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or is it normal to feel like this...

(16 Posts)
verbatim Sat 26-Sep-09 23:27:40

I always knew motherhood would be hard but I did not realise how hard. DS has had terrible reflux and has had problems with weight gain as a result. He has been cantankerous, probably because of his reflux and I find it so hard because I am not always able to comfort him. To make matters worse I feel like everyone is looking at me and assuming that I am a terrible mother because he cries so much.

DH is generally really sweet and helpful but he has no idea how down this is making me. I think he just thinks that I am coping with it fine.

TBH I sometimes feel like giving up on being a mother and I wish that I could be carefree for one day.

AIBU for feeling like I just want to be left alone and to wish I could get away from it all for just a day.

lavenderkate Sat 26-Sep-09 23:30:34

I had 3 like this verbatim. Damn hard work isnt it.
Is he on meds to help him?

They're all wonderful and healthy now though.

verbatim Sat 26-Sep-09 23:34:13

He is on meds, the usual gaviscon and ranitidine. They do make a difference but he still cries a lot.

It is really tough. I wish I could do something to make it easier. It feels a bit soul destroying at times. Is there any way to cope? How did you get through it?

strawberrycornetto Sat 26-Sep-09 23:35:13

Don't be hard on yourself. The fact that you are writing this and care shows you are a good mother. No one will think you are a bad mother because your baby cries.

I think every mother out there craves a break, and its important to get one too. You will come back feeling rejuvenated. My DS had reflux and even though he wasn't too unhappy with it, it was really tough to know he was ill and I couldn't help him. Keep talking to your DH and try not to feel down. It does get better.

snapple Sat 26-Sep-09 23:36:46

Try not to worry about what you think others are thinking.

Let your dh know how you are feeling.

Sounds really tough going - I don't know how old you baby is - but maybe it is not realistic to get a day out but see if you can just get an hour of your own me-time would help - speak to your dh.

Every baby is different..... and yes I think that it is totally normal for you to feel as you are feeling.

no yanbu at all.

this period will pass.


ineedalifelaundry Sat 26-Sep-09 23:37:30

I sometimes wish I could be carefree for one day too!

You are completely normal. He will get better. You will start to enjoy him more. You are a good mother. This too shall pass.

DandyLioness Sat 26-Sep-09 23:38:35

Message withdrawn

PeachesMcLean Sat 26-Sep-09 23:38:37

Oh gosh no, I remember the feeling well. A crying baby is awful to have to deal with on a regular basis. It wears you down.

Can anyone give you a break? Even just for an afternoon?

And yes, things will get better. But bloomin eck, it can be hard in the meantime.

beaniesinthebucketagain Sat 26-Sep-09 23:38:59


ive had moments like this with both dcs, especially dd who just cried non stop for what seemed like her first 6mnths, its a pain like no other crying out for a break but the mum inside cant bear to leave the baby, Your obviously a good mum as you care enough to talk about it, it will pass and in a year or so youll have a mad toddler, but there will still be these days, and trust me NOONE with kids is judging you, more than likely thinking oh ive been there!
And anyone without had no idea so bloody ignore them,
chin up chuck xxx

verbatim Sat 26-Sep-09 23:41:14

you are all so sweet. I feel like crying now - that will just be the fatigue associated with having a baby.

next week I am gonna make myself having a morning of just me time.

thank you

snapple Sat 26-Sep-09 23:49:45

Hope you have a fantastic morning of me time grin

enjoy it!

cat64 Sat 26-Sep-09 23:50:46

Message withdrawn

lavenderkate Sat 26-Sep-09 23:55:41

Verbatim, they all had varying degrees of it.

One of them was on a feed thickener making it a bit like readybrek. Cisapride, ranitidine etc.

It was very tough at times I'll admit, mostly through the lack of sleep.

How old is your DS?

Get your morning all to yourself, good idea. Bet you really need it.
Plan something lovely even if its just a moment all alone eating a chocolate bar completely in one gogrin

Just be glad its something that gets better everyday as they grow.

DandyLioness Sun 27-Sep-09 00:18:11

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DandyLioness Sun 27-Sep-09 00:28:06

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verbatim Sun 27-Sep-09 21:18:05

Feeling better today. DH was really sweet this morning - we had a really nice chat. He says that he thinks I am doing a great job. It is so nice to hear it. He is sooo lovely. I don't know what I would do without him.

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