AIBU or is the school.(67 Posts)
School has always had an open door policy in the mornings you can go in and sit with your dc at breakfast club or sit with your child reading outside the classrooms you can also use this time to chat with the teacher of you have any problems (This is how school has always done it since I started taking my dc there almost 8 years ago).Reception also ask that parents help lo's into pe kit one morning a week.
However since going back the head has decided to ban parents from anywhere apart from breakfast club and has also banned prams from anywhere in the school you are not allowed to use the main entrance to come into school and now there is a very unwelcome atmosphere on at the school it is like trying to gain entry to a vip nightclub not your childs school.
The pram issue is very unhelpful as apart from the main entrance everywhere else has steps she is also asking parents to leave the prams outside if you do come into school so imagine if you need to speak to a teacher you have to remove your baby from a warm pram carry it across a wet/cold playground possibly carrying numerous lunchboxes /homework folders because the little buggers children have run on ahead then get up numerous sometimes slippy steps with loads of children barging past you and your baby when before teachers would be around and you could have a quick word in the breakfast club .
Now if you do want to see the teacher as a lot of parents do at the beginning of terms you have to go in to the class when the bell goes and stand with other parents to talk about possibly private stuff and also disrupting the start of the school day.
The HT is refusing to consider that her new rules are a bit daft she is the type who always wants to win a battle and won't back down.
From what I can see most of the staff think it is mad and don't know whats going on .
It hasn't been thought through .
I am not a helicopter parent in fact dp takes them to school most mornings I just do not like the unwelcome atmosphere and been barked orders at by members of staff who when asked to go through the new rules with me haven't got a clue what to say .
Lots of parents are not very happy with it all it just seems very silly.
BTW (am trying to give all info so not doing it by stealth) the breakfast club was started by the head for in her words "parents teachers and children to have a good start to the day" and has often mentioned to parents in passing about joining us at breakfast club tomorrow .Oh and before anyone says it is awful to have parets milling about the school in the morning there is a system (her idea again) breakfast club starts at 8.30 am at 8.50 am a bell goes this was a signal for anyone who wants to have a chat with a teacher or children who needed to get ready for pe 9.00am another bell goes this signals start of school day all chldren to assembly/pe and parents OUT always worked so if it ain't broke why fix it?.
so which bit has changed? that you can't take prams in and you can't go in the classroom? the bells thing still happens so you can see teacher and sort pe?
makes sense to me
my friend was stressing at her school when they said no prams. so she got a sling.
sounds like a normal school to me
if you want to talk to the teacher you make an apponimtment at our school
no prams/pushchairs are allowed into the buolding as they make the place filthy and get in the way
She is being unreasonable about the prams. But she's not about other stuff. Breakfast clubs are usually for children of busy Mums who need to drop children off early. Also In most schools you would speak to the teacher at the end of the day unless you had something urgent and important to tell them.
Have you asked them what prompted such a drastic change all of the sudden? Did the school staff have complaints about something some parents were doing?
i can understand i think your annoyance at the pram thing. at our school in reception there is just no room for a pram so poor parents have to leave prams/buggies outside the door but still have to take older children in (!)
but talking to the teachers?
how often do you have to do that, really?
But if your child tells you something that has happened at school the day before for example a bullying incident then you would want to mention it to the teacher in the morning surely?
All Mums are busy I think well all the ones I know are. The Ht started the breakfast club for everyone these were her words she wanted the school to have a family atmosphere and everyone was welcome it was helpful for mums with newbies to get to know other parents and it was also helpful for children who had parents going to work early .
again - sounds pretty normal to me, in fact I'm surprised that its taken this long for the school to restrict parental access to the building.
a bullying incident?
how often does that happen?
I must take my children to school in teh morning once a month if that but it has always been that way if you want to chat with a teacher you do it in the morning .
No word as to why she has done this just lots of bouncers teachers hanging around with clipboards I fear she may say it's health and safety .
The going into school thing is also not just about talking to teachers they ask you to help with PE dressing which is a PITA and they have outside a lot of classrooms comfy chairs and sofas with bookcases where parents are encouraged to sit with their children in the morning.
According to the deputy head these are to be moved though.
Not everyday I was giving it as an example but if you need to make your teacher aware of something that you yourself only became aware of after school the previous day then the way it has always been done in our school is you speak to the teacher in the morning not saying it is right is is just the way it has always happened .
heads tend to make these changes... i am sure there is a way round it though.
I still think something must have happened. They would not have gone from "everyone is werlcome in " to "no parent/pushchair passed this point". They must have realised in some way thst there previous policy was not serving their/the pupils best interest maybe?
I must say our school is very welcoming but parents are definitely not invited to sit oustide the classromm to read books with their Dcs.
Well our school doors open at 8.45 and you have 10 mins to get child settled, chat to teacher etc along with all the other parents. Anyone who has anything private to discuss just asks for a private chat at another time and everyone else just gets on with what needs getting on with.
