to not go to a wedding

[NaccetyMac]

that I am performning at (playing during the meal) because DS2, aged 6 months, has crackling/ wheezing on his chest, has been given an inhaler and is going blue every so often? Not that I don't trust DH, but DS is feeding a lot, probably for comfort mainly.

Anyway, the wedding is tomorrow, and I think I ought to let Bride know today that I won't be going. Other people think that this is silly and that I should either take DS2 with me (because coughing children as an accessory are SUCH a good look) or just leave him and stop being a Freaky McClinger.

So, AIBU?

[MmeLindt]

If it were not for the "going blue every so often" then I would have said go. Your DS really does not sound well and will be more settled when you are there.

Call right away and suggest an alternative musician if you can think of someone.

[skidoodle]

He's sick and he needs you. YANBU

[hercules1]

Are you breastfeeding? If so then of ocurse you cant go to the wedding. If they don't understand that then they are being unreasonable.

[NaccetyMac]

Yes, breastfeeding, constantly today!

[hercules1]

There you go then. Baby has to come first.

[DrunkenDaisy]

have you got any musician mates who can do it instead of you?

[orangehead]

Perfectly reasonable

[Blondeshavemorefun]

yabu to cancel going at such short notice - esp for a wedding - very unlikely she will be able to find someone else

cant dh come with you and have/comfort ds while you play?

though sorry to hear ds not well, hope he is better soon

[FabBakerGirlIsBack]

If he is going blue shouldn't he be in hospital?

YANBU to not go but you are to not have told the bride already.

I would try and find a replacement.

Hope he is better soon.

[NaccetyMac]

He just goes blue for a few seconds before a big cough, GP said that's scary but OK, any worse and we are to go to casualty.

[skybright]

Is it an all night performance from you or a couple of sets?

If it's the former i would stay at home and tell her as soon as possible ,the latter i would let her know what's going on and trust your DH a little bit.

I hope he gets better quickly.

[skybright]

Sorry re read your post,during the meal..about an hour? I think i would go on the understanding that she knows if your baby needs you in that time then he comes first.

[woozlet]

I agree with blondeshavemorefun - is it possible for dh to bring ds and wait in a bedroom or something (presuming its at a hotel) until you are done?

[SolidGoldBrass]

Sometimes shit happens. If your DS is very ill and you need to stay home then you need to stay home BUT you must ring round your mates and fellow musicians and do your best to provide someone to perform in your place, then let the bride know. She won't be pleased and you need to show that you understand her distress and are doing your best to minimize the impact on her wedding.

[NaccetyMac]

She was fine. I think I love her! She was more concerned about DS than about her wedding. Bless her, an Anti-zilla!

[FabBakerGirlIsBack]

Fantastic! What an amazing woman.

What will she do now?

[Blondeshavemorefun]

bless her

hope your ds is better soon

and dont forget a HUGE pressie to your friend

[MmeLindt]

What a lovely woman. Hope that your DS is better soon.

[SolidGoldBrass]

That's nice of her, glad it turned out OK. And hope your LO recovers soon.