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AIBU?

to be fed up with everyone calling my dd (10 weeks) a 'bruiser'!!

48 replies

llynnnn · 25/08/2009 20:15

i am well aware she is a bigger than average baby. she was born 8lb 10oz and at 7weeks (havent had her weighed since!) she was 13lb so on 90th centile and she is also on same centile for her length. but why do people always have to say 'shes a big baby', 'shes a bruiser' and the best one from the hv (which is why she hasnt been weighed in a while) 'hope you dont break my scales'

yes she may be big and chubby but she is also gorgeous, happy, content, always smiling, just perfect!! its not like i'm going to put her on a diet is it!!!

sorry for the rant, feel better for getting it out my system!!

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HaggisNeepsnTatties · 25/08/2009 20:16

YABU..she is gorgeous and you know that so why worry about what anyone else says!! DD1 was the same but it never bothered me tbh....

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thisisyesterday · 25/08/2009 20:17

ahh yeh people just feel the need to comment on something
i have a big baby too, although he is a he, so i also get lots of rugby player comments and stuff too.
he's 9 weeks and off the scale for height and 98th centile for weight!

big, fat babies are bloody lovely though. none of those skinny little things in this family lol

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onepieceoflollipop · 25/08/2009 20:19

People always seem to comment about the size of a baby - makes a change from chatting about the weather.

fwiw my dd1 was almost 10lb (and I am very petite) so had a lot of comments. Dd2 was "only" 8lb 4, everyone kept saying "ooh mrsonepiece what a big baby" which made me lol as she was tiny compared to her big sister.

Bet your new dd is gorgeous. Congratulations.

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wheredidiputmyfone · 25/08/2009 20:21

YANBU for being protective to your DD, but I'm sure anybody who comments on her size are just making a positive connection between a bigger baby and a healthy baby (not that smaller babies are not healthy ).

Everybody finds something nice to say about a baby, and I would take it as a complement, nobody in their right minds would be meaning she needs to lose any weight!

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wheredidiputmyfone · 25/08/2009 20:24

BTW my DD was 9lbs 1oz when she was born and I revelled in her being big

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Mothlene · 25/08/2009 20:25

I had exactly the same and the record can get a little stuck...my ds was 9lb, blue eyed and bald until 2 yrs...If I had one 'Grant Mitchell' comment, I had them all.

It really is just that people want to talk about babies and as they're, well, babies, most people just concentrate on appearances rather than character.

YUNBU, but make up a few ironic/ funny responses to make you feel better next time it happens.

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chimchar · 25/08/2009 20:29

yanbu, but i'm sure that none of the comments are meant as a crticism...people just like to comment on babies in general.

i have had 3 kids, one HUGE baby girl, one really skinny baby boy, and one average, and each and every one of them had comments made about their size.

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hungryhorse · 25/08/2009 20:31

Lol my baby was big- 97th percentile for weight. When I took him to the baby clinic at about 8 weeks I was told that if I looked at his wrists and his cheeks it was obvious that he was obese and that I should stop force-feeding him!!

I did not go back to the clinic ever again. I was proud my baby was a "little bruiser" and when he was ill a while ago and didnt eat or drink milk for 2 days he was fine. If he was a "skinnier" baby he may not have been quite so fine after.

They are just jealous that you have such a healthy little baby.

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SpawnChorus · 25/08/2009 20:34

YABU. It's just small talk...there's not an awful lot to say about young babies other than how big/small they are.

FWIW I was terribly proud whenever anyone said this about DD and DS, but I got my comeuppance as they both turned puny after about 6 months.

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funkybuddah · 25/08/2009 20:37

People kept saying that my DS woudl have to play rugby as he wa so chunky, fast forward 7 years and he is skinny as you like, he wouldnt last 2 minutes! In fact he is more likely to become a luvvie in musical theatre hahahaha

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StayFrostysSister · 25/08/2009 20:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mumcentreplus · 25/08/2009 20:53

Ahh don't worry they always have something to say..my DDs were a similar size and people commented about ...hair,don't they look like daddy,lovely and big, just small talk...only worry if they don't say anything

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jybay · 25/08/2009 20:57

Many people still think that a mum will be pleased to be told she has a bouncing baby. I'm sure they mean it as a compliment.

