she - all it is, is your difference of opinion of how she has handled a situation that is not even anything to do with the care of your children.