Sounds like you have been rather priveleged beforehand and are now moving in line with other schools practices. I don't think you can really complain about a return to normal.
Prams, well, there is no room for them in most schools. Most parents naturally leave them outside TBH. As for battling across the playgrond with baby, bags and millons of children milling around your feet just desperate to see the pair of you off - don't you think you are going a little over the top on that one?
Honestly, you are now getting what most people always got, move with it or you will simply mark yourself as a moaning minnie.
I can understand her wanting to make changes if it is not working anymore for the school it is just her complete refusal to discuss it any further or tell us why all the changes when she banged on for two years in her boring assemblies she guilted us all into attending about the school been a family and all families welcome .
I'm not surprised they are trying to cut down on parents milling about the school in the mornings, it must be bedlam.
At DS's school they eventually banned parents from coming in to the school because we had a spate of thefts (including a couple of laptops, and a teacher's car keys, so the car was nicked as well). No one blamed a parent as such, but if people are just milling around the school, you can't tell who should be there, and who shouldn't. I imagine this applies in many schools.
"they have outside a lot of classrooms comfy chairs and sofas with bookcases where parents are encouraged to sit with their children in the morning" Blimey this is VERY unusual, tbh as a school governor, I can see this being quite problematic, getting kids actually settled into class, some kids being upset cos their parent won't/can't come in, etc etc etc.
It may also have been commented on from a child safety point of view too.
I'm not surprised they have decided to change the way of doing this, and I think you just have to put up with it.
We don't go into the building at all in the morning - just into the playground where they line up. No guarantee that I will see the teacher at all - often the TA comes to collect the class. If I really need the teacher to know something, the system is that I write it in DD's home-school contact book. I would be able to see the teacher face to face at the end of the day, or by appointment.
Maybe HT had a very bad summer break and now hates anything remotely looking like a family?
I do agree with you that such a radical change of rules should be accompanied by some sort of explanation, even if it is a given that the policy is there to stay .
But it is hard to carry a baby and help your lo get ready for pe(which the still want you to do BTW ) or to walk up some slippy steps .
I don't mind leaving the pram in the playground I won't leave my baby in the playground though and I do mind slipping while holding my baby I'm sure other Mums do too .
But before you all say I will get my dc ready for pe before they go to school and anyway dp usually drops them off before work.
It just seemed so much more unfriendly today made me feel a bit sad it was a really good system before .
Our school used to be a lot more accommodating but has now really restricted access for parents/carers. Anyone coming into the scool for any reason (even to retrieve their child's forgotten PE kit at the end of the day, for example) must be signed in and wear a badge.
Not a lot of parents know this, but the reason is that twice last year there were incidents with strangers (ie not parents, staff or carers) wandering into the school any not being noticed. The first time some school equipment and staff handbags were stolen, the second time the man was challenged but couldn't explain his presence there and ran off. Its not like we live in a rough area either, in fact it is a very good area and the school doesn't have walk-past footfall either, so its unlikely someone just wandered in without targetting the school specificallt iyswim.
Yes, it is a pain that the rules have changed, but the head felt it was a necessary move to ensure the safety of the children and I have to agree with him there (even though I don't generally agree with a lot of his 'new' ideas).
There could be a good reason why they have had to restrict access, but have not told everyone as to do so might cause many parents to worry.
I would love my dd's school to ban parents from coming into the school unless it's urgent or they have an issue to discuss with teacher! It drives em crazy that we have to take our kids into school, hang their coats up, sort out their lunches, thene xpected to sit with them and read until the bell rings. The kids with parents who have to rush to work get upset as the non working mummies and daddies are all sitting with their kids and then when it's 9am time for all to go the other kids are crying as they've had their parents sdat there for 15 minutes. Would be much better to ddo it as we did when I was at school - bell rings in the playground at 8.50, kids line up, teacher takes them in! So much easier, no hassle.
Also - I'm glad they don't allow buggies in the building too, I think YABU wanting to. They crowd the place so people are bumping into each other and if it's wet or muddy outside they make all the corridoors filthy too. It's not that much hassle to take a baby out of a pram to carry them into class. Or do what some parents in dd's class do and leave the baby and pram outside for 10 mins . I walk out to find prams unattended all over the playground!
But it wasn't bedlam it was a very good system and every parent was out of the school by 9am .
As for thefts you can't get into classrooms /offices without a member of staff but I suppose it could happen.
I think the first way sounds fab and very welcoming, just because it isn't the norm in other schools doesn't mean it has to change. Why should things change for the worse?
I don't think it was just thefts they were concerned about. To be honest, I think it raised their awareness of wider child protection issues.
It must be very difficult for teachers to prepare for the day ahead with any number of parents coming in to the classroom have a word. I find it surprising that this is allowed. But why not give the head a call and talk through your concerns?
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