Just as a matter of interest, would you mind so much if she were a boy?

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Heated · 25/08/2009 21:04

FIL kept calling nb DD2 chubby - she wasn't, just DS1 was so slim, so mildly irritating I agree, but ppl just want something to say as, well, babies don't do a lot!

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ElieRM · 25/08/2009 21:07

Sure its meant as a compliment.
Big baby, in most people's minds equates to a healthy baby. I bet she's gorgeous, and I bet everyone that see her notices. Very rarely is anything said about babies not meant in a positive way, and as a compliment to the mother!
My DD was 7 pounds at birth, and I frequently got 'Ooh, she's such a tiny little thing!'
I jsut took it to mean' small, dainty and gorgeous!'

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forehead · 25/08/2009 21:12

when i say that a baby is a bruiser, i mean that the baby is a healthy beautiful baby. My daughter was 5lb when she was born and i secretly envied all the big babies on the ward. Don't be offended.

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flopalong · 25/08/2009 21:15

My DS3 is off the scale in height, the HV was wooping and got the other HV and staff nurse to come in and conifirm it. It really does my head in when people tell me he's going to be trouble. WHY. My brother is 6ft7 and was never in trouble.
I also feel the need to tell people how old he is because he is the same height as his sister who is 18month older. I know he will be bigger than her sonn and obviously she can do more than he can. People have actually said "it must be so hard for you to see how clever he could be" grrrr

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llynnnn · 25/08/2009 21:17

thanks for all your replies, maybe i am being a tiny bit unreasonable to be annoyed by it, shouldnt care what other people think hope you are right about it being a compliment!! all everyone said about dd1 was how much hair she had which isnt ever seen as a negative thing, whereas weight/size is iykwim!!

i will stop being so annoyed and always say 'yes shes gorgeous' (thanks stayfrosty!)

jybay - think i would feel just the same if she was a boy tbh, cant see why it would be any different?

hungryhorse - at baby being called obese!! is it possible to force feed a baby?? dd has only ever ate when hungry and soon stops/is sick when she is full!

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flopalong · 25/08/2009 21:18

in contrast DS1 and DD were so skinny I was always being asked if they were premature

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peppapighastakenovermylife · 25/08/2009 21:19

I get this a lot - it was a running joke especially when she was exclusively breastfed and off the scale. She is starting to slim down but I love her baby photos. No one was ever mean but they did like to comment a lot. I saw it as affectionate teasing - if it was really offensive not everyone would say it would they.

I never quite got over the old lady sticking her head in the pram and saying 'ooooh, HE's going to play for Wales isn't HE'.

NO SHE ISNT LOL

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StayFrostysSister · 25/08/2009 21:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

glasgowtomelbourne · 26/08/2009 02:15

My doctor said to my DS 'Oh aren't you a little cutie', I said to him 'You say that to all the babies'.
Apparently, no he doesn't. The ones that aren't so cute he says 'Oh he looks just like you!'
YANBU to be fed up with the comments.

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deaddei · 26/08/2009 07:16

YANBU.
My dd was the hugest baby- and not in the least attractive, even to us if I'm brutally honest. She had no hair, eczema on her face and was the most miserable, antisocial child you could imgagine. One woman actually looked in the pram and said "well it could be anything couldn't it!"
Thing was, she did have a point.
She was a bit of an ugly duckling, but has turned into a tall, willowy 13 year old, who is truly stunning. (just like me!)

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flopalong · 26/08/2009 07:40

Does anyone else feel really bad when you see an ugly or weird looking child. I think Katie price little girl is very strange looking, maybe she will be an ugly duckling. Does this make me a bad person??
I also look at some photos of my kids and think WOW that caiught you in a bad light, I don't say it out loud now beucause I was looked at like a bad mum last time I said it

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PM73 · 26/08/2009 07:40

YABU,what else is there to say about a newborn except their size?

You know she is lovely & cute so why get worked up over it?

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