To buy some Christmas presents second hand?

[Deemented]

Money is very tight this year.

I've been buying a little bit every month since about May, and putting it aside. But DS, 5, has been going on and on about getting a DSi. To be honest, i don't feel he's old enough for one yet - it's a lot of money for something that's easily broken, and i thing the only reason he wants one is because his cousin who's a year older then him, has one.

So he knows that he will not be getting one. However, i've been talking to DP, and we've come up with the idea of perhaps getting him a gameboy and a few games, and if he's shows me that he's responsible with it, and can look after it, then i'd be inclined to think about getting him a DSi next Christmas.

We went to a car boot sale yesterday, and found a gameboy colour with five games, a battery pack an a few other bits for just a tenner, so we bought it and put it up for him. I was telling my sister about it, and she was horrified that i'd even consider giving him second hand presents. It's in good condition, and works perfectly, so i can't see what the issue is.

DD will be 20 months at Christmas, and she really likes books, yunno the thick card ones, and i've picked a few up for her from car booters that have been in good clean condition. Again sister is horrified and wants assurances that whatever we get her son will not be second hand!!!

AIBU in buying second hand, or is she BU in turning her nose up at it?

[Furball]

YANBU - Just sensible

[eleanorsmum]

Def not! At this age they have no real idea its second hand. DD is 5 and has had second hand stuff lots. all good condition and cleaned etc. Why waste the extra money. Last xmas she got a vtech smile off ebay, the console alone new was £25 but we got the console 11 games, art board, and the hand held version oh and a bag for £15 locally on ebay so didn't even pay postage. All working fine and still played with loads. No way we could have even got close to that package new!

YADNBU!

[ben5]

if it's clean and still works why not buy at carboot/ charity shops. you can get some great new toys for your children without costing the earth. a good bit of recycling to.

[diddl]

OMG!

I cannot believe the snobbery of some people.

Sorry, but when I was young, someone bought you a gift, you were grateful.
You didn´t question it´s "provenance"!

If second hand isn´t good enough for sisters PFB, I´d tell her to stump up the difference for new as you can´t do it this year!

[Foxy800]

I quite agree with the others if its in good condition etc why not. Sorry but your sister is being very stuck up. At the end of the day its the thought that counts.

[posieparker]

There's no way I would buy a toddler second hand board books, you can't clean them and they put stuff in their mouths.

[DorotheaPlenticlew]

I used to clean board books with Milton wipes and felt that was OK. No communicable disease ever came from DS gnawing them.

[bubblagirl]

my ds gets something second hand every year games consoles games etc

he gets enough new presents off everyone else and i have a lot of people to buy for i see nothing wrong with getting a bargain the child will love it no matter what

we charity shop hunt as new things are in there all the time and for friends children its cheaper to do it this way

we always buy ds a new present from us but he does have a lot of second hand i even tell family to buy second hand boot sales etc for toys as why not save money children wont mind where they came from just that they have what they want

[chimchar]

my 2 year old had a fisher price farm for christmas last year. it was fab and cost me £1.50 from our school fayre!

it had a good scrub down and we wrapped it nicely...he was thrilled and had the added bonus of no box the have to undo and fiddle with wirey bits and pieces before playing!

so no, yanbu at all....tbh, its perfectly sensible to me. you're saving money and the environment too.

[DoingTheBestICan]

I think you are spot on actually,as long as they are clean & work whats the problem?

At the end of the day Christmas is supposed to be about Jesus being born & spending time as a family,not how much money you can waste on countless presents.

I would be tempted to buy your dn a gift voucher for somewhere off ebay.

[bubblagirl]

look in charity shop for new present as plenty of new boxed stuff goes in wrap it for sil child and snigger quietly whilst she looks pleased at brand new present he he

[bubblagirl]

meant sis not sil

[posieparker]

AS for gameboys, why not?

Sorry I meant to put that in the original post.

Is Christmas about Jesus? Not for most of us, it's about family and giving. Jesus story just coincides with the winter festivals that's all.

[nickschick]

One year we were moving and had lots of extra expenses - a job dh had done was paid by bloomin cheque that initially bounced and then wasnt clear in time - we could have paid extra for early cheque clearing but tbh every penny counted - so we used what we had.....our dc had cheap pressies but inventive ones and nowadays its that Xmas they remember -the xmas we bought them 'fart putty' and other stuff we never used to like them having.

Everything is 'new' to the person receiving it.

YANBU.

But your sil is.

Your dc will have a fab xmas.

Btw I disagree with the poster who said the books were unhygeinic ....so long as they wipe clean they are fine thats why nurseries and Drs surgeries have them.

