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more of a "what would you do"

(9 Posts)
macana Wed 29-Jul-09 16:21:19

Ok, so I've discovered that 3 women who pretend to be all nice and friendly to my face, have, in fact, been slagging me off behind my back for months.
I'm not surprised at all at one of them, as she has, until recently, said very unpleasant things about one of her new allies, but now that it's in her interest to befriend this lady, lets call her R, she has.
So, do I let them know I know what bitches they are and tell them all to fuck off, as I'm much better off without them, or do I just not initiate any contact but rise above it (which I always do, and, have to say, normally feel like a bit of a doormat).In fact, I could just blow the whole thing apart and make it really messy and let R know that L went behind her back and complained to our boss about her work, although to her face never says anything, but maybe that would be too bitchy.

Would you just back off and be grateful not to waste more time with such horrible people, confront them, or let each know how much of a "friend" their friends really are......

YanknCock Wed 29-Jul-09 16:26:14

Just back off. Really. Have as little contact as possible, don't give anything away about yourself, and thank goodness that you found out and don't need to waste time hanging around with them anymore.

Doesn't make you a doormat, makes you quite sensible. You can't 'prove' anything, and you just wind up making enemies for no reason.

notanumber Wed 29-Jul-09 16:27:50

How do you know that they've been being nasty about you, Macana?

ineedalifelaundry Wed 29-Jul-09 16:30:01

Back off. Be cold but don't explain why. They're all bitches and they deserve each other. You're bigger than that. Enjoy the moral highground and leave them to stew in their own juices.

englishpatient Wed 29-Jul-09 16:31:06

I would never see or speak to any of them again, if possible!

AMumInScotland Wed 29-Jul-09 16:47:40

Rise above it. You're not being a doormat as long as they're not taking advantage of you - like you giving them lifts even though they are being bitchy. You're just ignoring their stupidity.

You can be happy knowing what they are like you won't be taken in by them, and they'll all no doubt fall out soon enough anyway, as people like that can't manage to stay nice for very long at a stretch. So they get what they deserve, without needing you to get involved.

PM73 Wed 29-Jul-09 18:28:23

Ignore them,play it very cool so that they know there is something up but you havent actually said what.

They sound very bitchy & you sound lovely.

Fuck 'em.

macana Thu 30-Jul-09 18:06:13

thanks ladies - overwhelming support for the do nothing approach. I think I'll take your advice - really does hurt though. BUt these types of people are not worth knowing.

ineedalifelaundry Thu 30-Jul-09 21:55:52

Good decision macana. Spend your energies on people worth spending them on. smile

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