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..or do all 4-year old kids (except mine) do this?

(22 Posts)
Pennybubbly Wed 29-Jul-09 03:19:47

Went to pick up 4-yr old DD from nursery yesterday and there were two other mums collecting their DD and DS respectively. The DD (not mine) was ahead of the DS and was heading with her mum towards the gate when she turned round and at the top of her voice shouts "WILLY!" to the boy. He then in turn shouts "POO!" back to her.
If it had ended there, I would have thought fair enough, kids being kids etc, but it then continued for the next few minutes with various childish 'insults' being screeched louder and louder, with the respective mums just ignoring the banter. The mother of the dd was actually waiting at the gate with a "what-can-you-do" expression on her face, while her daughter had returned nearer to the boy to continue their charade.

What made it worse was that the boy was actually shouting in my ear as we were putting our shoes on at the same time / same place.

Now my DD is no angel, and I know wees, poos, etc are HILARIOUS to most kids, but to go on and on?

Wouldn't you let it go once or twice and then tell them to --shut it-- calm down?
Would anyone else have got mildly irritated at this? Not in the same league as hitting, bullying of course (nowhere near) but basic manners, n'est-ce pas?

Just to stress btw, that it was the mums I was hmm at, for not saying anything at all.

DidEinsteinsMum Wed 29-Jul-09 04:03:56

my ds doesnt do that but giggling at stinky farts, burps and not using manors thats another matter. He has however just entered a perfectly normal name calling phase with selective memory. Cant wait for that to end. Apparently wont til hes nearly nine. the joys. grin

Othersideofthechannel Wed 29-Jul-09 06:25:24

In our family there are 6 cousins (inc my DCs) aged between 4 and 6. Three lots of 2 siblings.
The last two years, family gatherings have been seriously punctuated by this kind of toilet humour. I don't think you can stop it without being totally authoritarian. We choose to forbid it at the table because it puts other people off their food and proper conversation. Otherwise they just get on with it.

I would have tol my child not shout right next to your ear but otherwise leave them to get on with it. As long as they are saying this words to each other, and not to other adults who might be offended.

MmeLindt Wed 29-Jul-09 06:43:29

My day is punctuated by the sounds of my DC saying "toilet words". I do say to them that toilet words belong in the bathroom, but this has less and less effect on them.

DS is worse than DD (as are his friends) and the worst of them have older siblings.

If my child had been shouting in another parent's ear then I would have said something, but I don't think there is much the mums could have done about the toilet words.

woodenchair Wed 29-Jul-09 08:05:29

I regularly get greeted with "hello poo mummy"

Brightens my day every time, not.

In a public place though ds gets pulled up on it and definitely no shouting near people

piscesmoon Wed 29-Jul-09 08:10:38

I took the view of Otherside of the channel-luckily it doesn't last long. I wouldn't, however, tolerate being called 'poo mummy' or upsetting adults.

123andaway Wed 29-Jul-09 08:14:44

DS2 (8) and DD (6) still do this, frequently!!!! There is a most definite line, and they know it - but the wees, poos and bums, while not encouraged are tolerated!

I think the vast majority of kids do this at some point, it's normal.

dilemma456 Wed 29-Jul-09 08:16:09

Message withdrawn

raffyandted Fri 31-Jul-09 09:56:31

Sorry, I'm a latecomer to this thread. I think it's normal but I would have told them to quieten down a bit arouind the other parents.
DS is nearly four, thinks saying 'wee-wee' and'poo' is hilarious. We do actually make a bit of a game of it, which with hindsight was probably a mistake. He calls me a 'big banana', I call him a 'big turniphead', then this degenerates into 'you're a big POO' or 'you're a wee-wee AND a poo!' and I pretend to be horribly shocked, which he loves.

I have drilled into him however that it is just a game we play at home & he mustn't say that to anyone else because they would think it's very rude and might be upset. And so far so good.

prettyfly1 Fri 31-Jul-09 10:03:25

lol - hello poopy mummy - your stinky is my sons favourite term of endearment. I dont however allow him to shout it across the public. Its perfectly normal but I think we should still be letting them know its not entirely socially acceptable.

stealthsquiggle Fri 31-Jul-09 10:08:51

I would have told my child to be quiet, under those circumstances.

