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To think that ?if you do that again I?ll ground you for a week? is a bit OTT

(21 Posts)
OrmIrian Tue 29-Sep-09 09:44:32

When directed towards a 4yr old child on her way to school. Because:

1. Presumably she isn't allowed out alone anyway.
2. She was only kicking a conker along the pavement.
3. If he grounds her for kicking conkers what does that leave him when she is 13 and starts smoking (or worse).


I would have assumed he was joking, if it wasn't for the tone of voice and the fact that he looked so cross.

fandango75 Tue 29-Sep-09 09:48:38

horrible man yanbu i hate that kind of behaviour so mean

OrmIrian Tue 29-Sep-09 09:50:32

It wasn't even the meanness that got to me fandango - simply the pointlessness of it.

fandango75 Tue 29-Sep-09 10:04:53

i know - things like that make me really sad for the little ones. Poor kid

ChazsBarmyArmy Tue 29-Sep-09 10:13:12

Whilst it was clearly an overreaction to what seems like a trivial incident we don't know the background. This may have been the last of a whole chain of events this morning e.g. not getting dressed, tipping cereal over the floor etc. which might of led him to snap. I know from the outside sometimes I might appear to be punishing DS1 for something quite trivial but if he is on a last warning after pushing DS2 over, chucking stuff etc. it may be more proportionate than it appears.

If her only "crime" was kicking a conker then it was out of order but if it was the culmination of a series of events it is understandable if a bit pointless with a 4 yo.

groundhogs Tue 29-Sep-09 10:16:57

Hmm, yes, know what you mean... but after literally having an hooked trout for a DS, wriggling and squirming all the way to playschool this morning, and one who woke up in a right mood, perhaps she may have been playing up badly at home beforehand.

No excuse for the meanness, but so often we see the last straw, and judge on it, perhaps there was a build up...

OrmIrian Tue 29-Sep-09 10:18:30

Yes but....grounding a 4yr old? I mean how? Do most 4yr old go to the park with their mates? Do they take their skate boards and their bikes?

It was just incongruous. I wondered if maybe he was used to bigger children.

OrmIrian Tue 29-Sep-09 10:20:10

And I am familiar with the final eruption of the growling volcano that results from constant winding-up. I have 3 and my youngest is a black belt 6th Dan in it hmm

beaniesinthebucketagain Tue 29-Sep-09 10:23:04

yanbu its horrible to see a child spoke to badly in any situation, but as pp said we dont know the lead up, she may have older siblings which made 'grounded' slip out, as its early in the morning when hed had enough!

fandango75 Tue 29-Sep-09 11:02:24

fair enough not knowing the context and groundhogs you're right wuick to judge, something which i HATE. Grounding a 4 year old though.. hmm

sandcastles Tue 29-Sep-09 11:06:38

Maybe he meant grounding as in no play dates, or after school activities? Maybe she was due to go out that week with friends/family etc.

I agree with ChazsBarmyArmy tho, in the respect that you don't know what lead up to this, so I don't think we can judge why he threatened it, tbh.

Jamieandhismagictorch Tue 29-Sep-09 11:15:08

I would probably have laughed .......

Sounds like hot air from the dad

Callisto Tue 29-Sep-09 11:18:31

Why would kicking a conker be the last straw though? It's not exactly bad behaviour. The father sounds mean, whether or not the girl had been naughty previously.

Jamieandhismagictorch Tue 29-Sep-09 11:20:38

Actually, I hope it was hot air, otherwise he sounds like a bit of a wanker

charlotteolivia Tue 29-Sep-09 11:25:10

kicking conkers/stones can damage cars etc maybe she had already been told not to kick things.

bentneckwine1 Tue 29-Sep-09 11:25:53

When my DS was much younger I used the term 'grounding' in relation to various other activities on a sliding scale depending on the 'crime'.

So my DS could be -
grounded for live tv
grounded for video/dvd
grounded for playstation
grounded for friends in after school
grounded for football training

Probably just the same as removing treats/privellages but I used the term 'grounded' as it was familiar to my son from kids tv and also used by most of his friends. We still use the term but now he is grounded for things like xbox, park on his own or computer time.

TheApprentice Tue 29-Sep-09 11:30:14

But some four year olds are allowed out on their own, sadly. I should know - I've taught a few of them.

BertieBotts Tue 29-Sep-09 11:33:30

I remember being about 6 and one of my classmates broke her hairclip, she was very worried and kept saying "My mum's going to ground me" - I had no idea what she meant and was worried her mum was going to grind her up into little pieces for breaking the hairclip!

Perhaps he meant grounding from screens, or after-school activities, or having friends round?

OrmIrian Tue 29-Sep-09 12:28:06

Oohhh... grounded clearly has more meanings than I suspected....

I see.

Still think it was a bit daft.

ScummyMummy Tue 29-Sep-09 12:44:57

yanbu yanbu yanbu. I've heard this being said to tiny babies and toddlers before now too and I always thought "Good grief you half eejit, you've neither got the hang of this disciplining malarkey nor grasped how to use American English. Or, perhaps worse, you don't realise that babies aged 18 months old should not be playing out alone in the first place." I'm quite glad to hear from bentneckwine1 that it is I who am the foolish fool as the definition of grounded may be much wider than I realised. However, I still agree that to employ it towards a young conker kicker seems bananaheaded on the face of things.

OrmIrian Tue 29-Sep-09 13:10:15

Ha! Knew it wasn't just me scummy grin

There was also something incongruous about seeing this big bloke looking down at these teeny little girl - almost too small for her uniform - and threatening to ground her. Weird.

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