We have two DCs and have always thought three would be nice if we could, but DH wants to wait another year or so (I'm 35 already), and has recently revealed to me (by way of my successful Spanish inquisition techniques) that he is £9k in debt which worries me as even with best intentions that'll take us years to pay off . Before all that I was contemplating anyway all the toil TTC, then (if we're lucky) pregnancy, birth and then having 3 under the age of 3 or 4 would have on me (body and mind). Now having also to consider financial aspects too.
Should any of this really be a consideration when TTC or is it all a bit too clinical and 'planned'?
I am livid! A combination of loans, credit cards, overdraft and lying, essentially! We discussed our debts last year when looking to move house and knew he had no savings, but certainly didn't know about that.
I wish I could be stronger about the just not considering another baby, but I've always imagined having three and, just a year or so ago, it was all still possible without too many obstacles.
i think it is eminently sensible to take all of this into consideration. however i'm like you and always thought i'd have 3 and part of me is appalled i might let such trifling matters get in the way of a lovely new life. in my heart of hearts though i reckon we're stopping now.
I'm sure lots of ladies on here with 3 DCs will probably jump in and disagree, but a friend of mine has 3 and has always said it can be a funny number.
She loves them all dearly of course and wouldn't have it any other way, but they often seem to be more a 2 and 1 and sometimes one can get left out when they're all playing together (which one is being left out also changes on a daily basis!).
Also she has bother booking accomodation for holidays sometimes as so much tends to be geared to a family of 4.
Plus when you have more than 2 you have to change your tactics when out and about as man-to-man marking is no longer an option!
Any of this making you feel better...? Probably not, but these are the sorts of things I tell myself when I'm wistfully wishing for another! That and I don't think my pelvic floor would survive another pregnancy intact! Tenalady anyone...?
Thanks pjmama. It is useful to hear practical reasons too (esp. the pelvic floor one - hadn't thought of that!) lol
I'm from a family of three and recognise your friend's predicament! My mum's pointed out the two hands, two children simple algebraic equation (though that does make me ponder, especially as I'm the 3rd!)
Can I be nosey and ask how old you were? Did you try and then stop trying, or never try? (btw, I am eternally grateful for my gorgeous DCs who are loads of fun, if more than enough to handle on many occasions!
32 with first and almost 34 with 2nd. So, not that old. Hubby didn´t want more, and I knew I could be happy with 2. So, accepted it & never tried for more. Also, I think what I really wanted was to always have a newborn!