..but apparently I am reputed to be scary draconian Mummy and therefore not a good guide to 'norms' sadblush

Mumcentreplus Fri 31-Jul-09 10:13:39

Both my DDs 5 and 7 do this..every 5 minutes they are down stairs complaining about each other 'Mummy she called me Monkey bottom poopy poop head!'..'Mummy she said I looked like a cats bum with whiskers' and so on and so forth..I just say it's not kind to call each other names whilst stifling a laugh..my DD2 is especially adept at making up songs about DD1s poop face to drive her nuts grin

TrinityRhinoIsInDetention Fri 31-Jul-09 10:14:06

I would have let it go for a cople of 'rounds' as in each kids shouts twice

then I would have stopped my child for reason of shouting in public isn't neccessary

and I get bored of the poop, willy, bum stuff lol

Mumcentreplus Fri 31-Jul-09 10:15:10

but in public I would have told them it was unacceptable and rude stealh you are not alone..wink

Heifer Fri 31-Jul-09 11:14:54

I think I must be very strict because I would tell my DD (5.5) for calling or shouting Poo or Willy!. - even at home.

Obviously I don't have a problem with her using those words in context but not to name call or shout..

But then I am known for being a 'mean mummy'...

So to answer the op - I would have put a stop to it after the first round..

scrummymum Fri 31-Jul-09 12:21:36

I'm with you Heifer. My DD doesn't really do this much but if she uses a 'toilet word' out of context then I tell her that that it is not a nice word to shout out.

I would have pulled her up on it if she was name calling with those words.

I would never punish her for using them but they need to know that it isn't acceptable to call people 'poo head', especially if they are screaming them in public.

squeaver Fri 31-Jul-09 12:25:52

The shouting is not acceptable. But, the poo-wee-bum obsession is never-ending among all the 4 year olds I know.

hmc Fri 31-Jul-09 12:30:37

Tbh I wouldn't bother to pull up my dc's on this if they were outside and simply passing by other people en route to the car, as in the scenario you describe. They would constitute only a momentary 'nuisance' to other people, so I would expect others to lump it, quite frankly

However if they were engaging in this kind of silly (in my view, essentially harmless) banter in an enclosed public area such as a cafe, etc - bearing in mind the stuffed shirt prissyness of the general population at large I would get my children to desist from doing it..simply to avoid the unpleasantness of all that crashingly boring disapproval

Heifer Fri 31-Jul-09 19:40:25

Well I guess I must be a stuffed shirt prissy and a crashing bore then..

I don't think I am that different to my friends with their children. I know that my DD would get told off at school is she used ANY toilet word.

I do wonder if my reaction is different because I only have 1 DD so haven't had the banter that you would get with 2 or 3.

daisymaybe Fri 31-Jul-09 21:42:38

My youngest mindee (3) does this, shouting "bye bye poopoohead" etc when leaving friends (and getting similar back).

I came to the conclusion that telling her off would just make it even more exciting and taboo and therefore even more irresistible. Obviously I still attempt to distract her etc but it seems to be happening less and less recently, I think that the shine has come off of it a bit.

chegirl Fri 31-Jul-09 21:53:22

Ignoring is sometimes the best thing. But I think I wouldve called a halt to all that screeching.

I thought I got away with the poo poo stage with DS2. Then a 'friend' started coming round with her kids. They spent the whole time yelling poo bum etc. DS picked this up and it took me months to get him out of it. I know he got it from this girl because he said in the same horrible whiney way pauw pauw. ICK. I still get shivers when I think about it.

mummyloveslucy Fri 31-Jul-09 21:55:57

My daughter says things like "That looks like a huge pile of poo poo". She's 4.
I just say in a stern tone, "No I don't like that talk". She has a giggle but won't continue with it.
I always nip it in the bud. She knows she gets no attention from me for saying things like that. wink

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