[FlamingoDuBeke]

YANBU and your sister is a stuck up snob.

And not buying second hand books for a toddler??? PFB? Wait until you've got a third or fourth baby crawling around putting goodness knows what into their mouths - then you'll realise how sturdy they are! Bugs are good!

[Tombliboobs]

YANBU

It is a good idea, especially when they are so young. Your sister is being a snob and unnecessarily rude.

As for not buying toddlers second hand books. Does that mean people who don't like it don't go to the library or toddler groups, because the books and toys have been used you know! Or allow them to touch any of their friends toys when they visit other people? There is no difference between that and buying second hand.

[Lizzylou]

Goodness, we always have some second hand presents for our boys.
Last year we got a Leapster for DS1 for a great price, this year I am getting him a second hand DS (DS2 will get the Leapster handed down).
Makes sense, DS's are over £100, I'm not paying that! Nor can we afford to tbh.

[smokinaces]

Am I being really thick - what on earth could a child catch from a prechewed toy?

I mean in all seriousness, what bugs are these people worried about? Surely germs etc have a short life span on inanimate objects, and even if they didnt - whats the worst thing you could honestly catch?? Does that mean if you dont like 2nd hand books, you dont go to mother and toddler groups - cos there you can guarantee a toy has been chewed by at least 2 other kiddies in the last 10 minutes.

and OP - YANBU. I admit, I probably wouldnt buy 2nd hand for someone else (we have very small budgets anyway so tend to buy very token bits) but have no problem 2nd hand for the boys - especially bigger bits like bikes etc.

[LoveBeingAMummy]

I get second hand books for DD who is 18mths, i don't see the problem. I ahve also bought second hand clothes and sleeping bags. Have got from charity shops and ebay. Don't blame you at all, in fact when things are not so tight you should carry on and save the extra and then go on holiday!

[PavlovtheForgetfulCat]

You buy a present that will be liked and played with/used, it does not matter where it comes from.

Some of my friends only buy second hand presents. They spend the year looking for things they really think their friends will like, it is like a challenge for them. Sometimes they by amazing things, sometimes they get it a bit wrong. Just like with presents bought from shops. And most of the stuff in their house is 'secondhand' but you would never know as its great stuff.

[Mybox]

What's wrong with second hand? Last year I got some great things from ebay & also the secondhand book shop - real bargains that if bought new would have cost a lot.

[piscesmoon]

I can't believe how precious people get about 2nd hand! If you haven't got much money it is the common sense approach. The DC gets the same amount of pleasure.

[Bucharest]

Dd's playmobil house- second hand
Dd's playmobil supermarket- second hand
Dd's leapfrog wozzermagflops- second hand
Dd's twister game- second hand
Dd's dance mat- second hand.

(not all at once, hasten to add!)

Her main Christmas present is always second hand from ebay....The children are so thrilled with their prezzies they don't question that the box might be a bit scuffed.

[cleanandclothed]

Absolutely not. My DS is nearly one (and my PFB) and he only has new things (as opposed to secondhand) when absolutely necessary (cot mattress, car seat). Everything else is secondhand or borrowed from library/toy library. For his birthday I have actively encouraged people to buy second hand. This partly from a cost point of view, but also from a 're-use/re-cycle' point of view. I would far rather people spent effort looking for something he will really like, than thinking 'Oh I want to spend about £20, lets see John Lewis has' and seeing the value in the amount they spent rather than the amount of time DS will spend using it.

But perhaps you could chat to your sister and find out why she really objects? Is it purely that she wants a 'sufficient' amount of money spent on her DD (in which case that sounds a bit off). Or is she concerned about germs (you could make sure you could buy her something that could be thoroughly sterilised). Or is she worried it would look rather tatty (she may not have much experience of the secondhand market and that most is very good quality ?).

[MrsGokWantstogocampingagain]

YADNBU. Your SIL is being stupid. I always look round the charity shops all year round and have a drawer where stuff gets put and bought out for birthdays and Christmas.

Yesterday I picked up a Thomas rugby shirt and matching hooded, zipped top. Six Disney DVD's, 2 Night Garden DVD's all looking brand new. A box set of 7 Dr. Who books and a box set of Dr. Who monster books still in the celophane. I spent the grand total of £20.Bargain. The DC's will love them and be really excited about getting them.

Two years ago we bought DS1 a second had DS and he was so chuffed. He understood it was second hand but was so happy that we had bought him something he wanted even though it was the old style. We are looking at getting him a newer one this year, not the DSi but we know he will be happy with it.